Anonymous
Post 02/22/2024 13:00     Subject: Re:graduated from college but not working.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I can understand for a couple of months but not a full year. I would hate to have him living under my roof while he is perfecting himself. My husband and I worked very hard to put our kids through college and we’d be very direct if one of ours did that.


Us, too. Kids went straight into graduate school or the work force. Perfecting one's body for a year and traveling is not OK. If he had gotten into law school and was deferring for a year, then OK. And I would be seriously worried about his ability to apply and be competitive for a top position after a year out

Sounds like he doesn't want to compete with the type A crowd anyway.


Clearly not.
Passing over on-campus recruiting intakes is a big decision. Oh well.
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2024 12:58     Subject: graduated from college but not working.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Tech companies are still laying off 10-20% of current work forces. So may as well skip town.


Why is the hostility? My DS is also taking a year off to travel before becoming an office drone. Both DW and I are SES in the government, and we have connections to get DS job, either as a Fed or Fed contractor. Not many people will have the opportunity to travel around the world for a whole year. OP's son will be fine in the long run.


Great, get him a similar long term govt job in Club Fed like you.
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2024 11:30     Subject: graduated from college but not working.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The 50k won't last long if he is traveling the world and working on his appearance.

Is he staying at your house in between travels?

Charge rent and run the vacuum at 6:00 am outside is bedroom door every morning.


He and three of his friends will travel to Vietnam and live there for at least six months, where I was born and raised. It costs less than 2K per month per person to live very well in Vietnam. After that, he and his friends will travel to Argentina, where the economy is in pretty bad shape and the US dollars go a long way. I think his 50K savings will go a long way in both Vietnam and Argentina. Yes, he will stay on my insurance and will live with us between travels. I will not provide him with any more money, but I don't know about my wealthy FIL. He has already bought DS a brand new RAV-4 for graduation and paid for his car insurance. He wakes up every morning at 5:30 to go to Lifetime fitness.


That's awesome! He sounds disciplined and motivated. He has the rest of his life to be an office drone.


Motivated how? He is not working out 12 plus hours each day for 365 days. He is a layabout couch potato, the antithesis of motivated. And I would assume a drug addict. Maybe that's a fine lifestyle if you're a trust fund "creative" who will inherit millions, but OP sounds like a normal middle class family.
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2024 11:18     Subject: graduated from college but not working.
Anonymous wrote:Yes, they used to call it backpacking Europe.


Sure, for a few weeks, not 12 months. And often the backpacking was a semester abroad during college or maybe the spring/summer right after graduating. My husband did that after college for a month. Backpacked around SE Asia. There's no valid reason a CS grad from a flagship university can't travel WITH a good remote job paying him at least $75,000 if not upwards of $150,000 depending on his CV.
Anonymous
Post 02/21/2024 17:14     Subject: graduated from college but not working.
Better that than turning 40 with a mortgage, a wife and two kids and flipping out because he feels like he’s spent his whole life in a hamster wheel that he can’t ever get off of.

What a perfect time of life to travel and see the world. When else should he do it?
Anonymous
Post 02/21/2024 17:04     Subject: graduated from college but not working.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The 50k won't last long if he is traveling the world and working on his appearance.

Is he staying at your house in between travels?

Charge rent and run the vacuum at 6:00 am outside is bedroom door every morning.


He and three of his friends will travel to Vietnam and live there for at least six months, where I was born and raised. It costs less than 2K per month per person to live very well in Vietnam. After that, he and his friends will travel to Argentina, where the economy is in pretty bad shape and the US dollars go a long way. I think his 50K savings will go a long way in both Vietnam and Argentina. Yes, he will stay on my insurance and will live with us between travels. I will not provide him with any more money, but I don't know about my wealthy FIL. He has already bought DS a brand new RAV-4 for graduation and paid for his car insurance. He wakes up every morning at 5:30 to go to Lifetime fitness.


That's awesome! He sounds disciplined and motivated. He has the rest of his life to be an office drone.


+1 I wouldn't have a problem with this plan at all. He will come back a more well-rounded person with an appreciation for those two countries.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2024 18:12     Subject: Re:graduated from college but not working.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I can understand for a couple of months but not a full year. I would hate to have him living under my roof while he is perfecting himself. My husband and I worked very hard to put our kids through college and we’d be very direct if one of ours did that.


Us, too. Kids went straight into graduate school or the work force. Perfecting one's body for a year and traveling is not OK. If he had gotten into law school and was deferring for a year, then OK. And I would be seriously worried about his ability to apply and be competitive for a top position after a year out

Sounds like he doesn't want to compete with the type A crowd anyway.


Personally, I wouldn't allow it with my kids. I would worry about reentry. If he already had a job lined up, then OK. Otherwise, NOPE, not when I've sunk so much into undergrad education.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2024 18:07     Subject: Re:graduated from college but not working.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I can understand for a couple of months but not a full year. I would hate to have him living under my roof while he is perfecting himself. My husband and I worked very hard to put our kids through college and we’d be very direct if one of ours did that.


Us, too. Kids went straight into graduate school or the work force. Perfecting one's body for a year and traveling is not OK. If he had gotten into law school and was deferring for a year, then OK. And I would be seriously worried about his ability to apply and be competitive for a top position after a year out

Sounds like he doesn't want to compete with the type A crowd anyway.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2024 12:00     Subject: graduated from college but not working.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The 50k won't last long if he is traveling the world and working on his appearance.

Is he staying at your house in between travels?

Charge rent and run the vacuum at 6:00 am outside is bedroom door every morning.


He and three of his friends will travel to Vietnam and live there for at least six months, where I was born and raised. It costs less than 2K per month per person to live very well in Vietnam. After that, he and his friends will travel to Argentina, where the economy is in pretty bad shape and the US dollars go a long way. I think his 50K savings will go a long way in both Vietnam and Argentina. Yes, he will stay on my insurance and will live with us between travels. I will not provide him with any more money, but I don't know about my wealthy FIL. He has already bought DS a brand new RAV-4 for graduation and paid for his car insurance. He wakes up every morning at 5:30 to go to Lifetime fitness.


That's awesome! He sounds disciplined and motivated. He has the rest of his life to be an office drone.


+1 Who knows? maybe his travels will spark an idea for a business that will also tap his CS skills? This is his time to travel before he's weighed down with too many responsibilities.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2024 07:27     Subject: graduated from college but not working.
Anonymous wrote:Tech companies are still laying off 10-20% of current work forces. So may as well skip town.


Why is the hostility? My DS is also taking a year off to travel before becoming an office drone. Both DW and I are SES in the government, and we have connections to get DS job, either as a Fed or Fed contractor. Not many people will have the opportunity to travel around the world for a whole year. OP's son will be fine in the long run.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2024 01:50     Subject: graduated from college but not working.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The 50k won't last long if he is traveling the world and working on his appearance.

Is he staying at your house in between travels?

Charge rent and run the vacuum at 6:00 am outside is bedroom door every morning.


He and three of his friends will travel to Vietnam and live there for at least six months, where I was born and raised. It costs less than 2K per month per person to live very well in Vietnam. After that, he and his friends will travel to Argentina, where the economy is in pretty bad shape and the US dollars go a long way. I think his 50K savings will go a long way in both Vietnam and Argentina. Yes, he will stay on my insurance and will live with us between travels. I will not provide him with any more money, but I don't know about my wealthy FIL. He has already bought DS a brand new RAV-4 for graduation and paid for his car insurance. He wakes up every morning at 5:30 to go to Lifetime fitness.


That's awesome! He sounds disciplined and motivated. He has the rest of his life to be an office drone.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2024 00:24     Subject: graduated from college but not working.
That actually sounds like a pretty great plan.

Staying in his childhood room playing video games, not cool.

Living in Vietnam and Argentina with friends for a year? Sounds good.

Dont do his laundry or any money. Do give him lots of chores while he is home. Do not make life at home overly comfortable for him. Charge rent if he is thre longer than two weeks at a time.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2024 00:06     Subject: graduated from college but not working.
Tech companies are still laying off 10-20% of current work forces. So may as well skip town.