Its a confusing issue. You want gurls to wear whatever they want but also to be safe and not follow whatever fashion influencers do to get attention.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who cares? Do you allow her to swim? My gosh.

Do you allow your kids to go to restaurants in their swimsuits? My gosh.

+1 some adults are as immature and clueless as kids

It is all about the setting. If she wants to wear a slightly shorter tank top with high-waist shorts to the pool or a BBQ with friends in the summer, I don't care.

School, no freaking way. I have talked to her about how we wear different things for different settings and that our clothes are part of the first impression we give so it's important our clothes be appropriate for the setting. Bathing suits are for the pool. Soccer clothes are for soccer. School clothes, which don't include things that are super short or bare, are for school.

We'll see how this goes though. My parents were super strict about what I could wear and I thought it was so unfair at the time, but in hindsight, I was a size 2 with D boobs at about 12 years old so they were probably onto something.

Show her how Princess Charlotte dresses.

Anonymous wrote:My daughter, seeing the trend in teen girls, now wants to show her midriff. I'm not a fan of this trend or anything that feels like objectifying. At the same time, I want her to be comfortable and happy in what she's wearing. Clearly this isn't about boy attention because she's not into them yet (that would be an easier conversation to have if that were the reason). I'm excited about the cold weather coming, maybe that will help, for now. Any similar experiences with your daughters and how you approached it?

I've no issue with grown women dressing sexy but for protecting young girls, dressing has to be modest until they are smarter enough to spot danger and strong enough to protect themselves.

It doesn't have to be this way but unfortunately world isn't ideal and you would rather be safe than sorry. Also, this is the time for girls to build self-esteem and common sense so they make their own choices in life, not blindly following sex crazed music industry.

Anonymous wrote:It's skin, not a nipple. Stop trying to make this an issue

All mammals have nipples. By your reasoning we shouldn't be concerned about any of it.

Don't be ridiculous. Nobody's 7 yr old should be dressed like a teen.

Anonymous wrote:Who cares? Do you allow her to swim? My gosh.

Do you allow your kids to go to restaurants in their swimsuits? My gosh.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My almost 7yo saw teenagers in the neighborhood wearing crop tops and wanted to do the same. I told her no but I have caught her trying to tie her shirts up high with a scrunchie. I told her she can't go out like that so she doesn't. She tests out all sorts of fashion that she sees- some in the totally opposite direction-- floor length prairie dresses etc. It's not about sexualization in her case, she wouldn't even understand that concept.

Why is she like this?? Is she being abused? This is the kind of behavior that groomed kids display.

Um, she's interested in fashion? She likes playing dress up? If you're a parent yourself I suggest you get your own issues in check before you start freaking out and assuming abuse/grooming over this post.

When I was 7 my mom insisted I wear a turtleneck in the winter even though my friends didn’t have to. I also wasn’t allowed to wear sneakers to school except on PE days. I survived to adulthood relatively unscarred.

Was there good reasoning behind either other than my mom’s quaint ideas about what was proper attire for a 7 year old? Nope, but they were family rules and I just begrudgingly excepted them (and laugh about them with my siblings now). It’s fine just to say “no, I don’t think that’s appropriate attire for a 7 year old” and leave it at that. It does not have to be about body shaming or sexuality.

It's skin, not a nipple. Stop trying to make this an issue

Anonymous wrote:Sorry that none of the PPs have given remotely helpful responses. I opened this thread bc I too have a 7 year old girl and - although this particular issue hasn’t come up - similar things have/will and I wondered how people would approach it in a ‘shut it down but not shaming’ way. Hope some people with helpful advice chime in!

"Nope" is helpful advice, even when it's not the advice you wanted to hear.

Here's my viewpoint . . . it's just some skin, just like your knee or your neck or whatever. Whether it's sexualized is just a function of geography, culture, and time. If you say, eek, no, cover that up, you can only show that when you're X years old, then you are saying a thin strip of stomach skin is sexual. And why is that? Is there actually any rhyme or reason to that other than how you were brought up?

As long as their genitals are covered up and they are adhering to the dress code of wherever we are, then I don't care what my kids wear. Our public schools have done away with dress codes because they were a way of adultifying girls of color and holding girls to a double standard. So yeah, the end result is a lot of short shorts and bare midriffs, but my tweens absolutely do not mean to express themselves in a sexual way at all. They just want to be fashionable and cute.

Now obviously we live in the real world where people have different viewpoints on what is appropriate and what isn't, but that doesn't give other people the right to impose their views on my children unless they are their principals or employers. So I prepare my girls for "those people" . . . if some old man leers at you, just say, "Ew, I'm 11, you're gross." Of course, this has never happened because even disturbed people understand that a 7 year old in a crop top doesn't actually want to be leered at.

A lot of us have been raised in very religious households and have our own hangups about all things sexual, but I think it's on us adults to view those hangups objectively. Are they serving us? Are they serving our kids? Who says one inch of stomach skin is scandalous? Do we want to listen to those people?

Anonymous wrote:Sorry that none of the PPs have given remotely helpful responses. I opened this thread bc I too have a 7 year old girl and - although this particular issue hasn’t come up - similar things have/will and I wondered how people would approach it in a ‘shut it down but not shaming’ way. Hope some people with helpful advice chime in!

There’s no shaming her for wanting something, just explain why she should wait until she’s older. It’s too bad your schools don’t have a dress code. The best private schools have uniforms and when public schools enforce a dress code or a uniform the students do better academically and socially with not as many fights.

Who cares? Do you allow her to swim? My gosh.

My 13 year old hates crop tops, OP. On the other hand she pranced around naked around the house for more years than I care to admit... Maybe she can wear one around the house?