OP is totally a troll. A 4 yo wrote letter of apology? A 4 yo is privy to what his school report says every day and wants a better school report? As if.

OP - if you are not a troll, your job is to teach your child indoor voice and body boundaries. Roughhousing when others don't want it is not ok at any age.

They are trying to flag potential ADHD for you but they can’t explicitly say it because they’re not doctors. It’s too early to do a whole lot about it even if it turns out to be true, which it may or may not. You got some good suggestions on this thread to try to help him burn off the excess energy. But that’s what this is. Don’t shame him or make him apologize for the extra energy or generalized impulsivity. Tell him what he may do, not what he may not.
-mom of older kids

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You mentioned the apology letters in the past, but do you do anything else? How is he on weekends with other kids? Does he rough house with them ( it's hard to imagine this is a school only trend)? Watch him closely on the playground and step in and correct him when he is being too rough or no letting other kids have turns.

You said you are a teacher so I'm sure you can sympathize with the teachers in this situation. They probably have concerns that other kids will get hurt or don't get to contribute in class.

OP here. I completely sympathize with the teacher! We go to the playground often and his behavior is totally within the realm of normal 4 year old. PPs suggesting my kid doesn’t know how to “treat living beings” are hilarious!!! I was you!! Now I have three boys.

I have three boys and they are not allowed to tackle the dog.

+1. I have threw girls and they would never tackle our toughly touch our dogs. The roughhouse with one another but have appropriate boundaries - so not at school. My eldest is also four and I have twin two year olds. Do not tell me this is a gender thing. This is about appropriate boundaries. OP you sound very invested in your liberal mom with a “real boy” shtick. You voting for Obama does not mean that you get to pull the boys will be boys card. And FYI roughhousing with the dog is a good way for your kid to get bitten. It won’t be as funny when he has a bunch of stitches on his face.

DP. This is utterly absurd. All kids have energy and most boys at 4 are indeed like puppies and like to roughhouse. As long as nobody gets hurt and they all enjoy it, it’s great.

The problem is the school. Teaching kids to observe boundaries is actually the school’s job. If the school cannot handle behavior that is within the range of developmentally normal, it’s a bad school. OP should not waste another second there.

Nope. Sorry. Your job, Mama Bear (and Paoa Bear too, if applicable).

It’s not though. School is not home. The school needs to know how to set boundaries at school. Home can reinforce school behaviors but this school is not engaging at all in a way that would effectuate that connection. You can’t punish a 4 year old for something he did 6 hrs before in a different place - especially when some of that n
behavior doesn’t even seem like it needs a punishment.

This is an inept school bad for your kid OP. Get him out.

It is, though. Kids learn how to behave, including in public, by the direction and boundaries taught by their PARENTS. Ever wonder why this supposedly “inept” teacher isn’t having this problem with all of the other kids in the classmates including the others with with — gasp — XY chromosomes?

Because OP is too busy waving away her kid’s negative (yes, negative) behavior with a litany of excuses.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You mentioned the apology letters in the past, but do you do anything else? How is he on weekends with other kids? Does he rough house with them ( it's hard to imagine this is a school only trend)? Watch him closely on the playground and step in and correct him when he is being too rough or no letting other kids have turns.

You said you are a teacher so I'm sure you can sympathize with the teachers in this situation. They probably have concerns that other kids will get hurt or don't get to contribute in class.

OP here. I completely sympathize with the teacher! We go to the playground often and his behavior is totally within the realm of normal 4 year old. PPs suggesting my kid doesn’t know how to “treat living beings” are hilarious!!! I was you!! Now I have three boys.

I have three boys and they are not allowed to tackle the dog.

+1. I have threw girls and they would never tackle our toughly touch our dogs. The roughhouse with one another but have appropriate boundaries - so not at school. My eldest is also four and I have twin two year olds. Do not tell me this is a gender thing. This is about appropriate boundaries. OP you sound very invested in your liberal mom with a “real boy” shtick. You voting for Obama does not mean that you get to pull the boys will be boys card. And FYI roughhousing with the dog is a good way for your kid to get bitten. It won’t be as funny when he has a bunch of stitches on his face.

DP. This is utterly absurd. All kids have energy and most boys at 4 are indeed like puppies and like to roughhouse. As long as nobody gets hurt and they all enjoy it, it’s great.

The problem is the school. Teaching kids to observe boundaries is actually the school’s job. If the school cannot handle behavior that is within the range of developmentally normal, it’s a bad school. OP should not waste another second there.

I think OP is a troll and also sock-puppetting. No self-respecting parent lets their kids tackle a dog. Even if they don't give a fig about dogs, as many pp's have said, that's a surefire way for a kid to get his face bitten off.

Don’t underestimate the stupidity of these bozos. They’ll simply put the dog down when it snaps at their precious spawn.

And meant to echo what another poster said in Ensuring that these end of the day teacher rants are not taking place in front of your child. Nip that in the bud now.

Anonymous wrote:I would flat out ask them "You say only negative things about DS every day when I pick him up. Do you have anything positive about him you can tell me?"

Maybe they don't realize the impact their words are having. Or, maybe stop asking them every day, especially in front of DS.

This. We also had the biggest kid in the class and grew tired and frustrated by the perpetual complaints. I come from a family of educators and I was raised to always be supportive if the teachers so it was uncomfortable to push back but it got to a point where I had to. Initially I took the complaints seriously and allowed myself to feel the shame they clearly felt comfortable heaping on. But then I reached my limit and started pointing out that they never talked time with kindness about my son, why was that? I would remind them that they are the professionals and asked what they are doing to help the situation. Don't let yourself become a place where they can heap on their end of the day frustrations. You are your son's advocate first and foremost. Ask to observe the class. See how that sits with them. Start talking to them in terms of what your son needs.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You mentioned the apology letters in the past, but do you do anything else? How is he on weekends with other kids? Does he rough house with them ( it's hard to imagine this is a school only trend)? Watch him closely on the playground and step in and correct him when he is being too rough or no letting other kids have turns.

You said you are a teacher so I'm sure you can sympathize with the teachers in this situation. They probably have concerns that other kids will get hurt or don't get to contribute in class.

OP here. I completely sympathize with the teacher! We go to the playground often and his behavior is totally within the realm of normal 4 year old. PPs suggesting my kid doesn’t know how to “treat living beings” are hilarious!!! I was you!! Now I have three boys.

I have three boys and they are not allowed to tackle the dog.

+1. I have threw girls and they would never tackle our toughly touch our dogs. The roughhouse with one another but have appropriate boundaries - so not at school. My eldest is also four and I have twin two year olds. Do not tell me this is a gender thing. This is about appropriate boundaries. OP you sound very invested in your liberal mom with a “real boy” shtick. You voting for Obama does not mean that you get to pull the boys will be boys card. And FYI roughhousing with the dog is a good way for your kid to get bitten. It won’t be as funny when he has a bunch of stitches on his face.

DP. This is utterly absurd. All kids have energy and most boys at 4 are indeed like puppies and like to roughhouse. As long as nobody gets hurt and they all enjoy it, it’s great.

The problem is the school. Teaching kids to observe boundaries is actually the school’s job. If the school cannot handle behavior that is within the range of developmentally normal, it’s a bad school. OP should not waste another second there.

I think OP is a troll and also sock-puppetting. No self-respecting parent lets their kids tackle a dog. Even if they don't give a fig about dogs, as many pp's have said, that's a surefire way for a kid to get his face bitten off.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You mentioned the apology letters in the past, but do you do anything else? How is he on weekends with other kids? Does he rough house with them ( it's hard to imagine this is a school only trend)? Watch him closely on the playground and step in and correct him when he is being too rough or no letting other kids have turns.

You said you are a teacher so I'm sure you can sympathize with the teachers in this situation. They probably have concerns that other kids will get hurt or don't get to contribute in class.

OP here. I completely sympathize with the teacher! We go to the playground often and his behavior is totally within the realm of normal 4 year old. PPs suggesting my kid doesn’t know how to “treat living beings” are hilarious!!! I was you!! Now I have three boys.

Op, you have 3 boys? What are the ages and where does this child fall in the range? He is copying older siblings? Failing to adjust to a new baby?

Starting to think OP is a troll, who really just wants to stir the pot and get validation about young boys tackling dogs and whatever else, and to hear that a couple of books are going to fix this. But in case not--

OP, I have 2 boys. They are incredibly rambunctious, and competitive doesn't begin to cover it. Tackling a dog is NOT "totally within the realm of normal 4 year old" behavior. If kids want to get bitten, among other things, that would be a great way to act. Please, though, tell us where you're seeing tons of 4-yo boys tackling dogs. I must have missed that at the dog park, at our friends' houses (who have dogs), and at our house with 2 dogs. Second, if your kid can handle wrestling with dad without wrestling with everyone else, then great. Sounds like he can't distinguish between dad and small kids, so that would be another thing to change. Third, sounds like this day care is not a great fit, and 7:30 to 4:30 is an awfully long time.

OP you need a combo: tweak things at home, and maybe tweak the daycare. If your son is coming home crying, your defending dog tackling isn't helping. That isn't why he's crying.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You mentioned the apology letters in the past, but do you do anything else? How is he on weekends with other kids? Does he rough house with them ( it's hard to imagine this is a school only trend)? Watch him closely on the playground and step in and correct him when he is being too rough or no letting other kids have turns.

You said you are a teacher so I'm sure you can sympathize with the teachers in this situation. They probably have concerns that other kids will get hurt or don't get to contribute in class.

OP here. I completely sympathize with the teacher! We go to the playground often and his behavior is totally within the realm of normal 4 year old. PPs suggesting my kid doesn’t know how to “treat living beings” are hilarious!!! I was you!! Now I have three boys.

I have three boys and they are not allowed to tackle the dog.

+1. I have threw girls and they would never tackle our toughly touch our dogs. The roughhouse with one another but have appropriate boundaries - so not at school. My eldest is also four and I have twin two year olds. Do not tell me this is a gender thing. This is about appropriate boundaries. OP you sound very invested in your liberal mom with a “real boy” shtick. You voting for Obama does not mean that you get to pull the boys will be boys card. And FYI roughhousing with the dog is a good way for your kid to get bitten. It won’t be as funny when he has a bunch of stitches on his face.

DP. This is utterly absurd. All kids have energy and most boys at 4 are indeed like puppies and like to roughhouse. As long as nobody gets hurt and they all enjoy it, it’s great.

The problem is the school. Teaching kids to observe boundaries is actually the school’s job. If the school cannot handle behavior that is within the range of developmentally normal, it’s a bad school. OP should not waste another second there.

Nope. Sorry. Your job, Mama Bear (and Paoa Bear too, if applicable).

It’s not though. School is not home. The school needs to know how to set boundaries at school. Home can reinforce school behaviors but this school is not engaging at all in a way that would effectuate that connection. You can’t punish a 4 year old for something he did 6 hrs before in a different place - especially when some of that n
behavior doesn’t even seem like it needs a punishment.

This is an inept school bad for your kid OP. Get him out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please do not punish the child and make him apologize for having too much energy on the morning. This is out of his control. Ask the teachers to provide some positive things in thier daily reports. Why can't the teachers give him activities that will tire him out at school. Or provide corrects for these behavior. He's in preschool this is the place to learn and as you said he gets there at 7:30 in the morning!

Kids need consequences for behavior and need to learn. What will happen come k.

What will happen in K if he stays in this preschool that is making no attempt to actually teach him better behaviors?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You mentioned the apology letters in the past, but do you do anything else? How is he on weekends with other kids? Does he rough house with them ( it's hard to imagine this is a school only trend)? Watch him closely on the playground and step in and correct him when he is being too rough or no letting other kids have turns.

You said you are a teacher so I'm sure you can sympathize with the teachers in this situation. They probably have concerns that other kids will get hurt or don't get to contribute in class.

OP here. I completely sympathize with the teacher! We go to the playground often and his behavior is totally within the realm of normal 4 year old. PPs suggesting my kid doesn’t know how to “treat living beings” are hilarious!!! I was you!! Now I have three boys.

I have three boys and they are not allowed to tackle the dog.

+1. I have threw girls and they would never tackle our toughly touch our dogs. The roughhouse with one another but have appropriate boundaries - so not at school. My eldest is also four and I have twin two year olds. Do not tell me this is a gender thing. This is about appropriate boundaries. OP you sound very invested in your liberal mom with a “real boy” shtick. You voting for Obama does not mean that you get to pull the boys will be boys card. And FYI roughhousing with the dog is a good way for your kid to get bitten. It won’t be as funny when he has a bunch of stitches on his face.

DP. This is utterly absurd. All kids have energy and most boys at 4 are indeed like puppies and like to roughhouse. As long as nobody gets hurt and they all enjoy it, it’s great.

The problem is the school. Teaching kids to observe boundaries is actually the school’s job. If the school cannot handle behavior that is within the range of developmentally normal, it’s a bad school. OP should not waste another second there.

Nope. Sorry. Your job, Mama Bear (and Paoa Bear too, if applicable).

What’s PTC?

Anonymous wrote:Please do not punish the child and make him apologize for having too much energy on the morning. This is out of his control. Ask the teachers to provide some positive things in thier daily reports. Why can't the teachers give him activities that will tire him out at school. Or provide corrects for these behavior. He's in preschool this is the place to learn and as you said he gets there at 7:30 in the morning!

Kids need consequences for behavior and need to learn. What will happen come k.

Also adding more outdoor, active playtime to the school schedule couldn't hurt! 45 minutes is nothing at this age. Perhaps you need a different preschool.

Please do not punish the child and make him apologize for having too much energy on the morning. This is out of his control. Ask the teachers to provide some positive things in thier daily reports. Why can't the teachers give him activities that will tire him out at school. Or provide corrects for these behavior. He's in preschool this is the place to learn and as you said he gets there at 7:30 in the morning!