Anybody who’s spent more than 15 min on this site should know that you can never be sure, lol!

Good emotional regulation skills
Fit

I think most people marry men like their dads (or their main male role model). I married someone similar to my dad.

I wanted a hard worker. Laziness truly bothers me. I also wanted someone non argumentative, fun and interesting. I really wanted someone who would be a good dad himself. Somehow I lucked out!

Anonymous wrote:What would make you a good wife, OP? That is equally important to think about, and know what you bring. And you can't say education, job, or money.

💯

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, the number one thing you need to look for is someone who has a track record of maintaining good long term relationships. That is good relationship with parents, siblings, childhood friends, employers.

Yeah Meghan and Harry are both screwed if this is true.

You think? That was well-talked about. They both come from such severe dysfunction.

Anonymous wrote:
Parts hair
Clean beliefs
Collects at least two things
Can ride a bike in dark
Washes all body parts
Preaches common sense
Knows which way the wind is blowing
Eats like he knows you
Loves America



WTF??

What's your damage sister? I said my piece.

Listen to what his friends say about him.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kind, good to his parents, long term job (not a job hopper every year), careful with money, has some long term friends (1 or 2 is okay), generous to help others,
some kind of faith tradition, sense of humor, flexible in outlook

Meh, I don’t care for superstitious people . That is a weird criterion but to each her own.

You need to learn more about faith in God before you make the mistake of calling people superstitious for their faith, but perhaps it's best if you continue to stay away from dating them.

Agreed that is a bad tell. If I believed that I would keep that to myself.

I'll post the things I loved about Dh when I met him (married 25 years):

Hard working and smart and good job
Great cook
Seemed close with his family, parents were married
Loved to travel and had seen the world
Very easy to talk to
Healthy, exercised a lot
Had lots of friends

Now, in truth, I found out over time that not all of these things were as they seemed. For example, I learned after a while that a lot of his friends were super underachievers or highly dysfunctional. And, his mother is highly manipulative.

My advice: don't marry anyone until you've been with them at least 4 years and have interacted with their family many, many times. Things have worked out for us but it could have been really bad. I got married too young, and too fast and I was too clueless.

Know yourself first. Feel comfortable with your relationships with your family and friends. Be able to communicate your needs well, and set boundaries with toxic people in your life who you aren't able to cut ties with. Go to therapy if you had trauma in your childhood.

You can have an exhaustive list of everything to look for in a man, but if you aren't solid your relationship won't work. If you're good with yourself, you'll be able to see past a punch list and click with the right person instead of trying to force something with someone who seems right on paper.

Treats others nicely - if he treats others badly, he’ll eventually do the same to you
Can communicate and is willing to talk through disagreements
Wiling to apologize when he’s wrong

Anonymous wrote:Parts hair
Clean beliefs
Collects at least two things
Can ride a bike in dark
Washes all body parts
Preaches common sense
Knows which way the wind is blowing
Eats like he knows you
Loves America

WTF??

What would make you a good wife, OP? That is equally important to think about, and know what you bring. And you can't say education, job, or money.

The real test of a relationship is are you like this



Or are you like this

OP: look for a man who is not mentally ill, for starters.