Anonymous wrote:Support your dad.

Support his cheating on her mom in a public fashion? No way.

I'm not reading this whole thing, but, maybe he is curious? I would not tell your mom. Your cousin needs to MYOB.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP

How in the world is this your business?

Stay out of your parent's bedroom. What is wrong with you he is an adult!

God your parents failed.

NP. You're b*tsh*t crazy.

Dad's making a public ass of himself.

Mom has a right to know.

Your moral compass needs major adjustment.

+1 PP is bananas. What is up with this site lately?

Anonymous wrote:Support your dad.

WTF. Why should she? Her dad is married to her mom. He is not single.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How about just talk to him first?

My Dad is an angry person that doesn't respond to even gentle confrontation well. But I can try.

Now you have some incite as to a possible reason why he is an angry person.

Anonymous wrote:Maybe add in the cousin found it? So he knows his siblings may find out…

Definitely this.

"Dad, cousin googled your name and a dating profile came up. I'm staying out of your business, but I want to make sure you know what comes up when people Google you. "

Let him save face regarding the trans stuff.

My husband's dad is gay. If we'd known for certain before his wife died, I'm not sure if dh would have told her. Probably not...I have a feeling she suspected it as much as we did but didn't want to disrupt her home life.

Fil still hides it from us. His partner of the past 5 years knows we know, yet we're still pretending they're just roommates because fil isn't ready to come out. He's 80 years old btw.

I think it's super hard for this age group.

You said your dad had an affair before and your mom knew. She likely knows about this. Why do you think they'd discuss it with you? It's their private business. Tell him or not, but you're prying into his personal life and you know he won't react well. Also, if he's 70, he's probably not getting much action, either playing the field or with your mom. I mean, 70 isn't dead, but it's not exactly the most sexually active age either.

It's okay to be trans. If anyone judges him, that's their hangup. At 70, he must be close to retirement, so how much could it impact his business?

What do you hope to accomplish by discussing this with your father?

Anonymous wrote:I think it is someone who dislikes him trying to prank him. I’ve known some juvenile co-workers when I was in my 20s who totally would do this kind of thing to a higher up that was kind of an a-hole.

The second most likely scenario is that he is trans or trans curious and your mom knows.

It’s a PRANK. No one would be stupid enough to use their real name in the profile.

What's motivating your anger and disgust: a) that he is cheating on your mom, b) that he is cross-dressing and attracted sexually to trans women, c) that your cousin found out and might tell others, or d) all of the above?

I can understand A and C. I can see how B would be a shock. Would you feel the same anger and disgust if he was doing this on a straight site? I think it's worth parsing out what your feelings are really about, and then take it from there.

Your elderly dad wants to let his freak flag fly. Fine. What's not fine is that he might be cheating on your mom. Maybe she knows, either consciously or subconsciously, about his sexual preferences. If you want to talk to him, and knowing his anger and depression, take the advice of PPs and talk to him in as calm as a manner as you can, and try not to shame him for whatever his sexual preferences are.

Anonymous wrote:OP

How in the world is this your business?

Stay out of your parent's bedroom. What is wrong with you he is an adult!

God your parents failed.

NP. You're b*tsh*t crazy.

Dad's making a public ass of himself.

Mom has a right to know.

Your moral compass needs major adjustment.

Anonymous wrote:OMG just get to the point:

Dad: your real name, pictures, etc are associated with a transgender website looking for hookups. Deal with it.
Also, you're telling Mom or I am. She has a right to know her husband is out there trolling. That part of this entire thing disgusts me.

This^^^

Support your dad.

Why was your cousin on that site? Are they transgender?

Are you sure his identity of another social media profile hasn’t been hacked?

Aside from that, let it be. 70 year old parents aren’t as stupid or naive as people want to think their parents are. These are people who came of age during the free love, free music, free cocaine, free everything times. Fretting about his place in his macho field (whatever that means - oil riggers?) at this point in just so silly.

If you want to help, then pull him aside quietly and ask him privately, without judgement, and with the intent to protect him. Maybe he HAS been hacked. Maybe he doesn’t know the dangers of using his own name on dating sites.

OP

How in the world is this your business?

Stay out of your parent's bedroom. What is wrong with you he is an adult!

God your parents failed.