Anonymous wrote:I have 2019 and 2021 HS grads. 2019 had his own college related issues with shut down, but just graduated with honors and has a job so I consider him a success.

My 2021 had his planned future destroyed as he was an athlete being recruited. Without going into all the details, he actually did land at a college and is playing his sport but not at all where he thought he would be. However, he doesn't seem to regret any of it and he just persevered. He's on track to graduate in four years and I don't think I've ever heard him (or his friends) say anything about being "stuck". Matter of fact, now that I think about it most of his friends seem to be doing well in college and are on track to graduate in 4 years.

I'm sorry for your son's experience, but am glad to hear that he has adjusted.

As a PP mentioned, there is no universal experience for these HS graduating classes. As a parent of three teens during the pandemic, one thing I observed is how much sports outside of school benefited my two, who are more serious athletes. For my other teen, who did not have as much going on outside of school activities, having school buildings shut down had more of a negative impact.

I have 2019 and 2021 HS grads. 2019 had his own college related issues with shut down, but just graduated with honors and has a job so I consider him a success.

My 2021 had his planned future destroyed as he was an athlete being recruited. Without going into all the details, he actually did land at a college and is playing his sport but not at all where he thought he would be. However, he doesn't seem to regret any of it and he just persevered. He's on track to graduate in four years and I don't think I've ever heard him (or his friends) say anything about being "stuck". Matter of fact, now that I think about it most of his friends seem to be doing well in college and are on track to graduate in 4 years.

Anonymous wrote:My DD missed most of middle school. Now, in high school, I think missing those key adolescent years has been problematic in forming relationships- especially with the opposite sex.

How so??

We cannot generalize the 2020 and 2021 experience across the entire generation. Individuals did not have the same experiences. My 2021 grad was in person for a portion of senior year and graduated in person. Freshman year was in person with occasional masking in buildings, testing and one quarantine. But by and large they had a normal experience in that they were on campus living in dorms eating at dining halls attending classes in person and hybrid. As a group of parents with our graduating seniors we acknowledged that it was tough but our kids were fully formed, they had 17-18 years of schooling socializing, they had taken first round ACTs junior year. I think the grades most impacted by covid are late elementary and middle school where according to my teacher spouse the kids are literally 2 years behind in math.

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Anonymous wrote:Mine graduated in 2020 and no. Their school year always ended in May so there were only 8 weeks left in the school year when things shut down. Prom was cancelled and graduation was held in batches that August. They seem fine to me. 2020 kids were also in a good spot to take a gap year without missing out on much if they desired to.

I think it was harder on 2021 kids.

The 2020 kids missed their first year of college, which I think is worse than missing the last year of high school.

Not every 2020 kid missed their first year of college. Thank God our kid was at a Jesuit university that was mostly open with social distancing.

Anonymous wrote:Our 2021 grad wasn’t able to complete a nursing certification she was on track for her senior year and basically gave up. Took a “gap” year that has turned into no plans to enroll in college.

PP, I posted earlier about my 2021 son, who dropped out of college after not really making any friends and doing poorly academically, although he is now back taking courses. I think there are quite a few kids like ours who are falling through the cracks, not being discussed, and not exactly knowing where to turn. One difficulty for kids on this path is that there aren't that many social opportunities for 19/20-year-olds who aren't in college, which further exacerbates isolation. My son's general well-being has improved greatly since he started working at a low pay job in a small department with incredibly nice co-workers. Even though he doesn't socialize that much, these workplace connections have increased his optimism and hope while he works with his therapist on other issues.

What is your DD doing now?

Anonymous wrote:I feel like COVID will be that generation's excuse for anything that crops up in the next few years--be it social, academic or professional.

Some portion of some people's problems may link back to COVID...but that really cannot be known. It is an easier "go to" than believing you need to own your current reality/to try harder or whatever.

Either way they need to move on, given the reality they lived through. Some kids lost their parents. Some kids have fathers in prison. Other grow into adulthood during a war. Or an economic depression. Again, not saying it was not difficult, but it happened and they should be looking ahead not behind.

Depression doesn't work that way

I feel like COVID will be that generation's excuse for anything that crops up in the next few years--be it social, academic or professional.

Some portion of some people's problems may link back to COVID...but that really cannot be known. It is an easier "go to" than believing you need to own your current reality/to try harder or whatever.

Either way they need to move on, given the reality they lived through. Some kids lost their parents. Some kids have fathers in prison. Other grow into adulthood during a war. Or an economic depression. Again, not saying it was not difficult, but it happened and they should be looking ahead not behind.

Depression really seems to have set in this group of kids. I'm still trying to convince my 2020 grad that he should see a psychiatrist, and his life would be easier with medication to help manage chronic depression.

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Anonymous wrote:My 2021 grad is just lamenting the loss of their junior sports season. Still? like did so today. It sucks but as I told him “it is what it is”.

We shouldn't of closed down anything, even if it mean a few more people dying, IMO kids come first.

You clearly needed to be in school that year. It’s “shouldn’t have”.

And hindsight is 20/20. You have to live your life forward.

Anonymous wrote:My 2021 grad is just lamenting the loss of their junior sports season. Still? like did so today. It sucks but as I told him “it is what it is”.

We shouldn't of closed down anything, even if it mean a few more people dying, IMO kids come first.

My 2021 grad is just lamenting the loss of their junior sports season. Still? like did so today. It sucks but as I told him “it is what it is”.

My DS took a gap year and following year only went Part time b/c online was not for him. This year he is full time and lives on campus and really has thrived and found his footing. Everyone's journey is different, what's important is to be supportive of your child.

My DD missed most of middle school. Now, in high school, I think missing those key adolescent years has been problematic in forming relationships- especially with the opposite sex.

I had a 2018 grad and a 2020 grad.

My 2018 grad plays a sport in college and he said the 2020 grad and 2021 grads on his team have many more mental health issues than the rest of the team. Kids from all over, all SESs, went in person .. schools did not shut down.

My 2020 grad, unfortunately, had many medical issues so he is on the 5-6 year plan to graduate. I asked him how it feels, is he worried and he said many friend during 2020 just buckled down and graduated early but many more are on the 5 year plan. He's not worried, even his new friends from the South who went to school in person, many are on the 5 year plan.