Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And every day some other expense doubles or increases by 10-20%. WWYD? I am 50 and don't own a home.

I’ll bite. I’m a single parent and I make $230. I understand what you’re saying about the constant increases. Everyone is feeling that. But I’m choosing to stuff money into my retirement accounts. I know where my money is going. I wish I had enough to have the amount of disposable income I think I should have in my brain. But as long as I make the choice to save it, I don’t get to spend it today. So Op—where are you spending your money?

$30K/year to retirement
That leaves $198 pretax
After retirement, taxes, FSA, health insurance premium I see $4660 biweekly.
So $9K/month.
$3K to rent
$60 water + $70 electric + $60 WiFi + $60/m subscriptions + $100 cellphone
$800 groceries + $100 pharmacy
$200 gas + $100 car insurance + $100 parking. Car is paid off.
$700 student loans
$400 supplemental disability insurance
$1000 combined summer camp, vacation & annual travel
That leaves ~$2K for school needs (public school), babysitters, entertainment, clothing & shoes, books, health care co-pays and deductible, gifts, sports for kids, accountant, special services like lawyer or financial advisor when needed, car repairs, computer equipment/office supplies, haircuts, pet food/care & vet bills, home goods, gym/exercise (no gym membership), and everything else.
I barely leave home or shop, have no cable/TV/landline am somehow living paycheck to paycheck apart from the retirement savings.

Two issues:

1) The "I can't save much after saving $30K for retirement" line is a little trite. $30K per year growing at 8% per year for 35 years becomes $5.8M (or $2M+ in present-day dollars). That's a lot of savings. If you want access to some of it now, reduce pre-tax contributions and contribute instead to a Roth IRA or taxable account.

2) How do you go from $198K left after retirement contributions to a take-home pay of $108K? Assuming an effective tax rate of 30%, you're paying $60K in taxes. Where's the other $30K going? Health insurance isn't that expensive.

OP miscalculated. Take home is actually $121K
Still, she's paying more than she should in taxes and probably getting a refund.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is more than our two-parent household made for the first six years we had kids. There is a lot that is definitely much harder for single parents, but in this case, I'm not sure that your income is the main problem.

Okay what do you think is the main problem?

I don't know, and I don't really care to read through this whole thread to develop an opinion. I just know that having raised kids for six years earning less money than $228,000 a year, it is definitely possible to do on that income.

So why even comment if you’re not going to read the thread replies or add anything of value?

I commented on the first page of what, by the time I went back to see someone answering my post, had become 4 pages.

Sorry, that should be, commented WHILE READING the first page.

Yeah, I don't get "I'm living paycheck to paycheck" when you are saving 30k/year on retirement. If you want more spending money, you can save less for retirement. But lots of people choose to maximize their retirement savings instead. It's a sacrifice now in order to not have to worry later.

Are you worried about retirement? It honestly sounds like you are in good shape. If you work for another 12-15 years, you are golden. You have enough money now to take vacations, spend well on food and housing for you and your kids. Who needs cable? I'm sure if you decided you really wanted cable or something else in that range, you could adjust your spending a bit to make it work. You actually have tons of wiggle room in your budget (like just take cheaper vacations one year and you can spend that money however you want without changing your retirement contributions, this isn't rocket science).

Are you worried about college costs? That's reasonable, although your kids are actually more likely to get need-based aid with a single parent who doesn't own a home, even though your income is high. How many kids do you have? Are you in DC or MD/VA? Lots of state school options in MD/VA and DC Tag will help if in DC. And, again, that's a one time cost. It's a big one, but you just have to figure it out and then it's over. How many kids do you have? When will they be in college?

I just don't see what the issue is. You have disposable income. You have allocated it according to your priorities. You are well off but not rich.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is more than our two-parent household made for the first six years we had kids. There is a lot that is definitely much harder for single parents, but in this case, I'm not sure that your income is the main problem.

Okay what do you think is the main problem?

I don't know, and I don't really care to read through this whole thread to develop an opinion. I just know that having raised kids for six years earning less money than $228,000 a year, it is definitely possible to do on that income.

So why even comment if you’re not going to read the thread replies or add anything of value?

I commented on the first page of what, by the time I went back to see someone answering my post, had become 4 pages.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And every day some other expense doubles or increases by 10-20%. WWYD? I am 50 and don't own a home.

I’ll bite. I’m a single parent and I make $230. I understand what you’re saying about the constant increases. Everyone is feeling that. But I’m choosing to stuff money into my retirement accounts. I know where my money is going. I wish I had enough to have the amount of disposable income I think I should have in my brain. But as long as I make the choice to save it, I don’t get to spend it today. So Op—where are you spending your money?

$30K/year to retirement
That leaves $198 pretax
After retirement, taxes, FSA, health insurance premium I see $4660 biweekly.
So $9K/month.
$3K to rent
$60 water + $70 electric + $60 WiFi + $60/m subscriptions + $100 cellphone
$800 groceries + $100 pharmacy
$200 gas + $100 car insurance + $100 parking. Car is paid off.
$700 student loans
$400 supplemental disability insurance
$1000 combined summer camp, vacation & annual travel
That leaves ~$2K for school needs (public school), babysitters, entertainment, clothing & shoes, books, health care co-pays and deductible, gifts, sports for kids, accountant, special services like lawyer or financial advisor when needed, car repairs, computer equipment/office supplies, haircuts, pet food/care & vet bills, home goods, gym/exercise (no gym membership), and everything else.
I barely leave home or shop, have no cable/TV/landline am somehow living paycheck to paycheck apart from the retirement savings.

Two issues:

1) The "I can't save much after saving $30K for retirement" line is a little trite. $30K per year growing at 8% per year for 35 years becomes $5.8M (or $2M+ in present-day dollars). That's a lot of savings. If you want access to some of it now, reduce pre-tax contributions and contribute instead to a Roth IRA or taxable account.

2) How do you go from $198K left after retirement contributions to a take-home pay of $108K? Assuming an effective tax rate of 30%, you're paying $60K in taxes. Where's the other $30K going? Health insurance isn't that expensive.

Anonymous wrote:I feel your pain OP. People are so out of touch with reality. 228K for a single parent is not that much.
I can relate because I'm a single parent as well. I'm making 350k and it's very tight. Everything is so expensive.

LOL WHAT

Anonymous wrote:To the PP, she'd be eligible for SSDI, plus she must have some retirement savings and she is already 50 (and can withdraw at 55 from her employer account if she leaves at 55). $400 a month is almost $5000 a year, not to mention the interest ,for something she probably won't need.

Well, as someone whose husband gets SSDI I can tell you that it isn't very much money. The MAXIMUM benefit is $3600 a month. And it is also hard to qualify for.

If you are so disabled you cannot work, your expenses go UP not DOWN unfortunately.

But yes, $400 a month is very high for disability insurance. If OP is a fed, there's actually FERS Disability retirement which is easier to get than SSDI.

12K a year spent on vacations. You are living a good life. Why are you complaining?

$4660 biweekly is 10K a month not 9K as you calculated.
That's another 12K a year that you have available.

You have 2K + 1K every month left after covering your necessary expenses + vacation & travel.
That's 36K a year. That's plenty for entertainment, clothes, etc...

I get it. A part of you feels like at $230k you should be able to live large. But in reality, you are just living.

If I were you I'd dump the long-term care insurance. I don't have it because I feel like if I'm need that kind of care, I don't really want to be alive. I know other folks think differently.

I'd also take a hard look at expenses and see where I want to spend more and where I can spend less, and I'd spend on my priorities and cut back on other things. And I'd accept that I'm not wildly rich, even though when I was 20 I thought anyone making that much must be rich. And then I'd think about all of the wonderful things I do have in my life, and go hug my kids.

Those are the things I'd do. Good luck.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is more than our two-parent household made for the first six years we had kids. There is a lot that is definitely much harder for single parents, but in this case, I'm not sure that your income is the main problem.

Okay what do you think is the main problem?

I don't know, and I don't really care to read through this whole thread to develop an opinion. I just know that having raised kids for six years earning less money than $228,000 a year, it is definitely possible to do on that income.

So why even comment if you’re not going to read the thread replies or add anything of value?

Anonymous wrote:LOL. DH and I make just over $200k and have kids in private school. What is the issue here?

No one cares about your parochial school. Oh, and you forgot to mention your parents or in-laws subsidizing the rest of your existence.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have your kid 24/7? If not, can you pick up a side gig when they aren’t t with you? I have my kid 24/7 but once he got old enough to leave alone for a few hours, I started tutoring (I’m a teacher). Now I tutor and work as a driver for a busy family who has lots of kids and needs help getting kids to/from activities.

See isn't living paycheck to paycheck, she is living very comfortably by any reasonable standard. I don't see how consuming her free time (which is probably little given she is a single parent) with a side gig would improve her quality of life unless the side gig was something she'd really enjoy as a hobby.

Teacher again. The side gig isn’t meant to improve the quality of her life. Lol. It’s meant to pay the bills which she says she is struggling with. Whether she is or isn’t is beside the point. She either needs to make more money or needs to cut her spending.

DH and I make the exact same income as OP together (split fairly evenly) and 1) I am not complaining but 2) it certainly doesn’t feel *easy*. We are putting closer to 60k/year into retirement, since there are two of us and I get a good employer match. So that’s a bigger minus from our bottom line. On the plus side, our kids are teens so we are done with childcare.

The biggest difference is that I look at your what you’re spending and saving and I think you’re doing pretty well. You seem to think you’re not. I think it’s more a matter of looking at what it is about your life—stress level, free time, etc—that’s making you feel discontented. I bet it’s not really the money, exactly.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the point is someone making $228K should not be living paycheck to paycheck and OP basically is, just bc of the housing timing, student loans, and inflation.

Not sure what housing has to do with it. Her rent is 3K. That's what her mortgage would be if she owned a house. Owning a home wouldn't increase her cash flow. She would build equity, yes. But that's not her problem right now.

Bc rent will continue to increase.

So will the cost of home repairs and upkeep though.

She's doing just fine with $3k a month rent. She also doesn't have to pay RE taxes, saving $5-15k a year.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is more than our two-parent household made for the first six years we had kids. There is a lot that is definitely much harder for single parents, but in this case, I'm not sure that your income is the main problem.

Okay what do you think is the main problem?

I don't know, and I don't really care to read through this whole thread to develop an opinion. I just know that having raised kids for six years earning less money than $228,000 a year, it is definitely possible to do on that income.