Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 23:37     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
Anonymous wrote:I have 2 elementary age kids and I have several close friends who don’t have kids, some are single. I can understand and relate to their lives just fine - I was in my mid/late 30s when I got married and had kids.

They cannot understand my life and schedule. That ok, I don’t expect them to.

I enjoy having friends who have hobbies and interests unrelated to kids and kid activities. It allows me to have an identity and a life separate from being a mom.


Sure, if you share hobbies and interests with your childless friends, or if your personalities just click and you enjoy shooting the breeze together, you are not going to let go of them. But if my childless friends were obsessed with their pets or with clubbing every weekend and we had nothing else in common, then I wouldn’t invest time in them.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 23:36     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, as a single, childless woman, I have to say, this is a mean thing to do to people you considered friends.

However, you are not alone. Many of my friends have dropped me once they have kids.

I now consider baby showers to essentially be going away parties for my friendship, because I know there is a good chance my friends will drop me and focus on only having mom friends.

It's pretty mean.


What the everlasting f are you doing on a toddler forum?


For the love of god, why don’t people like you understand that people read the “recent topics” forum? That is the only one I read. And this topic relates to me.


Right, but this is still a forum geared towards parents. It is bizarre that you read and post here. It is deeply, deeply pathetic to frequent a forum for parents when you are childless. Serious question, do your friends who have children know you post on here?


I do wonder about that. Is DCUM meant for parents or does the name need some updating?
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 23:32     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
I have 2 elementary age kids and I have several close friends who don’t have kids, some are single. I can understand and relate to their lives just fine - I was in my mid/late 30s when I got married and had kids.

They cannot understand my life and schedule. That ok, I don’t expect them to.

I enjoy having friends who have hobbies and interests unrelated to kids and kid activities. It allows me to have an identity and a life separate from being a mom.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 23:25     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, as a single, childless woman, I have to say, this is a mean thing to do to people you considered friends.

However, you are not alone. Many of my friends have dropped me once they have kids.

I now consider baby showers to essentially be going away parties for my friendship, because I know there is a good chance my friends will drop me and focus on only having mom friends.

It's pretty mean.


What the everlasting f are you doing on a toddler forum?


For the love of god, why don’t people like you understand that people read the “recent topics” forum? That is the only one I read. And this topic relates to me.


Right, but this is still a forum geared towards parents. It is bizarre that you read and post here. It is deeply, deeply pathetic to frequent a forum for parents when you are childless. Serious question, do your friends who have children know you post on here?
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 22:37     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
I think it's mean to drop your childfree friends just because they can't relate to your parenting challenges. I'm sure there are many challenging aspects to their lives that you can't relate to, either.

Why does having kids suddenly make you one dimensional?
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 22:25     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, as a single, childless woman, I have to say, this is a mean thing to do to people you considered friends.

However, you are not alone. Many of my friends have dropped me once they have kids.

I now consider baby showers to essentially be going away parties for my friendship, because I know there is a good chance my friends will drop me and focus on only having mom friends.

It's pretty mean.


I see how it can feel hurtful, but I don’t see how it’s “mean.” If all OP has the bandwidth to talk about is breastfeeding and sleep training right now, then you and she are not in the same phase of life anymore. I just don’t see how that’s “mean.” Again, indefinitely see how it hurts to lose a friend, but sometimes friends grow apart.


It’s a disloyal, selfish way of viewing friendships. When I make friends with someone, it’s because I care about them as a person. That’s not going to change just make they do or do not have kids. It’s insincere. Basically you used that person for entertainment when you were single and now you are dropping them. It’s shows your view of friendship is shallow and insincere. You weren’t really friends if you don’t enough care about that person to remain friends.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 22:23     Subject: Re:Can't relate to ppl without kids
To the childless lady who has pitched her tent to squat in this thread like a hobo under a bridge-- I suspect many of your friends ditched you when they became parents because it was a convenient and natural excuse. They wanted to cut ties with you much earlier, but you know, your intensity and rage issues pose quite the dilemma.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 22:22     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, as a single, childless woman, I have to say, this is a mean thing to do to people you considered friends.

However, you are not alone. Many of my friends have dropped me once they have kids.

I now consider baby showers to essentially be going away parties for my friendship, because I know there is a good chance my friends will drop me and focus on only having mom friends.

It's pretty mean.


What the everlasting f are you doing on a toddler forum?


For the love of god, why don’t people like you understand that people read the “recent topics” forum? That is the only one I read. And this topic relates to me.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 21:51     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I can’t relate to people without special needs kids anymore. When you’re in the thick of an experience, and it’s an incredibly intense experience, it can be hard to relate to people who aren’t in it with you. I still have friends with typically developing kids or who don’t have kids at all, but honestly they all sound like they are complaining about NOTHING all the time to me, just irrelevant nonsense. I can’t relate.

I think what OP is saying is normal. I’m not sure why people are pouncing on her.


People are pouncing because no one's life should be 100% about being a parent. You need to make yourself think and talk about other things sometimes!

I'm childfree and have friends with kids, but we hardly ever talk about that. They spend time with me because they need time away from their kids and parenting.

OP and PP, I strongly recommend that you cultivate at least one friendship that doesn't revolve around talking about your kids.


Ma'am, what in the everlasting flames of hell are you doing on a parenting forum? SEEK HELP.


Woah, get over it. DCUM has tons of forums that are not about kids. OPs post literally addresses the subject of child free people. You need to get over your rage at people who don't have children. Np.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 21:12     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I can’t relate to people without special needs kids anymore. When you’re in the thick of an experience, and it’s an incredibly intense experience, it can be hard to relate to people who aren’t in it with you. I still have friends with typically developing kids or who don’t have kids at all, but honestly they all sound like they are complaining about NOTHING all the time to me, just irrelevant nonsense. I can’t relate.

I think what OP is saying is normal. I’m not sure why people are pouncing on her.


People are pouncing because no one's life should be 100% about being a parent. You need to make yourself think and talk about other things sometimes!

I'm childfree and have friends with kids, but we hardly ever talk about that. They spend time with me because they need time away from their kids and parenting.

OP and PP, I strongly recommend that you cultivate at least one friendship that doesn't revolve around talking about your kids.


Ma'am, what in the everlasting flames of hell are you doing on a parenting forum? SEEK HELP.


This thread is about people without kids. Read the title.


But I’m sure OP was trying to ask if other parents can relate to this instead of inviting a bunch of angry remarks from childless people lol
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 21:10     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I can’t relate to people without special needs kids anymore. When you’re in the thick of an experience, and it’s an incredibly intense experience, it can be hard to relate to people who aren’t in it with you. I still have friends with typically developing kids or who don’t have kids at all, but honestly they all sound like they are complaining about NOTHING all the time to me, just irrelevant nonsense. I can’t relate.

I think what OP is saying is normal. I’m not sure why people are pouncing on her.


People are pouncing because no one's life should be 100% about being a parent. You need to make yourself think and talk about other things sometimes!

I'm childfree and have friends with kids, but we hardly ever talk about that. They spend time with me because they need time away from their kids and parenting.

OP and PP, I strongly recommend that you cultivate at least one friendship that doesn't revolve around talking about your kids.


I don’t think OP was saying they can ONLY talk about kids. Presumably OP can still talk about other things like the weather or movies or news etc. that’s different from not being able to relate to a childless person…they’re very different lives after all so how does that not make some amount of sense?
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 20:52     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I can’t relate to people without special needs kids anymore. When you’re in the thick of an experience, and it’s an incredibly intense experience, it can be hard to relate to people who aren’t in it with you. I still have friends with typically developing kids or who don’t have kids at all, but honestly they all sound like they are complaining about NOTHING all the time to me, just irrelevant nonsense. I can’t relate.

I think what OP is saying is normal. I’m not sure why people are pouncing on her.


People are pouncing because no one's life should be 100% about being a parent. You need to make yourself think and talk about other things sometimes!

I'm childfree and have friends with kids, but we hardly ever talk about that. They spend time with me because they need time away from their kids and parenting.

OP and PP, I strongly recommend that you cultivate at least one friendship that doesn't revolve around talking about your kids.


Ma'am, what in the everlasting flames of hell are you doing on a parenting forum? SEEK HELP.


This thread is about people without kids. Read the title.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 20:42     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It just means your life is too evolved around your kids. Def not good. You become one of those parents who talk nothing but your kids. Boring as hell. Try to remember no one gives F about your kids other than you.


I mean…my friends and I who have kids around the same age talk about our kids all the time and it’s great to have someone to share that with. Maybe you hate your kids?


Yeah but do you really honestly love hearing them talking about their kids? I think not. You just want to tell them how great your kids are.


Nah I’m not the bragging type. I don’t talk about how great my kids are, I’m usually just explaining issues that have arisen and we brainstorm how to resolve those issues. Or we commiserate about how tough it is being parents.



Sure. I clap you.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 20:42     Subject: Re:Can't relate to ppl without kids
A childless person has sockedpuppeteered 90% of the replies on this thread. LARD, make it make sense.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2023 20:39     Subject: Can't relate to ppl without kids
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I can’t relate to people without special needs kids anymore. When you’re in the thick of an experience, and it’s an incredibly intense experience, it can be hard to relate to people who aren’t in it with you. I still have friends with typically developing kids or who don’t have kids at all, but honestly they all sound like they are complaining about NOTHING all the time to me, just irrelevant nonsense. I can’t relate.

I think what OP is saying is normal. I’m not sure why people are pouncing on her.


People are pouncing because no one's life should be 100% about being a parent. You need to make yourself think and talk about other things sometimes!

I'm childfree and have friends with kids, but we hardly ever talk about that. They spend time with me because they need time away from their kids and parenting.

OP and PP, I strongly recommend that you cultivate at least one friendship that doesn't revolve around talking about your kids.


Ma'am, what in the everlasting flames of hell are you doing on a parenting forum? SEEK HELP.