Anonymous wrote:I had my first at age 30 and 2nd at age 32 and it seems just right to me. I’m almost 40 now and it’s hard to imagine having a baby or toddler at this stage of life—I feel like I had a lot more energy 10 years ago than I do now.

I had my first 2 at 30 and 32 and it really was perfect. I’m now 40 with a 2 year old and can confirm it’s exhausting lol. Wouldn’t change a thing (and I may be tired because I have 3 kids vs my age).

But I definitely would aim to start a family by early 30s if possible.

When you want and can care properly for them.

That will vary enormously by person. The right age for my first was 34 when I had achieved a career level that gave me six months of maternity leave and on-site childcare, as well as a plan to fully fund college.

I’m sure your kid will be thrilled to have student loan repayments hang over them for life so their mom could avoid being an “old mom”.

28-35

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why wait at all? first period, pump them out. That's all women are good for right? (insert eyeroll)

First five of years after onset of puberty or last five years before peri menopause aren't optimal for childbearing. Family planning is a helpful tool for women who want to be productive and professional but also want to do pregnancy, birth and nursing while they are physically in their prime.

Having and raising children is "productive"-especially with our declining birthrate. And careful--you really want to say that a woman with children is not "professional?"

not one of these threads again

Anonymous wrote:They are all bad, but somewhere between 23 and 45 are the best years.

Why are they all "bad?"

30 and 33. Second kid was unplanned (and orignally would have come later). Now I'm in my early 40s and glad that the second one came earlier than planned. I no longer have the energy of my 30's and am thinking more about retirement.

Anonymous wrote:As soon as you are ready - financially, emotionally, with a good partner, etc. Once those are in place no reason to wait. That age might be 26 for one person and 39 for another.

+1 for me that was 33 for our first, 35 with 2nd. We owned a house. I was established enough in my career that I could take a break from FT work and freelance when they were little. Had no trouble finding a FT job at 40. If the kids have their own kids at the same age I did I think I'll still be young enough to be a really engaged grandparent.

The recommended age range for low-risk pregnancies in women is typically from about 20 to 35 years. This age range is generally associated with the highest fertility rates and the lowest risk of complications for both the mother and the baby.

From 20 to 35 Years: This age range is considered optimal for pregnancy. During these years, women usually experience lower risks of complications like gestational diabetes, hypertension, and chromosomal abnormalities in the baby. Fertility is also at its peak during these years, making it a favorable period for childbearing.

Late 30s (specifically after 38 years): Pregnancy after the age of 38 begins to carry increased risks. While many women have healthy pregnancies and babies at this age, the risk of complications, such as chromosomal abnormalities and pregnancy-related health issues, starts to increase more noticeably. It is a period where more careful monitoring and medical attention might be necessary.

40s and Above: Pregnancy at this age is often considered high-risk. The risks of chromosomal abnormalities, miscarriage, and complications like gestational diabetes and pre-eclampsia are significantly higher in this age group. Advanced maternal age also increases the likelihood of requiring medical interventions during pregnancy and childbirth.

It's important to note that these are general guidelines, and individual health conditions and circumstances can vary greatly. Women in their late 30s and 40s can have healthy pregnancies, especially with adequate medical monitoring and prenatal care. However, they are usually counseled about the increased risks and may need more frequent prenatal testing and monitoring. As always, consultation with a healthcare provider is essential for personalized advice and care for women considering pregnancy at any age.

Women should be taught that they don't have to have kids because motherhood isn't a must've just because you have two X chromosomes. Its tough and not for everyone.

Anonymous wrote:40. It was perfect.

no its not

20-32

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:The problem with waiting so long is that you end up being really too old to enjoy being a grandparent. 30s is better for finances, 20s is better for life after kids.

What's with the shaming of teen parents? If you want to have kids at 40 that's fine but no need to be nasty to young mothers who make the difficult decision to keep their babies.

The hate on DCUM seems to be largely reserved for any women who has the temerity to procreate past age 40.

I was pushing 40 when my last one was born, putting me in with the older parents at the school, but there were definitely a few that got into that area where you aren't sure if they are the parent or grandparent. As long as you can keep up the energy level go for it.

I don't plan on looking like a grandparent until I'm 65 so that shouldn't be a problem.

Health conditions aren't under one's control even if you manage to stay fit, get facelifts and dress young.

They are all bad, but somewhere between 23 and 45 are the best years.

Anonymous wrote:Why so so many women think that their lives end when their children are born?

Have a baby 10 years earlier--> 10 years younger when child is grown up.

Lives don't end but become very demanding and complex. However, physical limitations are also to be considered.