Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get what’s the rush but to each it’s own.

A lot of people have more free time to date in college than they’ll have again for many years.

Exactly. It is arguably better to meet in college, when the available pool of possible mates is much bigger. You share experiences and can meet in casual ways and get to know more about each other. Don’t have kids until your 30s. You’re pretty set then.

Many people marry younger than 30, regardless of social class.

True those are deeper connections but debt, distance, grad school, careers or people’s advice to experience more relationships often rips young couples apart.

I think it depends on many factors. I know a number of couples like us, but of course I know some who married young and divorced. I also know couples who married in their 30s and divorced. Like I said, it depends on a lot of factors.

I meant it these issues stop them from committing and considerate marriage.

I think this trend stems from watching so many 35+women struggle with fertility, healthy children and the energy to be a present parent. I had my kid late many younger women ask me about my experience. I tell the truth and explain that I had a premature baby who spent months in the hospital. I tell them that I have very little energy to chase after a 7 year old, work full time and deal with mid life changes. Plus many of the people who would help raise the kid are old or dead (grandparents, aunts and uncles). Most people over 35 must pay thousands for IVF. Even if insurance covers it, the damage it does to the woman's body and to the baby are just too much to stress about.

The only benefit is that I have more money which ultimately goes to hire more help and take more vacations because I am so tired.


If I knew that my parenting years would have been such a challenge, I would have had kids in my late 20s and early 30s.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
25–27 doesn’t seem early to me. Just about everyone in my grad school circle married before age 30.

I think it’s smart. My generation said wait until 30+ to have kids etc and the majority of us had to do IVF (unless oddly enough Irish? Married at 35 pregnant by honeymoon) in my group ages 34-40. I’ve told my daughters have your kids at 26-30 (first kid). After college but will be younger energetic parents. I had young parents and lost them both. I hope to be around for any future grandkids.

This whole post is very weird. Irish people never have fertility issues?

Anonymous wrote:In my circles, the people most desirable generally married earlier, ie 25-28. Anybody who was still wanting to get married after 35 had some issues.

Let me guess: you think that you are one of those “most desirable people.”

No. Next stupid question.

Anonymous wrote:
25–27 doesn’t seem early to me. Just about everyone in my grad school circle married before age 30.

I think it’s smart. My generation said wait until 30+ to have kids etc and the majority of us had to do IVF (unless oddly enough Irish? Married at 35 pregnant by honeymoon) in my group ages 34-40. I’ve told my daughters have your kids at 26-30 (first kid). After college but will be younger energetic parents. I had young parents and lost them both. I hope to be around for any future grandkids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get what’s the rush but to each it’s own.

A lot of people have more free time to date in college than they’ll have again for many years.

Exactly. It is arguably better to meet in college, when the available pool of possible mates is much bigger. You share experiences and can meet in casual ways and get to know more about each other. Don’t have kids until your 30s. You’re pretty set then.

Many people marry younger than 30, regardless of social class.

True those are deeper connections but debt, distance, grad school, careers or people’s advice to experience more relationships often rips young couples apart.

I think it depends on many factors. I know a number of couples like us, but of course I know some who married young and divorced. I also know couples who married in their 30s and divorced. Like I said, it depends on a lot of factors.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get what’s the rush but to each it’s own.

A lot of people have more free time to date in college than they’ll have again for many years.

Exactly. It is arguably better to meet in college, when the available pool of possible mates is much bigger. You share experiences and can meet in casual ways and get to know more about each other. Don’t have kids until your 30s. You’re pretty set then.

Many people marry younger than 30, regardless of social class.

True those are deeper connections but debt, distance, grad school, careers or people’s advice to experience more relationships often rips young couples apart.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get what’s the rush but to each it’s own.

A lot of people have more free time to date in college than they’ll have again for many years.

Exactly. It is arguably better to meet in college, when the available pool of possible mates is much bigger. You share experiences and can meet in casual ways and get to know more about each other. Don’t have kids until your 30s. You’re pretty set then.

Many people marry younger than 30, regardless of social class.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No because it usually ends in divorce. For the most part people know it's foolish.

No where near a status symbol OP.

Is amicable divorce really that bad? Is it the desirable people who had options that do it? Seems like the no kids amicable divorcees are better than the last to be married. They get stuck and bully their ILs. -still on 1st marriage, but know jerks that blame their looks even though they are better looking than those who marry before them

Incoherent drivel

Marriage age is a verb couple centric factor, some mature early and have compatible partners, financial resources and family support, others have to wait for things to align or they just aren’t ready to commit. To each it’s own. There are pros and cons to both approaches.

That being said, 25 isn’t too early if you both of you have your emotional and financial act together.

Anonymous wrote:Every year you wait to have kids you're shaving off one year at the end of your life you'll get to spend with your children and perhaps grandchildren.

I’ll be sure to call my daughters (“broke” college students) and tell them that!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No because it usually ends in divorce. For the most part people know it's foolish.

No where near a status symbol OP.

All marriages are foolish. Divorce rate is higher for second and third marriages but people take risks to find happiness.

Married people are happier & more successful.

But correlation vs causation…

Anonymous wrote:No because it usually ends in divorce. For the most part people know it's foolish.

No where near a status symbol OP.

All marriages are foolish. Divorce rate is higher for second and third marriages but people take risks to find happiness.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a friend who had a trust fund. I watched with a lot of jealousy how she could afford to have a wedding, buy a house, be a SAHM with 3 kids. These were all things I had to save up lots of money to do.

I got married at 18, my H was in the military, we bought our first house when I was 20, I was a SAHM for ten years, then I went to college and got a degree with no student loans and had a career. I guess most people don't think such a life is possible or desirable. I wouldn't change a thing.

Glad things worked out for you two.

Early Military marriages are common are insurance reasons.

Tricareatops and dependapotamuses are common around military bases

Soldiers go through tough training and then travel and life threatening duties, military psychiatrists like how having a spouse grounds and calms them. They need all the emotional support they can get. It can be a lonely existence.