Last time I was in the classroom, I had a student act up in my class. He would go to the bathroom throw crayons in the toilet, the other boys would follow him in there, they would make a commotion. I as their teacher literally could not stop this behavior. No consequences worked, if you can imagine this threw a bomb in my classroom. Then that same boy jumped up on a desk, jumped up on the cubby area where you hang backpacks and other behaviors. He threw pencils at students and the last straw was when he started wrestling with another boy during dismissal and bit him. The scary part of all of this as a teacher/mom was the other students could really have gotten hurt from his violent behavior. I was shocked when I tried to call admin to “help” me and they just didn’t do anything and it felt like they didn’t care. It was at that moment when the chilling reality came to me that the admin was more concerned about moving up in their jobs/power than me as a teacher or the student’s safety. As a teacher you can pick up people’s emotions and feelings pretty quickly and I got the sense that I was a problem as a teacher because of this child in my class. So basically if you have a behavior problem child in your class, you as a teacher will be blamed. If you ask for any help, you are a bother and a target is put on you even though it’s not your fault! So that’s why the tough teachers with impeccable management skills and discipline survive.

A mom whose kid was in my upper-elementary grade classroom. Clearly a Munchausens by proxy situation with all her demands, and she’d frequently reference “her attorney” if we pushed back.

I only had to deal with her for 10 months. Kid is saddled with her for the rest of mother’s life, or until kid wisely breaks free.

Admin asking or demanding numbers to be changed then pushing you out the door whether you do or don't do the dirty work then lying to dllr to try to block your unemployment benefits. No respect for teachers. I don't recommend this profession if you value dignity.

If I could distill it down to one thing, the hardest part is that I am not permitted to set and defend my own boundaries. In my life outside of teaching, I can say “I won’t be sworn at,” or “I don’t tolerate sexual
innuendo that is meant to be disrespectful, threatening, or intimidating,” and I can leave the situation or refuse to interact further with the abusive person. In a school environment I’ve had students, parents, and teachers respond “That’s not a reasonable rule,” “This behavior can’t be helped,” “This behavior is a manifestation of the child’s disability,” “What you heard or saw is not what you thought you heard or saw,” “You have to give a second [or 1,322nd] warning before imposing consequences,” and other excuses. There is nothing that exhausts a person more than having your bright lines crossed every day. Eventually you have to stand up for yourself in the only way you have left—by leaving.

As a teacher we used to be able to call security if there was a situation that prevented us from teaching like a kid disrupting class. That is no longer the case for a variety of reasons and we are expected to jump through all sorts of hoops mainly to protect admin from parent and county complaints. With one kid getting away with it now it can be common for other students to engage in similar behavior. Once you get beyond 4 students like this (where you can separate them into the corners of a seating chart) it is very hard to have a stable consistent lesson. It can turn into full time classroom management. Learning suffers, the teacher gets the blame/guilt and burnout increases.

Just look at the COLLEGE parent ranting about rounding up for an 89.55.

Mainly poor parenting and school policies. Schools can’t count on parents to hold kids accountable anymore and admin deals with the nightmare parents. Easiest way to keep parents happy is to loosen the rules. Over 40% of children are coming from single parents now. So, screen use has become cheap daycare. The kids lack coping strategies in all sorts of ways.

Those complaining about teachers not understanding child development have probably not had to deal with 17 years olds throwing screaming tantrums when they are told “no”.

I have taught in several countries (1st world and 3rd world). I roll my eyes at the excuses we make for kid’s poor behavior in this country.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The threat of consequences is what keeps most of the adult population in line so obviously it works well. Speeding will get me a ticket and I don’t want one so I don’t speed. If I do, I owe money.

This says so much about you! I do not live in fear or threat. I drive the speed limit because it's safe, not out of fear. And when I do speed I make a conscious decision to take the risk. I don't commit burglary or murder, not because it's illegal. I don't do it because it goes against my moral compass. It might be hard for you to believe, but some (I believe many) of us are actually good people.

That’s wonderful that you are so enlightened but maybe you should break out of your bubble. Not everyone is following the laws because it goes against their moral compass.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The threat of consequences is what keeps most of the adult population in line so obviously it works well. Speeding will get me a ticket and I don’t want one so I don’t speed. If I do, I owe money.

This says so much about you! I do not live in fear or threat. I drive the speed limit because it's safe, not out of fear. And when I do speed I make a conscious decision to take the risk. I don't commit burglary or murder, not because it's illegal. I don't do it because it goes against my moral compass. It might be hard for you to believe, but some (I believe many) of us are actually good people.

I'm a parent and a teacher....I absolutely do not believe in putting hands on anyone-adult- children- pets. No one should fear the ones they love but should kids know boundaries-yes. Should they understand the word no-yes. Can you each your children in a loving way yes...are my kids perfect no but I'll tell you what.... I've only had one teacher complain about one child in the last 9 years. This child was disrespectful to the teacher-my husband and I sat down with our child and let them know this is not ok-it's disruptive to the class. IF they have a problem with the teacher we need to know and will figure it out together but disrespecting the teacher is not ok. This teacher personally called me to thank me and my child hasn't repeated the disrespect. We did not scream or threaten our child-we connected and told them why it's not ok. Teachers have about 30 students in the room let's not make their job any harder. As a teacher I actually had to sit and listen to a mom tell me how she thinks the school and her husband are ruining her child for telling them "no". She said that we should not squash her daughters personality and thats what the word "no" does to children.....if you are this mom please homeschool. There has to be rules and limits in school for safety and learning to happen. No one is telling you to physically punish your child. I would never do that to my own....but my kids do know and understand the word no and why boundaries are put in place. This is what I mean when I say parent your children.....teach them right from wrong-love them-guide them. Thats how they gain the moral compass. Teachers are there to teach not parent.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The threat of consequences is what keeps most of the adult population in line so obviously it works well. Speeding will get me a ticket and I don’t want one so I don’t speed. If I do, I owe money.

This says so much about you! I do not live in fear or threat. I drive the speed limit because it's safe, not out of fear. And when I do speed I make a conscious decision to take the risk. I don't commit burglary or murder, not because it's illegal. I don't do it because it goes against my moral compass. It might be hard for you to believe, but some (I believe many) of us are actually good people.

When did you put your "In this house we believe" sign in the front yard?

Anonymous wrote:We absolutely need to bring back corporal punishment in schools

No

Anonymous wrote:The threat of consequences is what keeps most of the adult population in line so obviously it works well. Speeding will get me a ticket and I don’t want one so I don’t speed. If I do, I owe money.

This says so much about you! I do not live in fear or threat. I drive the speed limit because it's safe, not out of fear. And when I do speed I make a conscious decision to take the risk. I don't commit burglary or murder, not because it's illegal. I don't do it because it goes against my moral compass. It might be hard for you to believe, but some (I believe many) of us are actually good people.