Anonymous wrote:How are these kids getting rental houses? Don't most rental houses stipulate that renters must be age 25 and up, and no partying groups? Are parents renting the houses for the kids, then letting the kids break the rules and go without adults? I guess that surprises me.

Anonymous wrote:Remember the Landon dad about 6 years back. Wasn’t he a politician and caught partying/drinking with his son, his friends and a bunch of girls in an OBX house pool.

Parents that do this. Sign and “chaperone” are gross. Living vicariously thru their teenagers. Pretty sick

I also would never host or chaperone. You are setting yourself up to be liable if there is any charges, assaults, etc… Nit to mention any kid can accuse you as well. No thanks!

Anonymous wrote:

Sad thing is that once your daughter has that first drink in the company of a bunch of friends, she’s a target for assault. But you delude yourself into believing, my kid can handle it.

Make sure you at least encourage your daughter to call 911 if she’s raped or assaulted in any way by acquaintance or stranger.

Catastrophize much? Better not send your DD to college because kids party together ALL. THE. TIME. News flash - most of them don't get assaulted.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No permanent mistakes:

1) No arrests
2) No pregnancy and/or STD
3) No addiction
4) No tattoos

A bunch of these aren't actually permanent, you know...

As conditions, maybe not. As mistakes they absolutely are.

Anonymous wrote:How are these kids getting rental houses? Don't most rental houses stipulate that renters must be age 25 and up, and no partying groups? Are parents renting the houses for the kids, then letting the kids break the rules and go without adults? I guess that surprises me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:None of this is helpful to OP. Here you go:

Make use every adult of every student, and every student, has a copy of an emergency contact list with cell numbers for each student and each parent

Make sure every adult has a copy of a list of who is driving to and from the beach with whom

Legal (I am not a lawyer!):

All parties agree to share equally in the costs (rental fee, shared food and beverages)

All parties agree to indemnify and hold harmless all parties from all claims, costs liabilities, loses, damages and expenses, including but not limited to court ot arbitration costs, attorneys fees, etc.

The exception to the above is "you break it, you pay for it" if one parties acts, activities, accidents, negligent or intentional acts cause damage, that person pays

Waiver and release of claims against the rentor (adult who signed lease) for personal injury, bodily harm or death

Rules that all must agree to:
-Buddy system when in the ocean and after dark
-Driving under the influence will not be tolerated - no one gets into a car with someone they know or suspect is under the influence
-no swimming in the ocean after dark
-no going on the roof or jumping off anything
-no cigarettes, vaping, vaping devices, drugs, or fireworks in the house or on the premises
-all must be back in the house for the night by 2am
-no additional guests in the house after 2am/no sleepovers
-no large gatherings/parties at the house
-any guests must follow the rules of the house or will he asked to leave
-guests in common areas of the house only
-no destructive behavior to the house or its contents. If damage occurs an no one claims responsibility, costs will be divided equally among families in the house
-noise levels kept to a minimum
-every morning students must clean up any trash, spills or dishes
-fighting of any kind will not be tolerated and will be grounds for dismissal from the house (no refunds or partial refunds)
--on the last day, all must clean the house until it is in the condition it was upon arrival
-no one leaves without checking in with chaperone to confirm they have cleaned up after themselves and contributed to the overall cleanup efforts of the group, and to confirm to chaperone they are departing for home

You lost every 18yr old by saying buddy system. This is not Girl Scouts.

Also, I personally rather have a bunch of people smoking pot or eating edibles than drinking a bunch of hard liquor. I don't understand parents who think drinking is ok, but smoking a joint is horrific

Don't friends have a secret signal when a someone is bothering them at the bar, friends can run interference? Shouldn't friends make sure everyone gets home okay? This is what the grown up buddy system looks like to me, and I hope my kid and their friends look out for each other.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:None of this is helpful to OP. Here you go:

Make use every adult of every student, and every student, has a copy of an emergency contact list with cell numbers for each student and each parent

Make sure every adult has a copy of a list of who is driving to and from the beach with whom

Legal (I am not a lawyer!):

All parties agree to share equally in the costs (rental fee, shared food and beverages)

All parties agree to indemnify and hold harmless all parties from all claims, costs liabilities, loses, damages and expenses, including but not limited to court ot arbitration costs, attorneys fees, etc.

The exception to the above is "you break it, you pay for it" if one parties acts, activities, accidents, negligent or intentional acts cause damage, that person pays

Waiver and release of claims against the rentor (adult who signed lease) for personal injury, bodily harm or death

Rules that all must agree to:
-Buddy system when in the ocean and after dark
-Driving under the influence will not be tolerated - no one gets into a car with someone they know or suspect is under the influence
-no swimming in the ocean after dark
-no going on the roof or jumping off anything
-no cigarettes, vaping, vaping devices, drugs, or fireworks in the house or on the premises
-all must be back in the house for the night by 2am
-no additional guests in the house after 2am/no sleepovers
-no large gatherings/parties at the house
-any guests must follow the rules of the house or will he asked to leave
-guests in common areas of the house only
-no destructive behavior to the house or its contents. If damage occurs an no one claims responsibility, costs will be divided equally among families in the house
-noise levels kept to a minimum
-every morning students must clean up any trash, spills or dishes
-fighting of any kind will not be tolerated and will be grounds for dismissal from the house (no refunds or partial refunds)
--on the last day, all must clean the house until it is in the condition it was upon arrival
-no one leaves without checking in with chaperone to confirm they have cleaned up after themselves and contributed to the overall cleanup efforts of the group, and to confirm to chaperone they are departing for home

You lost every 18yr old by saying buddy system. This is not Girl Scouts.

Also, I personally rather have a bunch of people smoking pot or eating edibles than drinking a bunch of hard liquor. I don't understand parents who think drinking is ok, but smoking a joint is horrific

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH chaperoned DS and 10 friends (save the judgement) and at the advice of a lawyer friend, he emailed all the parents with his rules and expectations and had them each acknowledge the risks and take responsibility for their own child.

Trip was a success. Boys had "enough" fun. House was not trashed. Husband was exhausted.

Was he the husband that had sex with one of the girls in Corolla last year and SA another? I rather my daughter be in a house without a husband willing to be the fun Dad.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:None of this is helpful to OP. Here you go:

Make use every adult of every student, and every student, has a copy of an emergency contact list with cell numbers for each student and each parent

Make sure every adult has a copy of a list of who is driving to and from the beach with whom

Legal (I am not a lawyer!):

All parties agree to share equally in the costs (rental fee, shared food and beverages)

All parties agree to indemnify and hold harmless all parties from all claims, costs liabilities, loses, damages and expenses, including but not limited to court ot arbitration costs, attorneys fees, etc.

The exception to the above is "you break it, you pay for it" if one parties acts, activities, accidents, negligent or intentional acts cause damage, that person pays

Waiver and release of claims against the rentor (adult who signed lease) for personal injury, bodily harm or death

Rules that all must agree to:
-Buddy system when in the ocean and after dark
-Driving under the influence will not be tolerated - no one gets into a car with someone they know or suspect is under the influence
-no swimming in the ocean after dark
-no going on the roof or jumping off anything
-no cigarettes, vaping, vaping devices, drugs, or fireworks in the house or on the premises
-all must be back in the house for the night by 2am
-no additional guests in the house after 2am/no sleepovers
-no large gatherings/parties at the house
-any guests must follow the rules of the house or will he asked to leave
-guests in common areas of the house only
-no destructive behavior to the house or its contents. If damage occurs an no one claims responsibility, costs will be divided equally among families in the house
-noise levels kept to a minimum
-every morning students must clean up any trash, spills or dishes
-fighting of any kind will not be tolerated and will be grounds for dismissal from the house (no refunds or partial refunds)
--on the last day, all must clean the house until it is in the condition it was upon arrival
-no one leaves without checking in with chaperone to confirm they have cleaned up after themselves and contributed to the overall cleanup efforts of the group, and to confirm to chaperone they are departing for home

You lost every 18yr old by saying buddy system. This is not Girl Scouts.

Also, I personally rather have a bunch of people smoking pot or eating edibles than drinking a bunch of hard liquor. I don't understand parents who think drinking is ok, but smoking a joint is horrific

No Fentanyl in vodka.

Anonymous wrote:

Sad thing is that once your daughter has that first drink in the company of a bunch of friends, she’s a target for assault. But you delude yourself into believing, my kid can handle it.

Make sure you at least encourage your daughter to call 911 if she’s raped or assaulted in any way by acquaintance or stranger.

Catastrophize much? Better not send your DD to college because kids party together ALL. THE. TIME. News flash - most of them don't get assaulted.

Anonymous wrote:I agree that unenforceable contracts and rules are not realistic AT ALL but some of the safety guidance mentioned is really helpful. Instilling the sense of responsibility for their actions and to look out for their friends, too, is so important. I think it's a good idea to give concrete examples like always use the buddy system, talking with friends ahead of time about external/overnight guests, etc. These are good life skills. I have thought of some of the ones mentioned, but not others. So, thank you (sincerely).

Sad thing is that once your daughter has that first drink in the company of a bunch of friends, she’s a target for assault. But you delude yourself into believing, my kid can handle it.

Make sure you at least encourage your daughter to call 911 if she’s raped or assaulted in any way by acquaintance or stranger.