Anonymous
10/19/2023 14:54
Subject: Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:I'm feeling burnt out from working and just want to retire to pursue my hobbies. Maybe I'll try freelancing, but that sounds more stressful than an office job in many ways. What's the smallest nest egg you'd feel comfortable retiring on?
Burnt out at 35? Nonsense. Just take some time off and get a different job.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 12:17
Subject: Re:Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:One spouse retiring early has caused resentment in our marriage. We regret it. YMMV.
Is the retired spouse much older? Have a particularly stressful job? Make most of the nest egg? If so, the resentment may be unwarranted.
If said “retired” spouse is 35 years old like op I’d think the resentment is warranted, regardless of whether they are older than their partner/in a stressful job.
I wasn’t responding to OP. Yes, retiring at 35 without your spouse’s approval isn’t cool. Marriage is teamwork.
OTOH working just to work when you can retire isn't cool. Marriage is teamwork.
Unless spouse can afford to retire too, that’s not teamwork. It’s mooching.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 11:59
Subject: Re:Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP was not talking about retirement; they were talking about quitting work while their spouse keeps working. That's not the same thing.
Is it only retirement if spouses retire together? I’ve never heard that definition.
Quitting work at 35 to rely on spouse's income is also a stretch from the definition of retirement.
+1
I essentially did what OP is proposing when DH got a big promotion, and yes I had built up a healthy nest egg, but I would hardly call it retiring.
+2 Nothing wrong with being a SAHM (I'm one), but stopping working at age 35 isn't retirement.
What would you call it if you don’t have kids at home? It’s certainly not SAHM.
I think this is a good example of what MMM calls “the internet retirement police”.
I’d call it being a housewife. Because there isn’t the capital here necessary to be retired. It’s just quitting.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 11:58
Subject: Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
OP, maybe get a new job.
If you have a job you love, it does not feel like work. For real.
Even if your numbers were great, A LOT can happen between 35 and 85 or whatever your life expectancy is. That’s just too much time for too many things to happen, and many will be totally out of control. So no, this does not sound like a good idea. You do not want to be 55 or 60 and realize you don’t have enough, because there will be no good way at that point to fix it.
If you have a job you love, it does not feel like work. For real.
Even if your numbers were great, A LOT can happen between 35 and 85 or whatever your life expectancy is. That’s just too much time for too many things to happen, and many will be totally out of control. So no, this does not sound like a good idea. You do not want to be 55 or 60 and realize you don’t have enough, because there will be no good way at that point to fix it.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 11:18
Subject: Re:Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP was not talking about retirement; they were talking about quitting work while their spouse keeps working. That's not the same thing.
Is it only retirement if spouses retire together? I’ve never heard that definition.
Quitting work at 35 to rely on spouse's income is also a stretch from the definition of retirement.
+1
I essentially did what OP is proposing when DH got a big promotion, and yes I had built up a healthy nest egg, but I would hardly call it retiring.
+2 Nothing wrong with being a SAHM (I'm one), but stopping working at age 35 isn't retirement.
What would you call it if you don’t have kids at home? It’s certainly not SAHM.
I think this is a good example of what MMM calls “the internet retirement police”.
No, that's not a good example. If both quit at 35 and then took up random small jobs they were interested in it would be an example of retirement police. If one quits at 35 to be supported by a spouse, it's a stay at home spouse.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 10:53
Subject: Re:Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP was not talking about retirement; they were talking about quitting work while their spouse keeps working. That's not the same thing.
Is it only retirement if spouses retire together? I’ve never heard that definition.
Quitting work at 35 to rely on spouse's income is also a stretch from the definition of retirement.
+1
I essentially did what OP is proposing when DH got a big promotion, and yes I had built up a healthy nest egg, but I would hardly call it retiring.
+2 Nothing wrong with being a SAHM (I'm one), but stopping working at age 35 isn't retirement.
What would you call it if you don’t have kids at home? It’s certainly not SAHM.
I think this is a good example of what MMM calls “the internet retirement police”.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 10:36
Subject: Re:Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP was not talking about retirement; they were talking about quitting work while their spouse keeps working. That's not the same thing.
Is it only retirement if spouses retire together? I’ve never heard that definition.
Quitting work at 35 to rely on spouse's income is also a stretch from the definition of retirement.
+1
I essentially did what OP is proposing when DH got a big promotion, and yes I had built up a healthy nest egg, but I would hardly call it retiring.
+2 Nothing wrong with being a SAHM (I'm one), but stopping working at age 35 isn't retirement.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 09:56
Subject: Re:Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP was not talking about retirement; they were talking about quitting work while their spouse keeps working. That's not the same thing.
Is it only retirement if spouses retire together? I’ve never heard that definition.
Quitting work at 35 to rely on spouse's income is also a stretch from the definition of retirement.
+1
I essentially did what OP is proposing when DH got a big promotion, and yes I had built up a healthy nest egg, but I would hardly call it retiring.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 09:52
Subject: Re:Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP was not talking about retirement; they were talking about quitting work while their spouse keeps working. That's not the same thing.
Is it only retirement if spouses retire together? I’ve never heard that definition.
Quitting work at 35 to rely on spouse's income is also a stretch from the definition of retirement.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 09:25
Subject: Re:Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:OP was not talking about retirement; they were talking about quitting work while their spouse keeps working. That's not the same thing.
Is it only retirement if spouses retire together? I’ve never heard that definition.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 08:35
Subject: Re:Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
OP was not talking about retirement; they were talking about quitting work while their spouse keeps working. That's not the same thing.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 08:17
Subject: Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:[youtube]Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am 50 and have 2 million in 401k, 200k Roth and 300k in non-retirement accounts.
DH is 58 and has similar assets, so about 5m total. Paid off home.
250k in 529 for 2 kids 14 and 19.
No family money and no pension.
I am thinking of quiting every day while DH wants to wait till younger DS graduate HS.
We have similar stats but we are a bit younger and our kids are a lot younger. (Had them late in life.) DH is fed, will have a pension, and wants to retire as soon as he is eligible in a couple of years. I am the main breadwinner and want to wait until the youngest graduates high school. My two reasons are: (1) being risk averse and (2) I want to instill good work ethic in my children and have them see us as being productive members of the society.
Not personal since so many people parrot this sentiment, but… what an absolutely asinine take this is. Really.
The first and most obvious logical error is assuming that any job done for pay is automatically good/productive/contributing to society. I whole heartedly reject that premise. Half of jobs are totally useless at best (meaning if those jobs disappeared tomorrow it wouldn’t natter to anyone but the former workers missing their paychecks!). A good chunk of jobs (even well paying ones) are by nature or in practice actively DETRIMENTAL to society. There are not a huge number of jobs that I think one should reasonably be PROUD of continuing to work in despite no longer needing the money.
I think it’s good to model for kids that loved ones come first, which includes their wants and needs, and if society wants to judge someone for retiring early and trying to enjoy their life, they can kick rocks.
Well, I do believe than our jobs are productive and good for the society. YMMV
Ahh I see. So good for society that your husband’s feelings don’t count. If my spouse had his own pension and his own 401(k) and wanted to retire as soon as he was eligible, I would feel like a horrible spouse telling him he can’t because I am “risk averse” or because I think he wouldn’t be setting a good example. YMMV 😉
Key thing is whether your family is dependent on one person working for health insurance IMO. It takes a HUGE cut against any assets so if their plan is to pay for expenses based on the other partner's health insurance, then it's really kind of self-indulgent IMO.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 07:43
Subject: Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:I would love to do the FIRE thing. I could comfortably live on $2k a month while healthy. The thing that keeps me from doing it is long term care. If you have enough money to cover a few years of assisted living, you do not need to live lean when healthy.
elp in
This. My BIL and his wife think they can live frugally now. that might be true. But you need money for what happens when you are really old and need help with every day tasks, you need medical insurance forever (and even medicare costs $ now) and you might need a nursing home. Go visit the state charity one to make suire you are ok with that.
I agree with other posters that there are so many other options at 35 than permanent retirement. Take 6-12 months off or consider a new career. You can always opt into retirement later if it is financially sane and works for your family.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 07:39
Subject: Re:Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:One spouse retiring early has caused resentment in our marriage. We regret it. YMMV.
Is the retired spouse much older? Have a particularly stressful job? Make most of the nest egg? If so, the resentment may be unwarranted.
If said “retired” spouse is 35 years old like op I’d think the resentment is warranted, regardless of whether they are older than their partner/in a stressful job.
I wasn’t responding to OP. Yes, retiring at 35 without your spouse’s approval isn’t cool. Marriage is teamwork.
OTOH working just to work when you can retire isn't cool. Marriage is teamwork.
Anonymous
10/19/2023 07:36
Subject: Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:[youtube]Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am 50 and have 2 million in 401k, 200k Roth and 300k in non-retirement accounts.
DH is 58 and has similar assets, so about 5m total. Paid off home.
250k in 529 for 2 kids 14 and 19.
No family money and no pension.
I am thinking of quiting every day while DH wants to wait till younger DS graduate HS.
We have similar stats but we are a bit younger and our kids are a lot younger. (Had them late in life.) DH is fed, will have a pension, and wants to retire as soon as he is eligible in a couple of years. I am the main breadwinner and want to wait until the youngest graduates high school. My two reasons are: (1) being risk averse and (2) I want to instill good work ethic in my children and have them see us as being productive members of the society.
Not personal since so many people parrot this sentiment, but… what an absolutely asinine take this is. Really.
The first and most obvious logical error is assuming that any job done for pay is automatically good/productive/contributing to society. I whole heartedly reject that premise. Half of jobs are totally useless at best (meaning if those jobs disappeared tomorrow it wouldn’t natter to anyone but the former workers missing their paychecks!). A good chunk of jobs (even well paying ones) are by nature or in practice actively DETRIMENTAL to society. There are not a huge number of jobs that I think one should reasonably be PROUD of continuing to work in despite no longer needing the money.
I think it’s good to model for kids that loved ones come first, which includes their wants and needs, and if society wants to judge someone for retiring early and trying to enjoy their life, they can kick rocks.
Well, I do believe than our jobs are productive and good for the society. YMMV
Ahh I see. So good for society that your husband’s feelings don’t count. If my spouse had his own pension and his own 401(k) and wanted to retire as soon as he was eligible, I would feel like a horrible spouse telling him he can’t because I am “risk averse” or because I think he wouldn’t be setting a good example. YMMV 😉