Anonymous
01/11/2024 07:56
Subject: I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You don’t buy the crib!!!!! OP you are nuts. No wonder the friend and her family are upset!!
What's so special about the crib?
That and stroller/recliner are for family and the bff to get. I mean everyone knows that!
Those items are often bought by the couple themselves because it’s tacky AF to ask people to drop $500 or more on your baby. Yes, even family. If they want to do it, that’s lovely, but putting them on the registry at all is a jerk move.
Anonymous
01/11/2024 07:53
Subject: Re:I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
You didn't overstep, she overreacted. Don't put it on the registry if you don't want your friends to buy it for you. How do you organize a group gift that's on the registry anyway?
Your friend is pregnant, so she gets a pass, but if her family is addressing you directly at all over this, tell them to back all the way off. No apology is needed from your side, but from theirs? Maybe?
This level of drama over someone wishing a baby well is... a lot. Remind them of who the gift is actually for. You should all have that in common.
Your friend is pregnant, so she gets a pass, but if her family is addressing you directly at all over this, tell them to back all the way off. No apology is needed from your side, but from theirs? Maybe?
This level of drama over someone wishing a baby well is... a lot. Remind them of who the gift is actually for. You should all have that in common.
Anonymous
01/11/2024 07:48
Subject: I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
Anonymous wrote:Sorry OP but I think you did overstep in buying the crib. Everyone knows that family buys that stuff.
I’ve never in my life heard that. If it’s in the registry, it’s fair game. OP you need to cut all ties with this acquaintance (who is most definitely not a friend). If the crib has already been delivered then just think of that as a very inexpensive way to cut your losses. If it hasn’t been delivered and you have it, return it and never look back.
I had a friend like this and see how you get sucked in bc the friendship starts off fine and then it slowly becomes one sided. I ended the friendship when the friend and her mother turned awful when I wouldn’t host a bridal luncheon the day before her wedding with very little notice
Anonymous
01/11/2024 07:46
Subject: I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
OP drop this person. They’re not a friend at all. Or do like being a martyr?
Anonymous
01/11/2024 06:44
Subject: I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Is this the same OP that posted about her friend saying a certain wine sounded good and the OP bought a bottle and the friend got pissed?
Yep that was me. Same friend too.
-Op
PP. I knew it when you wrote "They all keep insisting that isn’t the point and shouldn’t have tried to upstage them."
This is your friend's MO. She hints about things (putting this on the registry) then pretends she's mad that you went overboard, but she never declines the gift. I think you also tipped her too much for mailing you something? And she didn't return the money. She makes you feel bad, and then you're even more generous the next time. She's trying to make you feel ashamed, like you're the one who has to apologize to HER for buying her an incredibly generous gift, and now she has her family acting as flying monkeys. Very toxic. I am guessing that you are hosting the shower at your house, so why should she be offended by you spending the money, if she's letting you host her shower which is also something family does? You should call her bluff this time. Return the gift and give her a $20 gift card.
Best response. Call her bluff. End the "friendship" (or sponsorship? idk)
Anonymous
01/11/2024 06:33
Subject: I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
What on earth are you getting out of this friendship?
Anonymous
01/11/2024 06:24
Subject: I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
Truly bizarre. I would not go to the shower. Your friend could have noted "Group Gift" near those items or hidden them from view. This is totally on her.
Anonymous
01/11/2024 01:03
Subject: I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Is this the same OP that posted about her friend saying a certain wine sounded good and the OP bought a bottle and the friend got pissed?
Yep that was me. Same friend too.
-Op
PP. I knew it when you wrote "They all keep insisting that isn’t the point and shouldn’t have tried to upstage them."
This is your friend's MO. She hints about things (putting this on the registry) then pretends she's mad that you went overboard, but she never declines the gift. I think you also tipped her too much for mailing you something? And she didn't return the money. She makes you feel bad, and then you're even more generous the next time. She's trying to make you feel ashamed, like you're the one who has to apologize to HER for buying her an incredibly generous gift, and now she has her family acting as flying monkeys. Very toxic. I am guessing that you are hosting the shower at your house, so why should she be offended by you spending the money, if she's letting you host her shower which is also something family does? You should call her bluff this time. Return the gift and give her a $20 gift card.
Anonymous
01/11/2024 00:57
Subject: I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
Anonymous wrote:Sorry OP but I think you did overstep in buying the crib. Everyone knows that family buys that stuff.
My family of brokies did not buy anything for my baby
Anonymous
01/11/2024 00:56
Subject: Re:I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Your “friend” is both crazy and rude.
She’s pregnant. That’s the literal definition of it. Probably having a boy.
This just got good and I'm here for it.
Anonymous
01/11/2024 00:50
Subject: I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
Anonymous wrote:unless you bought like the crib or something...
Ut oh. Yeah that’s the main gift which SHOULD have come from her family. But they snooze they lose. She can add more stuff.
Anonymous
01/11/2024 00:47
Subject: Re:I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
Anonymous wrote:Your “friend” is both crazy and rude.
She’s pregnant. That’s the literal definition of it. Probably having a boy.
Anonymous
01/11/2024 00:45
Subject: I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
If that’s what you wanted the baby to have then that’s what you wanted the baby to have. Period.
And you can tell the rest of those biddies that you are one of the top friends or the bestie and this is what you are doing.
They can pitch in and give a gift card or something else. She should have created separate registries.
You can admit to overstepping when the child is 2.
And you can tell the rest of those biddies that you are one of the top friends or the bestie and this is what you are doing.
They can pitch in and give a gift card or something else. She should have created separate registries.
You can admit to overstepping when the child is 2.
Anonymous
01/11/2024 00:32
Subject: I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You don’t buy the crib!!!!! OP you are nuts. No wonder the friend and her family are upset!!
What's so special about the crib?
That and stroller/recliner are for family and the bff to get. I mean everyone knows that!
Nobody knows that. You seem oddly invested in this idea that “everyone” must know something that you are just making up.
+1
I never knew that. In fact, a bunch of us gifted a stroller to our friend. She said thank you and that was it
+2
What culture holds those items as family only? In my culture, the registry is where you put gifts of random price points and people can pick ANYTHING on it to gift that they're comfortable giving. Mom to be is grateful for it, from a box of wipes to fancy strollers.
Anonymous
01/11/2024 00:13
Subject: I overstepped and I don’t know how to fix it.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You don’t buy the crib!!!!! OP you are nuts. No wonder the friend and her family are upset!!
What's so special about the crib?
That and stroller/recliner are for family and the bff to get. I mean everyone knows that!
Nobody knows that. You seem oddly invested in this idea that “everyone” must know something that you are just making up.
+1
I never knew that. In fact, a bunch of us gifted a stroller to our friend. She said thank you and that was it
