Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today I learned: one polite email is “begging” and “groveling”

Who do you think is going to be more successful in life: the person who takes what they get and never negotiates or asks for more, or the person who is smart enough to know when putting yourself out there and communicating what you want will pay off?

It is really interesting that parents now see an email asking to raise a grade the same as assertive contract negotiations. This is what’s wrong with this generation. They think they can get what they want by asking, demanding, being polite or assertive, and writing emails and letters. No, what they need to do is the work. Hard work and completion the if the job.

Why don’t you try that. Don’t show up for work but write a polite email asking for your full paycheck without using your sick or vacation time. It’s the same, right?

I’m a high school teacher and I can confirm this. Parents and students push and plead to have grades inflated, or as OP calls it, “grounded up.”

Many parents and students believe that if the student tries his/her best in my AP class, he/she deserves an A. Students and parents often argue that “I worked really hard!” Or “Larlo studied late into the night for your tests.” They truly feel that everybody who works hard deserves the grade they want, and that it is unfair for a student who “tries her very best” to be given a lower grade than the student or parent wants.

Three years ago I had a serious email from a parent asking me to raise her 11th grader’s grade, explaining that her son “needs an A in your class for the colleges he wants.” Her son was a solid B student.

The parents who are not educators just don’t get it. Every kid and every parent thinks that they have some kind of special situation that warrants special consideration. A PP is right that GPA is starting to mean less for admissions. And with a lot of places going test optional that brings us back to… rec letters! Which aren’t going to be very strong if a kid has a reputation for asking for things that they didn’t earn.

Please. Kids are generally smart enough to ask a teacher in a class where they need to improve their grade for a recommendation letter. My daughter choose hard class where she had very solid As - she is exactly what they tell you to do when doing college prep in junior year English class.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today I learned: one polite email is “begging” and “groveling”

Who do you think is going to be more successful in life: the person who takes what they get and never negotiates or asks for more, or the person who is smart enough to know when putting yourself out there and communicating what you want will pay off?

It is really interesting that parents now see an email asking to raise a grade the same as assertive contract negotiations. This is what’s wrong with this generation. They think they can get what they want by asking, demanding, being polite or assertive, and writing emails and letters. No, what they need to do is the work. Hard work and completion the if the job.

Why don’t you try that. Don’t show up for work but write a polite email asking for your full paycheck without using your sick or vacation time. It’s the same, right?

I’m a high school teacher and I can confirm this. Parents and students push and plead to have grades inflated, or as OP calls it, “grounded up.”

Many parents and students believe that if the student tries his/her best in my AP class, he/she deserves an A. Students and parents often argue that “I worked really hard!” Or “Larlo studied late into the night for your tests.” They truly feel that everybody who works hard deserves the grade they want, and that it is unfair for a student who “tries her very best” to be given a lower grade than the student or parent wants.

Three years ago I had a serious email from a parent asking me to raise her 11th grader’s grade, explaining that her son “needs an A in your class for the colleges he wants.” Her son was a solid B student.

The parents who are not educators just don’t get it. Every kid and every parent thinks that they have some kind of special situation that warrants special consideration. A PP is right that GPA is starting to mean less for admissions. And with a lot of places going test optional that brings us back to… rec letters! Which aren’t going to be very strong if a kid has a reputation for asking for things that they didn’t earn.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today I learned: one polite email is “begging” and “groveling”

Who do you think is going to be more successful in life: the person who takes what they get and never negotiates or asks for more, or the person who is smart enough to know when putting yourself out there and communicating what you want will pay off?

It is really interesting that parents now see an email asking to raise a grade the same as assertive contract negotiations. This is what’s wrong with this generation. They think they can get what they want by asking, demanding, being polite or assertive, and writing emails and letters. No, what they need to do is the work. Hard work and completion the if the job.

Why don’t you try that. Don’t show up for work but write a polite email asking for your full paycheck without using your sick or vacation time. It’s the same, right?

I’m a high school teacher and I can confirm this. Parents and students push and plead to have grades inflated, or as OP calls it, “grounded up.”

Many parents and students believe that if the student tries his/her best in my AP class, he/she deserves an A. Students and parents often argue that “I worked really hard!” Or “Larlo studied late into the night for your tests.” They truly feel that everybody who works hard deserves the grade they want, and that it is unfair for a student who “tries her very best” to be given a lower grade than the student or parent wants.

Three years ago I had a serious email from a parent asking me to raise her 11th grader’s grade, explaining that her son “needs an A in your class for the colleges he wants.” Her son was a solid B student.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised DD had 82.28 in Biology, emailed Biology teacher if she can give her B and not B-
teacher responded with
DONE!!!!!!!!
HAVE A GREAT SUMMER


I didn't even say a word to her, but I am proud that she asked. The worse she could've of said was Nope

People, a 82.5 = a B-. The student only asked for a 0.12 increase. I think it was reasonable to ask, and teacher’s discretion to make the change.

Anonymous wrote:1-why do people keep calling it “grounding up? Is that a new term? It’s the it just rounding up?

2-If my kid wanted a recommendation, I would hope they would get a real A and I would recommend they not grade grub with someone they expected to get a recommendation from. But in other cases, I don’t see the harm in asking once, at all. I would never get involved in that situation as a parent, but I see no problem with asking.

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised DD had 82.28 in Biology, emailed Biology teacher if she can give her B and not B-
teacher responded with
DONE!!!!!!!!
HAVE A GREAT SUMMER


I didn't even say a word to her, but I am proud that she asked. The worse she could've of said was Nope

Anonymous wrote:1-why do people keep calling it “grounding up? Is that a new term? It’s the it just rounding up?

2-If my kid wanted a recommendation, I would hope they would get a real A and I would recommend they not grade grub with someone they expected to get a recommendation from. But in other cases, I don’t see the harm in asking once, at all. I would never get involved in that situation as a parent, but I see no problem with asking.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good for her. She’s got to learn to advocate for herself. This is how the world works.

This is why I am proud of her.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today I learned: one polite email is “begging” and “groveling”

Who do you think is going to be more successful in life: the person who takes what they get and never negotiates or asks for more, or the person who is smart enough to know when putting yourself out there and communicating what you want will pay off?

It is really interesting that parents now see an email asking to raise a grade the same as assertive contract negotiations. This is what’s wrong with this generation. They think they can get what they want by asking, demanding, being polite or assertive, and writing emails and letters. No, what they need to do is the work. Hard work and completion the if the job.

Why don’t you try that. Don’t show up for work but write a polite email asking for your full paycheck without using your sick or vacation time. It’s the same, right?

I know you’re not that dumb. No, because that is a silly request, but you know that. The risk of offending, ruining a relationship or your reputation is quite high while the likelihood your request would be granted is next to nothing. It’s a waste. The situation in the OP is the opposite—low risk for a relatively high reward. There’s almost no downsides to asking (unless the professor might write you a recommendation in the future, or you’ll have to take another class with them, but then you might make a different calculation) and the chances of your request being granted aren’t bad. The only risk is that some pearl-clutchers on DCUM will call you a grade grubber. Another important life skill is knowing whose opinions matter and whose are irrelevant.

I’m not that dumb. I’m a high school teacher inundated with emails this week asking. The latest trend, “I don’t believe my current grade is reflective of my ability.” Most believe they should be given an A if they write that. I can show them how they have not earned an A on an assessment all year, despite retakes, and it goes back to “I don’t believe my grade is a reflection of my ability.” Parents go to administration with this same logic. I ignore these emails now because you can’t reason with these people. The families and students definitely get the reputation for being difficult throughout the school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today I learned: one polite email is “begging” and “groveling”

Who do you think is going to be more successful in life: the person who takes what they get and never negotiates or asks for more, or the person who is smart enough to know when putting yourself out there and communicating what you want will pay off?

It is really interesting that parents now see an email asking to raise a grade the same as assertive contract negotiations. This is what’s wrong with this generation. They think they can get what they want by asking, demanding, being polite or assertive, and writing emails and letters. No, what they need to do is the work. Hard work and completion the if the job.

Why don’t you try that. Don’t show up for work but write a polite email asking for your full paycheck without using your sick or vacation time. It’s the same, right?

I know you’re not that dumb. No, because that is a silly request, but you know that. The risk of offending, ruining a relationship or your reputation is quite high while the likelihood your request would be granted is next to nothing. It’s a waste. The situation in the OP is the opposite—low risk for a relatively high reward. There’s almost no downsides to asking (unless the professor might write you a recommendation in the future, or you’ll have to take another class with them, but then you might make a different calculation) and the chances of your request being granted aren’t bad. The only risk is that some pearl-clutchers on DCUM will call you a grade grubber. Another important life skill is knowing whose opinions matter and whose are irrelevant.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today I learned: one polite email is “begging” and “groveling”

Who do you think is going to be more successful in life: the person who takes what they get and never negotiates or asks for more, or the person who is smart enough to know when putting yourself out there and communicating what you want will pay off?

It is really interesting that parents now see an email asking to raise a grade the same as assertive contract negotiations. This is what’s wrong with this generation. They think they can get what they want by asking, demanding, being polite or assertive, and writing emails and letters. No, what they need to do is the work. Hard work and completion the if the job.

Why don’t you try that. Don’t show up for work but write a polite email asking for your full paycheck without using your sick or vacation time. It’s the same, right?

I’m a high school teacher and I can confirm this. Parents and students push and plead to have grades inflated, or as OP calls it, “grounded up.”

Many parents and students believe that if the student tries his/her best in my AP class, he/she deserves an A. Students and parents often argue that “I worked really hard!” Or “Larlo studied late into the night for your tests.” They truly feel that everybody who works hard deserves the grade they want, and that it is unfair for a student who “tries her very best” to be given a lower grade than the student or parent wants.

Three years ago I had a serious email from a parent asking me to raise her 11th grader’s grade, explaining that her son “needs an A in your class for the colleges he wants.” Her son was a solid B student.