Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fiancé of many years?

OP here.

I’m 48 soon to be 49. Our youngest is 7. We’ve been engaged 7 1/2 years. I have a 12 year old and a 15 year old. His two older children are 27 and 25.

You are crazy to be engaged this long. If he would not marry you 7 years ago, you should have left them. You do not have any marital assets and have lived with him for 7 years!?? Where is your brain?

+1 Your DH must take care of your shared child, but he is not responsible for your other children. Where is the father of your other two children? Were you responsible for his children? No, right?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:His kids should inherit. It's not their fault Dad left the marriage.

A house is rarely considered an inheritance. You live there, you sell it, and that pays for your nursing home.

?? All 4 of dh's and my sets of grandparents had houses when they died that were left to heirs. A lot of people never go into nursing homes. Blessedly ours had good, long lives and then relatively quick declines (<3mo).

Anonymous wrote:I guess I’m the lone dissenter but I think he sounds like a jerk. My spouse put me on everything even though she made twice as much money as me and would be paying more towards it. We couldn’t get married legally until 2013 ( gay marriage) you need to have a serious conversation with him, if gd won’t get married or put you on the title you need to consider your next steps. Either stay and be ok with it, or leave..

did one of you have adult children from a previous marriage? If not, then it's not the same.

My DH put me on his vacation home when we got engaged, but neither of us had any children that we wanted to leave stuff to, and we were both employed FT. Plus, we bought a house together -- I paid for half the down payment.

Very different scenarios to OP.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fiancé of many years?

OP here.

I’m 48 soon to be 49. Our youngest is 7. We’ve been engaged 7 1/2 years. I have a 12 year old and a 15 year old. His two older children are 27 and 25.

Hahaha. You're not engaged.

+1
you aren't engaged, you are just living together
Engagement leads to marriage and it's clear you aren't getting married.
You could get married pretty quickly - in the next few days actually.
You need to either do that or start planning for your own future. You aren't doing it with him bc you aren't married to him.

Anonymous wrote:Why aren't you married to him, sugar?

He is smart. You don't pay the mortgage, you aren't on the loan. You must've missed thread by a husband few days ago - they are 6 months behind on mortgage, I guess facing foreclosure, and he can't modify loan because he was dumb and put wife on deed. She isn't on the loan, but she won't agree to modify. Her credit will remain untarnished while burning his.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a suggestion: have him put the house that you and your child w him live in into a trust and amend the directive to say you have a right to reside there until your child leaves college or whatever age if your fiancé dies.

OP here. Thank you for this advice. I am going to see what he thinks.

You need to see an attorney OP.

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a suggestion: have him put the house that you and your child w him live in into a trust and amend the directive to say you have a right to reside there until your child leaves college or whatever age if your fiancé dies.

OP here. Thank you for this advice. I am going to see what he thinks.

Anonymous wrote:His kids should inherit. It's not their fault Dad left the marriage.

A house is rarely considered an inheritance. You live there, you sell it, and that pays for your nursing home.

His kids should inherit. It's not their fault Dad left the marriage.

What a POS...

At or after age 50, with multiple kids, it becomes much more difficult to find a new relationship with a reliable suitable man if the relationship you are currently in ends.

If you haven't worked throughout your life, you probably won't have much of any social security benefit. If you were married you could be eligible for a spousal benefit or survivor benefit.

So it is imperative OP you get some kind of full time job as soon as possible and plan on staying with it at least until full retirement age so you at least have a social security benefit when you are unable to work any longer.

As far as being on the house title, maybe where you live, you could qualify as a domestic partner and have some leverage that way. You need to consult a family law attorney pronto.

This sounds like an arrangement. You clean, cook, plan, shop, and take care of his kid and in exchange, you get to live in his house.

Get a FT job, move out, and collect child support. Also ensure he shares custody too.

Voila, I fixed your problem, now you get to live like a responsible 50 y/o.
Are your older kids his?

How come ypu don’t have your own house at 50.

How old is your child? You should be working FT.

A man is not a plan.