DH and I both grew up with SAHMs when we were young (until we were in our teens). My mom went back to teaching and DH's mom started a WFH business.

I have been a SAHM for 19 years. I didn't know what life would serve up so I prepared to have a career by earning an advanced degree and licensure for my profession, but it's not in a particularly lucrative field. Once we had our first kid my salary barely covered daycare so I quit and we started a small WFH business so I could earn some money, but DH was doing so well in his career that we sold it within a couple of years and I've been a SAHM ever since.

At this point, DH will tell anyone who listens that he doesn't want me to work. His job is demanding, we have three children, and he needs me to manage our home and be there for the kids. He appreciates being able to go to work and never getting a phone call about a sick kid, etc. Granted this only works because he makes really good money.

We had kids a little later in life so DH is eyeing retirement as soon as our last kid gets out of high school, so for that reason - baring tragedy - I'm not sure I'll ever work again.

Also times have changed, single income families cant survive and divorces make women more cautious of leaving jobs AND just like there was stigma against working moms, now there is social stigma against SAHM, women rarely get to chose.

Anonymous wrote:Inspired by the maybe troll who wants to be a sah and “submit” to a DH, I’m just really curious — specifically for those who knew as younger women (could say under 28 but maybe more broadly whenever you were in the dating phase), how DID you know you wanted to be a SAHM? Did you grow up with a SAHM? Or you had two working parents that were really stressed?

I’m in my mid thirties, with two kids under 5, and only realized this past year that having two working parents is insanely tiring and stressful. This is also the year that we transitioned from having a full time nanny to having both kids in daycare/preschool full day. I want to be a SAHM now! Or reduce to part time. How did it take me so long to figure this out when others knew much earlier and even before kids?

It doesn't matter. My mon was SAH but my sisters are dedicated career women. I had a MD but decided to retire prematurely and become SAH. My MIL had a career, all four SIL stayed home, one went back after her youngest went to college. All of our daughters are career women but have better balance.

My best friend always wanted to be a SAHM. But she was rich. She had family money that ensured a comfortable life regardless of how her marriage turned out. She eventually became a CPA when her kids were older because she was bored, but she never needed the money.

Anonymous wrote:The SAHM's that I know have very luxurious lives and have kids in school. They travel all over the world and spend a lot of time with girlfriends during the day.

I grew up with a working mom but she had family help with raising us. I cannot fathom going into marriage wanting to be a SAHM but if people have that option and prefer that over working that's their choice.

Why would you prefer to work over traveling the world and having freedom to do as you please?