Anonymous wrote:Ii could have been your DH many years ago. We had twins, time in NICU, and the blood transfusion. My wife was exhausted and was news doing everything I could to help. She didn't feel like putting out. At this time though, I also needed the intimacy. I wasn't interacting with others enough because it was all babies or work all the time.
My point here is if he told you he needs more intamacy, he needs more intamacy. I accepted some compromises but so did the wife. Honestly, sex somewhat sucked during that time, but the intamacy was important. He shouldn't expect you to bounce back to where you were, but you shouldn't expect him to just happily accept less.
The extreme views in this thread are ridiculous. You both have to compromise.

Anonymous wrote:Ii could have been your DH many years ago. We had twins, time in NICU, and the blood transfusion. My wife was exhausted and was news doing everything I could to help. She didn't feel like putting out. At this time though, I also needed the intimacy. I wasn't interacting with others enough because it was all babies or work all the time.
My point here is if he told you he needs more intamacy, he needs more intamacy. I accepted some compromises but so did the wife. Honestly, sex somewhat sucked during that time, but the intamacy was important. He shouldn't expect you to bounce back to where you were, but you shouldn't expect him to just happily accept less.
The extreme views in this thread are ridiculous. You both have to compromise.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He’s ridiculous. He should be helping you with the twins and helping you get pelvic PT to recover from your birth, not harassing you for sex. Sorry but you’re at the start of a long marathon, and if you don’t get time to relax and rest now you will be extremely depleted by the end of the year. Tell him what you need to feel rested and healed and put yourself first. He’s an idiot if he doesn’t see what you need.

Sex is a part of marriage and this is a terrible opinion. No man is thinking of helping their wives get pelvic PT. Get outta here! Sex can take a few minutes at minimum, it really ain't that hard to do.

Sorry your standards are so low for yourself (or your husband?).

Some of us have great husbands. OP, my husband was extremely hands on with the baby, did night parenting, and didn’t think of pressuring me for anything. We’ve been married for 15 years and going strong in all respects unlike some of the marriages you hear about on here. It’s in large part because he respects me and loves me unconditionally, not just as a convenient hole.

You’ve had a traumatic birth with twins. I hope you give yourself a break and don’t listen to some of the idiots. Truly hope they are trolls.

Anonymous wrote:If you are healed now OP from birthing, I'd put out more to keep your husband happy. I know it's exhausting. Just tell him make it snappy.

Anonymous wrote:If you are healed now OP from birthing, I'd put out more to keep your husband happy. I know it's exhausting. Just tell him make it snappy.

Anonymous wrote:I am team put out. What exactly is wrong with your mouth performing? Your anus? How can you be that tired that you can not spend a couple minutes being intimate with your husband? You are consumed by your children but what about him? Where and when does he get attention and affection from you? If you want, tell him that he needs to be proactive in finding a babysitter once a week so you all can go to a hotel and have sex. Figure it out:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He’s ridiculous. He should be helping you with the twins and helping you get pelvic PT to recover from your birth, not harassing you for sex. Sorry but you’re at the start of a long marathon, and if you don’t get time to relax and rest now you will be extremely depleted by the end of the year. Tell him what you need to feel rested and healed and put yourself first. He’s an idiot if he doesn’t see what you need.

Sex is a part of marriage and this is a terrible opinion. No man is thinking of helping their wives get pelvic PT. Get outta here! Sex can take a few minutes at minimum, it really ain't that hard to do.

Why don’t you go sh*t two watermelons out of your ass for the sake of having a family and then have them attached to you all day for months, eating all the calories you take in? Get back to us about how hard it is or not to take it up the ass as often as demanded after that.

SING IT

Anonymous wrote:I say this with kindness and without judgment: You need to put out before your husband starts looking elsewhere.

Find a babysitter to watch the kids and take an evening for yourselves each week. If you’re still uneasy with your body for whatever reason tell him that. Think of it as a time to perfect your bj skills. Men just operate differently than women it’s normal but you have to compromise. At this point it’s been a year with very little goodies I can understand his frustration.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I say this with kindness and without judgment: You need to put out before your husband starts looking elsewhere.

Find a babysitter to watch the kids and take an evening for yourselves each week. If you’re still uneasy with your body for whatever reason tell him that. Think of it as a time to perfect your bj skills. Men just operate differently than women it’s normal but you have to compromise. At this point it’s been a year with very little goodies I can understand his frustration.

She is THREE MONTHS past having twins and is “putting out” once a week! You’re insane, or a dude who feels like it’s his responsibility to get every other dude laid.

You're living in fantasy land. Soon it'll be but the twins need this... or I'm tired... and before you know it, hubby is looking elsewhere. It's just the way it goes. It's the reality of the thing. It just is. Either she musters up the umph to do it, or she'll be having serious marital issues in the next 3-6 months, I guarantee.

+1 best thing for those kids is a strong marriage

What is it about unwanted sex that leads to a strong marriage?

Your husband won’t leave you for the secretary

If my H left for the secretary or cheated because we were having sex only once a week due to having 3 month old twins, she can have him. Any male who does that is worthless trash and their wife is way better off without them.

These pieces of garbage act like their fidelity is so precious but it’s not. If you can’t keep it in your pants for 6 days, you’re not a man, and you’re not worth having.

But my guess is they’re all selfish guys in sexless marriages who couldn’t get laid if they were paying for it. A secretary? LOL. They aren’t interested, honey.

Anonymous wrote:I say this with kindness and without judgment: You need to put out before your husband starts looking elsewhere.

Find a babysitter to watch the kids and take an evening for yourselves each week. If you’re still uneasy with your body for whatever reason tell him that. Think of it as a time to perfect your bj skills. Men just operate differently than women it’s normal but you have to compromise. At this point it’s been a year with very little goodies I can understand his frustration.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I say this with kindness and without judgment: You need to put out before your husband starts looking elsewhere.

Find a babysitter to watch the kids and take an evening for yourselves each week. If you’re still uneasy with your body for whatever reason tell him that. Think of it as a time to perfect your bj skills. Men just operate differently than women it’s normal but you have to compromise. At this point it’s been a year with very little goodies I can understand his frustration.

She is THREE MONTHS past having twins and is “putting out” once a week! You’re insane, or a dude who feels like it’s his responsibility to get every other dude laid.

You're living in fantasy land. Soon it'll be but the twins need this... or I'm tired... and before you know it, hubby is looking elsewhere. It's just the way it goes. It's the reality of the thing. It just is. Either she musters up the umph to do it, or she'll be having serious marital issues in the next 3-6 months, I guarantee.

+1 best thing for those kids is a strong marriage

What is it about unwanted sex that leads to a strong marriage?

Your husband won’t leave you for the secretary

There are no more secretaries since the 80s. Grandma boomer joined the thread.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I say this with kindness and without judgment: You need to put out before your husband starts looking elsewhere.

Find a babysitter to watch the kids and take an evening for yourselves each week. If you’re still uneasy with your body for whatever reason tell him that. Think of it as a time to perfect your bj skills. Men just operate differently than women it’s normal but you have to compromise. At this point it’s been a year with very little goodies I can understand his frustration.

She is THREE MONTHS past having twins and is “putting out” once a week! You’re insane, or a dude who feels like it’s his responsibility to get every other dude laid.

You're living in fantasy land. Soon it'll be but the twins need this... or I'm tired... and before you know it, hubby is looking elsewhere. It's just the way it goes. It's the reality of the thing. It just is. Either she musters up the umph to do it, or she'll be having serious marital issues in the next 3-6 months, I guarantee.

+1 best thing for those kids is a strong marriage

What is it about unwanted sex that leads to a strong marriage?

Your husband won’t leave you for the secretary