Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cartier love bracelets are actually $6k+ closer to 7k. The basic gold one with no diamonds. And that was years ago, I imagine they are more now. They are classic, hold their value, and the symbolism is special to me, and probably is for your wife too. If you can afford it, get it. It doesn’t have to mean you are raising the bar— you can set the expectation that this is a milestone anniversary and knew she wanted this, and that you agree with the symbolic nature (if you do), but also most gifts going forward won’t be this $$$$

OP has already purchased a gift, but this would be my position too. DH gifted me a Love bracelet as a push present and I love it, no matter how much DCUM despises spending on jewelry/clothes/push presents.

Ironically, our 5 year anniversary is also coming up soon. Our limit is $100 each year, according to the theme, but I would hardly judge someone who chose to spend more commemorating each year of their marriage.

What is a push present like a tip or a service charge?

If it was just a tip, PP wouldn’t be in that postion.

we splurged (for us) on 5 years with a night away and a babysitter. We went to philly and went to the art museum, the barnes as well and a great restaurant and drinks. We also had two kids under 3. but no material gifts.

We are now at 13 years and that was the only night away we have had without our kids since then. We are dropping them at sleep away camp this summer and finally getting a few days away to ourselves! Sorry I digress, but for us anniversaries are not about material gifts, just the time to spend together reminding us why we intially got married.

Anonymous wrote:Cartier love bracelets are actually $6k+ closer to 7k. The basic gold one with no diamonds. And that was years ago, I imagine they are more now. They are classic, hold their value, and the symbolism is special to me, and probably is for your wife too. If you can afford it, get it. It doesn’t have to mean you are raising the bar— you can set the expectation that this is a milestone anniversary and knew she wanted this, and that you agree with the symbolic nature (if you do), but also most gifts going forward won’t be this $$$$

Five years is in no way a milestone anniversary.
- Married 43 years

You both sound shallow and overly brand conscious.

I think you should have gotten the Cartier bracelet as a milestone anniversary gift given your income. But I also think the wood art sounds meaningful and very thoughtful, and as a wife I would treasure it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cartier love bracelets are actually $6k+ closer to 7k. The basic gold one with no diamonds. And that was years ago, I imagine they are more now. They are classic, hold their value, and the symbolism is special to me, and probably is for your wife too. If you can afford it, get it. It doesn’t have to mean you are raising the bar— you can set the expectation that this is a milestone anniversary and knew she wanted this, and that you agree with the symbolic nature (if you do), but also most gifts going forward won’t be this $$$$

OP has already purchased a gift, but this would be my position too. DH gifted me a Love bracelet as a push present and I love it, no matter how much DCUM despises spending on jewelry/clothes/push presents.

Ironically, our 5 year anniversary is also coming up soon. Our limit is $100 each year, according to the theme, but I would hardly judge someone who chose to spend more commemorating each year of their marriage.

What is a push present like a tip or a service charge?

PP and I’m just now seeing this. Per our contract, it was structured like a service charge. So my budget was $1k per pound of the baby’s birth weight. I plan to negotiate for $1500 a pound for our next child - Graff wont pay for itself - I’ve read that women need to be more aggressive in negotiating.

What is a push present like a tip or a service charge?

NP. Are you this miserable IRL? Giving your wife a gift after she gestates your child for 9 months and then goes through delivery and its aftermath is thoughtful and loving. If someone can afford to do it and wants to recognize their spouse like that, what's your problem with it? I'm guessing your problem is you didn't get one or didn't think to give one.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cartier love bracelets are actually $6k+ closer to 7k. The basic gold one with no diamonds. And that was years ago, I imagine they are more now. They are classic, hold their value, and the symbolism is special to me, and probably is for your wife too. If you can afford it, get it. It doesn’t have to mean you are raising the bar— you can set the expectation that this is a milestone anniversary and knew she wanted this, and that you agree with the symbolic nature (if you do), but also most gifts going forward won’t be this $$$$

OP has already purchased a gift, but this would be my position too. DH gifted me a Love bracelet as a push present and I love it, no matter how much DCUM despises spending on jewelry/clothes/push presents.

Ironically, our 5 year anniversary is also coming up soon. Our limit is $100 each year, according to the theme, but I would hardly judge someone who chose to spend more commemorating each year of their marriage.

What is a push present like a tip or a service charge?

Anonymous wrote:Cartier love bracelets are actually $6k+ closer to 7k. The basic gold one with no diamonds. And that was years ago, I imagine they are more now. They are classic, hold their value, and the symbolism is special to me, and probably is for your wife too. If you can afford it, get it. It doesn’t have to mean you are raising the bar— you can set the expectation that this is a milestone anniversary and knew she wanted this, and that you agree with the symbolic nature (if you do), but also most gifts going forward won’t be this $$$$

OP has already purchased a gift, but this would be my position too. DH gifted me a Love bracelet as a push present and I love it, no matter how much DCUM despises spending on jewelry/clothes/push presents.

Ironically, our 5 year anniversary is also coming up soon. Our limit is $100 each year, according to the theme, but I would hardly judge someone who chose to spend more commemorating each year of their marriage.

I have been married over 30 years. We decided in the very early years, when we were saving to buy a house, that we would go out for a nice dinner on our anniversary and not do any gifts. We've done that ever since., even though we now have plenty of money (and 2 houses). It takes a lot of the pressure off.

Sometimes we get ourselves a joint gift, like a weekend trip, or an antique we spotted out together (once a sideboard, once a silver tray). Sometimes we go to dinner. We don't exchange individual gifts, normally.