Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There have been anonymous allegations that administration knew about babysitting/driving, but no actual proof or any credible non-anonymous claims. That would be damning if it were true, but at this point, all we have are anonymous assertions.

He had been supplying the boys with alcohol. Anyone who believes no one on the school staff had a clue is naive, to say the least. He forced the boys to run naked in the park. He had showers with the boys.

And you believe that he was doing these things in the view of, and with the knowledge of, other staff members? Not that he had taken steps to conceal his actions? That seems… unlikely.

Look, when a successful bastion of privilege like Gilman has something awful like this happen, the schadenfreude is real and rampant. But the truth is that it could happen anywhere, and has, and will. If someone actually has knowledge that the school was aware of it before they reported him, of course, that’s culpable. But I haven’t heard anything but people saying that they “must have known”. No, abusers don’t abuse out in the open, and they take measures to conceal their actions. I will blame Gilman if it turns out that they verifiably didn’t know about it and didn’t protect students, or if their response is tepid and down plays the severity of what happens. Neither of these has happened (yet?)

Anonymous wrote:the school is holding a virtual town hall tomorrow night to talk about the issue. sounds underwhelming.

Really? I don't think so. What would you have them do? This way, the school can communicate directly and hear concerns from the whole school community. Not sure what makes this so underwhelming.

the school is holding a virtual town hall tomorrow night to talk about the issue. sounds underwhelming.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There were two other cases of abuse at the school. One from 1950 and one from 1990. it’s a really wonderful school but this story is just so awful. We as a community are devastated.

This. And not just a wonderful school but a small one, so everyone knows everyone. So my heart goes out to the person who was able to step forward, and help this story come to an end. And I am so sad to think that someone my son probably knew, had to experience this. I hope he gets to keep his anonymity, until or unless he doesn't want to. Not sure how that works but kid, whoever you are, I admire you and I wish you the best. Mom hugs to you.

In cases like this one, there is often more than one victim. It is heartbreaking, and must have taken a lot of courage to come forward.

I think as a parent, this makes me want to know how we can better protect our kids against these kind of predators. This guy must have been pretty "nice" on the surface to gain the kids' trust. I think kids and adults kind of expect for there to be more obvious warning signs.

Kids know which teachers are “creepy” or “weird”. Adults tend to ignore the “rumors” just because they haven’t seen the clear evidence of rape.

He was actually PROVIDING alcohol to the students on the weekends!!!

Successful predators often don’t come across as creepy or weird, at least not until they already have the victim in their clutches. I wouldn’t let my kid near an obviously creepy dude but the point is that we need to teach kids that there are boundaries that are totally inappropriate even if the adult doesn’t seem creepy at all.

I disagree. I tend to think children have been indoctrinated to criticize no one, no matter what. Huge mistake, people.

I would never allow a man to come babysit my children because yes, it’s creepy. I haven’t been indoctrinated to pretend otherwise.

Anonymous wrote:There have been anonymous allegations that administration knew about babysitting/driving, but no actual proof or any credible non-anonymous claims. That would be damning if it were true, but at this point, all we have are anonymous assertions.

He had been supplying the boys with alcohol. Anyone who believes no one on the school staff had a clue is naive, to say the least. He forced the boys to run naked in the park. He had showers with the boys.

[quote=Anonymous]Right it is anonymous but I think it is just going to be a slow bleed with this one, the lawyer was already quoted saying there are other victims etc. I think a lot will come out over time. Hopefully anyone who knew anything or was involved in any part of this is held accountable. [/quote]

The lawyer is the same one that represented Chessy Prout vs St Paul’s in New Hampshire and helped her devise the strategy of revealing her own identity as someone with nothing to be ashamed of when the school threatened to “out” her publicly when she pursued civil charges against them for knowingly not protecting underclass girls from the sexual predations of the “Senior Salute”

If there are more charges and/or the administration had some inkling of what was going on, this will bring down the headmaster. I don’t think their first couple public statements were at all effective and now it already feels like they’ll be having to issue more statements to bolster the original ones. Time to hire a crisis communications firm if they haven’t already

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There were two other cases of abuse at the school. One from 1950 and one from 1990. it’s a really wonderful school but this story is just so awful. We as a community are devastated.

This. And not just a wonderful school but a small one, so everyone knows everyone. So my heart goes out to the person who was able to step forward, and help this story come to an end. And I am so sad to think that someone my son probably knew, had to experience this. I hope he gets to keep his anonymity, until or unless he doesn't want to. Not sure how that works but kid, whoever you are, I admire you and I wish you the best. Mom hugs to you.

These comments are why this is so disturbing.. as part of the community , if I get one more communication or talk to someone that is "saddened" or "devastated" it is making me loose my mind.. how about ENRAGED .. ANGER... UNACCEPTABLE this is a complete establishment failure , we have been at the school only a few years and this is the THIRD news worthy incident.. institutional changes need to be made.

Yes, there was the one in the 1950s, and the one in the 80s (a teacher who is sadly there until the early 2000s), and now this. It’s terrible, but it’s not like it there have been three incidences in the past few years.

I do think they are taking this extremely seriously, as shown by the fact that they fired him before he was even charged.

And tragically, it’s everywhere.
McDonough: https://www.cbsnews.com/baltimore/news/mcdonogh-school-investigation-reveals-5-former-faculty-members-engaged-in-sexual-misconduct-with-24-students/
Friends: https://www.baltimoresun.com/maryland/baltimore-city/bs-md-baltimore-friends-school-investigation-teacher-misconduct-20190711-q7fsr2xn6zdh3kazhbn4kxfuh4-story.html
Calvert Hall: https://www.bishop-accountability.org/news2005_01_06/2005_06_16_TheWBALChannel_CalvertHall.htm

And lest you think that it’s a private school thing,
https://baltimorebrew.com/2021/04/05/students-at-baltimore-school-for-the-arts-share-stories-of-sexual-harassment-and-abuse-on-instagram/
http://www.daggerpress.com/2010/12/20/baltimore-teacher-charged-with-sexual-abuse-of-15-year-old-bel-air-boy/

Etc etc etc.

I wish it hadn’t been so easy to find all those examples, but it took a matter of minutes. I don’t think Gilman is any less safe than any other school. If anything, I think they are on high alert, and have been since those two earlier incidences.

I mean, the members of the administration who reviewed the 1990s abuse allegations just a few years ago surely could have noticed similarity between Mr. Bendan’s babysitting and chauffeuring kids around and Malloy’s conduct two decades earlier. Even if they didn’t, they should have realized it violated the code of conduct adopted thereafter. And when we are talking about babysitting, it really wasn’t that, it was a single man staying with middle and upper school age kids while their parents were out of town.

Not just Baltimore either. Sidwell, Maret, St Albans, Deale have all had incidents.

https://www.fox5dc.com/news/transparency-questioned-in-dc-schools-sexual-abuse-cases.amp

https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/education/dcs-maret-school-releases-investigation-detailing-past-cases-of-sexual-abuse-at-the-private-school/2019/09/19/faf5ec21-826d-4873-8037-3008ec19b14e_story.html

https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/some-men-identified-in-washington-national-cathedral-report-on-sexual-misconduct-were-criminally-charged-in-other-cases/2019/06/28/f8766d1c-99a0-11e9-b503-8e101553431a_story.html

https://www.cecildaily.com/news/sidwell-friends-teacher-charged-with-child-sex-abuse/article_8bfac4f5-1655-523e-af83-3799127e2bec.html

Right it is anonymous but I think it is just going to be a slow bleed with this one, the lawyer was already quoted saying there are other victims etc. I think a lot will come out over time. Hopefully anyone who knew anything or was involved in any part of this is held accountable.

Anonymous wrote:There have been anonymous allegations that administration knew about babysitting/driving, but no actual proof or any credible non-anonymous claims. That would be damning if it were true, but at this point, all we have are anonymous assertions.

Because this is an anonymous board.

There have been anonymous allegations that administration knew about babysitting/driving, but no actual proof or any credible non-anonymous claims. That would be damning if it were true, but at this point, all we have are anonymous assertions.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There were two other cases of abuse at the school. One from 1950 and one from 1990. it’s a really wonderful school but this story is just so awful. We as a community are devastated.

This. And not just a wonderful school but a small one, so everyone knows everyone. So my heart goes out to the person who was able to step forward, and help this story come to an end. And I am so sad to think that someone my son probably knew, had to experience this. I hope he gets to keep his anonymity, until or unless he doesn't want to. Not sure how that works but kid, whoever you are, I admire you and I wish you the best. Mom hugs to you.

These comments are why this is so disturbing.. as part of the community , if I get one more communication or talk to someone that is "saddened" or "devastated" it is making me loose my mind.. how about ENRAGED .. ANGER... UNACCEPTABLE this is a complete establishment failure , we have been at the school only a few years and this is the THIRD news worthy incident.. institutional changes need to be made.

Yes, there was the one in the 1950s, and the one in the 80s (a teacher who is sadly there until the early 2000s), and now this. It’s terrible, but it’s not like it there have been three incidences in the past few years.

I do think they are taking this extremely seriously, as shown by the fact that they fired him before he was even charged.

And tragically, it’s everywhere.
McDonough: https://www.cbsnews.com/baltimore/news/mcdonogh-school-investigation-reveals-5-former-faculty-members-engaged-in-sexual-misconduct-with-24-students/
Friends: https://www.baltimoresun.com/maryland/baltimore-city/bs-md-baltimore-friends-school-investigation-teacher-misconduct-20190711-q7fsr2xn6zdh3kazhbn4kxfuh4-story.html
Calvert Hall: https://www.bishop-accountability.org/news2005_01_06/2005_06_16_TheWBALChannel_CalvertHall.htm

And lest you think that it’s a private school thing,
https://baltimorebrew.com/2021/04/05/students-at-baltimore-school-for-the-arts-share-stories-of-sexual-harassment-and-abuse-on-instagram/
http://www.daggerpress.com/2010/12/20/baltimore-teacher-charged-with-sexual-abuse-of-15-year-old-bel-air-boy/

Etc etc etc.

I wish it hadn’t been so easy to find all those examples, but it took a matter of minutes. I don’t think Gilman is any less safe than any other school. If anything, I think they are on high alert, and have been since those two earlier incidences.

I mean, the members of the administration who reviewed the 1990s abuse allegations just a few years ago surely could have noticed similarity between Mr. Bendan’s babysitting and chauffeuring kids around and Malloy’s conduct two decades earlier. Even if they didn’t, they should have realized it violated the code of conduct adopted thereafter. And when we are talking about babysitting, it really wasn’t that, it was a single man staying with middle and upper school age kids while their parents were out of town.

Oh wow, if these details on the "baby"sitting are true, they are damning on a bunch of different levels.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There were two other cases of abuse at the school. One from 1950 and one from 1990. it’s a really wonderful school but this story is just so awful. We as a community are devastated.

This. And not just a wonderful school but a small one, so everyone knows everyone. So my heart goes out to the person who was able to step forward, and help this story come to an end. And I am so sad to think that someone my son probably knew, had to experience this. I hope he gets to keep his anonymity, until or unless he doesn't want to. Not sure how that works but kid, whoever you are, I admire you and I wish you the best. Mom hugs to you.

These comments are why this is so disturbing.. as part of the community , if I get one more communication or talk to someone that is "saddened" or "devastated" it is making me loose my mind.. how about ENRAGED .. ANGER... UNACCEPTABLE this is a complete establishment failure , we have been at the school only a few years and this is the THIRD news worthy incident.. institutional changes need to be made.

Yes, there was the one in the 1950s, and the one in the 80s (a teacher who is sadly there until the early 2000s), and now this. It’s terrible, but it’s not like it there have been three incidences in the past few years.

I do think they are taking this extremely seriously, as shown by the fact that they fired him before he was even charged.

And tragically, it’s everywhere.
McDonough: https://www.cbsnews.com/baltimore/news/mcdonogh-school-investigation-reveals-5-former-faculty-members-engaged-in-sexual-misconduct-with-24-students/
Friends: https://www.baltimoresun.com/maryland/baltimore-city/bs-md-baltimore-friends-school-investigation-teacher-misconduct-20190711-q7fsr2xn6zdh3kazhbn4kxfuh4-story.html
Calvert Hall: https://www.bishop-accountability.org/news2005_01_06/2005_06_16_TheWBALChannel_CalvertHall.htm

And lest you think that it’s a private school thing,
https://baltimorebrew.com/2021/04/05/students-at-baltimore-school-for-the-arts-share-stories-of-sexual-harassment-and-abuse-on-instagram/
http://www.daggerpress.com/2010/12/20/baltimore-teacher-charged-with-sexual-abuse-of-15-year-old-bel-air-boy/

Etc etc etc.

I wish it hadn’t been so easy to find all those examples, but it took a matter of minutes. I don’t think Gilman is any less safe than any other school. If anything, I think they are on high alert, and have been since those two earlier incidences.

I mean, the members of the administration who reviewed the 1990s abuse allegations just a few years ago surely could have noticed similarity between Mr. Bendan’s babysitting and chauffeuring kids around and Malloy’s conduct two decades earlier. Even if they didn’t, they should have realized it violated the code of conduct adopted thereafter. And when we are talking about babysitting, it really wasn’t that, it was a single man staying with middle and upper school age kids while their parents were out of town.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There were two other cases of abuse at the school. One from 1950 and one from 1990. it’s a really wonderful school but this story is just so awful. We as a community are devastated.

This. And not just a wonderful school but a small one, so everyone knows everyone. So my heart goes out to the person who was able to step forward, and help this story come to an end. And I am so sad to think that someone my son probably knew, had to experience this. I hope he gets to keep his anonymity, until or unless he doesn't want to. Not sure how that works but kid, whoever you are, I admire you and I wish you the best. Mom hugs to you.

These comments are why this is so disturbing.. as part of the community , if I get one more communication or talk to someone that is "saddened" or "devastated" it is making me loose my mind.. how about ENRAGED .. ANGER... UNACCEPTABLE this is a complete establishment failure , we have been at the school only a few years and this is the THIRD news worthy incident.. institutional changes need to be made.

Yes, there was the one in the 1950s, and the one in the 80s (a teacher who is sadly there until the early 2000s), and now this. It’s terrible, but it’s not like it there have been three incidences in the past few years.

I do think they are taking this extremely seriously, as shown by the fact that they fired him before he was even charged.

And tragically, it’s everywhere.
McDonough: https://www.cbsnews.com/baltimore/news/mcdonogh-school-investigation-reveals-5-former-faculty-members-engaged-in-sexual-misconduct-with-24-students/
Friends: https://www.baltimoresun.com/maryland/baltimore-city/bs-md-baltimore-friends-school-investigation-teacher-misconduct-20190711-q7fsr2xn6zdh3kazhbn4kxfuh4-story.html
Calvert Hall: https://www.bishop-accountability.org/news2005_01_06/2005_06_16_TheWBALChannel_CalvertHall.htm

And lest you think that it’s a private school thing,
https://baltimorebrew.com/2021/04/05/students-at-baltimore-school-for-the-arts-share-stories-of-sexual-harassment-and-abuse-on-instagram/
http://www.daggerpress.com/2010/12/20/baltimore-teacher-charged-with-sexual-abuse-of-15-year-old-bel-air-boy/

Etc etc etc.

I wish it hadn’t been so easy to find all those examples, but it took a matter of minutes. I don’t think Gilman is any less safe than any other school. If anything, I think they are on high alert, and have been since those two earlier incidences.

On high alert - but they missed Chris Bendann abusing at least one boy for a period of YEARS? Isn't that an inconsistent statement?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There were two other cases of abuse at the school. One from 1950 and one from 1990. it’s a really wonderful school but this story is just so awful. We as a community are devastated.

This. And not just a wonderful school but a small one, so everyone knows everyone. So my heart goes out to the person who was able to step forward, and help this story come to an end. And I am so sad to think that someone my son probably knew, had to experience this. I hope he gets to keep his anonymity, until or unless he doesn't want to. Not sure how that works but kid, whoever you are, I admire you and I wish you the best. Mom hugs to you.

These comments are why this is so disturbing.. as part of the community , if I get one more communication or talk to someone that is "saddened" or "devastated" it is making me loose my mind.. how about ENRAGED .. ANGER... UNACCEPTABLE this is a complete establishment failure , we have been at the school only a few years and this is the THIRD news worthy incident.. institutional changes need to be made.

Yes, there was the one in the 1950s, and the one in the 80s (a teacher who is sadly there until the early 2000s), and now this. It’s terrible, but it’s not like it there have been three incidences in the past few years.

I do think they are taking this extremely seriously, as shown by the fact that they fired him before he was even charged.

And tragically, it’s everywhere.
McDonough: https://www.cbsnews.com/baltimore/news/mcdonogh-school-investigation-reveals-5-former-faculty-members-engaged-in-sexual-misconduct-with-24-students/
Friends: https://www.baltimoresun.com/maryland/baltimore-city/bs-md-baltimore-friends-school-investigation-teacher-misconduct-20190711-q7fsr2xn6zdh3kazhbn4kxfuh4-story.html
Calvert Hall: https://www.bishop-accountability.org/news2005_01_06/2005_06_16_TheWBALChannel_CalvertHall.htm

And lest you think that it’s a private school thing,
https://baltimorebrew.com/2021/04/05/students-at-baltimore-school-for-the-arts-share-stories-of-sexual-harassment-and-abuse-on-instagram/
http://www.daggerpress.com/2010/12/20/baltimore-teacher-charged-with-sexual-abuse-of-15-year-old-bel-air-boy/

Etc etc etc.

I wish it hadn’t been so easy to find all those examples, but it took a matter of minutes. I don’t think Gilman is any less safe than any other school. If anything, I think they are on high alert, and have been since those two earlier incidences.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I don’t understand why he wasn’t fired until Jan 20. Why did the school wait so long??

Do you have information that they knew about the abuse before then?

He was fired before or after getting charged?

Before. They reported him to the police and CPS.