Re: CCR communities, it's not about needing the motivation, it's the money those places cost. Those places are expensive and extremely expensive in the DMV. Fine it you have so much money that you don't need to care if you're there 10 years vs 20 years, vs 25 years. It's a lot of money. Again, fine if the extra money, of 10-15 more years of living there, isn't going to worry you. That's not a worry I want at 65 or 70.

DH and I are in our early 60s, and we still have the 5-bedroom suburban home where we raised our 4 kids. We have a master bedroom & bath on the main floor, all wheelchair accessible. The only rooms upstairs are guest rooms which we keep for visiting kids and grandkids-to-be.

My mom, who's in her mid-80s, still lives in my childhood home about 1 mile away. She has a mechanical seat for the stairway, since her bedroom is upstairs, but she could easily stay in a downstairs bedroom if she chose to do so. She spends her days cooking elaborate meals, puttering around in her garden, and spending time with family.

We have plans to move my mom in with us if/when the time comes, so that's another reason to keep our large SFH.

Anonymous wrote:I am 62. DH is 60 and still working. We aren't even thinking about moving till his mom and my father die. They are both 95.

And where will you probably move?

I am 62. DH is 60 and still working. We aren't even thinking about moving till his mom and my father die. They are both 95.

Our primary bed and bath are on the main floor. Everything we need is on the main floor, so we don't have to use the stairs for anything important. There are many (most?) days where I don't venture upstairs.

There's nowhere else we'd rather live. If that changes, we'll move. But I won't be surprised if we stay here until the end.

I responded earlier but the choices aren't just 1) stay in house with a lot of stairs or 2) move to 55+ community

You can move to a one-level house (or at least a house with a bedroom and full bath on the first floor). Or move to a one-level condo in a walkable neighborhood.

Anonymous wrote:We moved out of DC area to a 55+ gated community in FL for 2 years. That was 10 years ago.

We love it. Bike or beach walk everyday. Play Pickleball or tennis. Swim. Always in sunshine. Eat healthy, don’t drink alcohol, in bed by 9ish and watch the sun rise over the ocean. We raised some great humans and adore our grandkids. We’re not going back.

We do have friends who stay in the (paid off) house they raised the kids in. Change is hard. So is cleaning out all the STUFF.

Florida? Florida?

Anonymous wrote:We moved out of DC area to a 55+ gated community in FL for 2 years. That was 10 years ago.

We love it. Bike or beach walk everyday. Play Pickleball or tennis. Swim. Always in sunshine. Eat healthy, don’t drink alcohol, in bed by 9ish and watch the sun rise over the ocean. We raised some great humans and adore our grandkids. We’re not going back.

We do have friends who stay in the (paid off) house they raised the kids in. Change is hard. So is cleaning out all the STUFF.

You realize you will still have to do that, right, when you age out of this community. They are just houses, no medical services, and you will have a lot of stuff then, too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The one you've been in, whether it is a TH or SFH, and have no plans to move right now, what are your reasons?

We are always asked "why not move to a one level or over 55 development?"

We live in a regular suburban area, all ages, kids, but also plenty of people over 65 way into late 70s. Original owners, but we aren't. We've been here about 20 years.
We are not infirmed, we have several pets, retired, happy here. There's no reason to go, not now at least. I'm not saying never, but why is it assumed? There are pressing reasons we would definitely move, but it's not imminent. I think our next move will be in our 80s- continual care. That's about 18 years at least.

It's hard to move at 80. Also things can change very suddenly. My father went from riding a bike to work everyday at 70 to skilled nursing at 75. Thankfully my parents had moved to continuing care in between. When he passed she was settled with friends and support.

Yeah,but 80 is appropriate to move to a CCC, not really 70.

The point is you have to move before there is a problem. Finding the right place and moving while dealing with a big medical issue is awful.

My mother refers to "the window"--when you are old enough to move to a senior place but young/healthy enough to make the move and associated decisions on your own. Mercifully (and with some prodding from me), she and my dad moved during the window and it has worked out very well. But she worries about friends who miss "the window."

What type of place does your mother think is appropriate at 65? And what would that solve in terms of problems?

Anonymous wrote:We moved out of DC area to a 55+ gated community in FL for 2 years. That was 10 years ago.

We love it. Bike or beach walk everyday. Play Pickleball or tennis. Swim. Always in sunshine. Eat healthy, don’t drink alcohol, in bed by 9ish and watch the sun rise over the ocean. We raised some great humans and adore our grandkids. We’re not going back.

We do have friends who stay in the (paid off) house they raised the kids in. Change is hard. So is cleaning out all the STUFF.

No, no over 55 communities for me.
Never never never Florida. Never, and more never.
Also, would prefer to be near our family.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The one you've been in, whether it is a TH or SFH, and have no plans to move right now, what are your reasons?

We are always asked "why not move to a one level or over 55 development?"

We live in a regular suburban area, all ages, kids, but also plenty of people over 65 way into late 70s. Original owners, but we aren't. We've been here about 20 years.
We are not infirmed, we have several pets, retired, happy here. There's no reason to go, not now at least. I'm not saying never, but why is it assumed? There are pressing reasons we would definitely move, but it's not imminent. I think our next move will be in our 80s- continual care. That's about 18 years at least.

It's hard to move at 80. Also things can change very suddenly. My father went from riding a bike to work everyday at 70 to skilled nursing at 75. Thankfully my parents had moved to continuing care in between. When he passed she was settled with friends and support.

Yeah,but 80 is appropriate to move to a CCC, not really 70.

The point is you have to move before there is a problem. Finding the right place and moving while dealing with a big medical issue is awful.

My mother refers to "the window"--when you are old enough to move to a senior place but young/healthy enough to make the move and associated decisions on your own. Mercifully (and with some prodding from me), she and my dad moved during the window and it has worked out very well. But she worries about friends who miss "the window."

We moved out of DC area to a 55+ gated community in FL for 2 years. That was 10 years ago.

We love it. Bike or beach walk everyday. Play Pickleball or tennis. Swim. Always in sunshine. Eat healthy, don’t drink alcohol, in bed by 9ish and watch the sun rise over the ocean. We raised some great humans and adore our grandkids. We’re not going back.

We do have friends who stay in the (paid off) house they raised the kids in. Change is hard. So is cleaning out all the STUFF.

OP here.

We will be staying. We are mid sixties, and healthy, however we know older people become unhealthy. Having said that, many of my neighbors either broke their legs, had cancer or developed autoimmune issues in their 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, etc., so age doesn't immediately mean near death.
Our house isn't large, it's a smallish SFH with a small yard.
We have 3 dogs, so condo living isn't going to be a thing.
We aren't hoarding stuff. We purge often. We walk everyday and have friends here, all ages. When my inlaws and parents declined in late 80s, we of course moved them. Look, we were overseas at one point and didn't even pack our own stufff, but we moved several times since then and know how to.
We are not in denial, we didn't raise our kids here, we don't love stuff.
I think moving is personal due to circumstances, but, no, there isn't any real reason to but ourselves in some over 55 box because there are those opportunities. No one there is 55, anyway. They are older. A CCRC is not at all appropriate at our age.
Thanks! Good luck to all.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, my parents are in their mid-60s and I can't imagine them moving into a retirement community. My dad's passion is gardening, he was so excited to retire to do more of it, and he has massive vegetable garden a nice flower and herb garden, and built another big vegetable garden next to his church that they plant and harvest to donate to the food bank. Their house is cleaner and in better shape than mine.

They don't have the physical stamina of their 40s but they're not exactly in the their twilight years yet; their elders have either dropped dead around 80 or are/were still going into their 90s.

Yes, 60s is fine. But, a lot of people really start to slow down when they hit their mid/late70s. The point is that you want to make the move before you *need* to make the move.

Agreed. We were surprised at the aging that happened around age 75 for our six relatives close to that age. Two entered independent living a little before 75. Both were considered young by those already living there, but they had individual health reasons that made it a good choice. Another couple entered independent living around 75. Within a few years, one's health issues worsened to that point that we're glad they're in a continuing care retirement community. Two others still live independently at home, but both have health issues that we're keeping an eye on. All had relatives who lived long lives, some until their 90s and even past 100, so we weren't necessarily expecting they'd have health issues already.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The stairs keep me healthy/strong. And we’ve lived here 25 years, love our neighborhood and neighbors. Why move unless we have to? Plus, for the amount of our mortgage payment, we’d get half the space in today’s market, whether a rental or new purchase.

That's exactly what my ILs said until they couldn't handle it. Then they were forced to move. At some point, you won't be able to handle it. I think the consensus is to move before you hit that stage when it's harder to move.

I'm not saying you should move when you are 60. But, I think before 72 is a good time.

It's what my mom said before she tripped and broke a hip falling in them. Wheel chair after that.