Anonymous
03/24/2022 09:12
Subject: Re:Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
I feel bad for OP's DC.
I'm in my late 40's now and was so fortunate to have wonderful roommates in college (with whom I am still close). But I had been assigned to roommates who were big partiers, I would have had a really hard time with that. Back in college, I found my classes to be a huge challenge, and so I needed to get decent rest and stay away from partying. I'm not a high-maintenance person at all, but kind of need the basics in a roommate -- a person who is courteous and respectful of my space and time.
Why do these roommates think that they can just impose on OP's DC? The roommates seem rude and entitled.
I'm in my late 40's now and was so fortunate to have wonderful roommates in college (with whom I am still close). But I had been assigned to roommates who were big partiers, I would have had a really hard time with that. Back in college, I found my classes to be a huge challenge, and so I needed to get decent rest and stay away from partying. I'm not a high-maintenance person at all, but kind of need the basics in a roommate -- a person who is courteous and respectful of my space and time.
Why do these roommates think that they can just impose on OP's DC? The roommates seem rude and entitled.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 09:11
Subject: Re:Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Forgot to mention that when DC first met their suitemates, DC said, in retrospect, they strongly implied that the bed DC is now in was vacated because the person who left couldn’t stand living there either.
I was thinking that when you described an open spot mid-semester.
The authorities need to crack down on those selfish, immature kids.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 09:10
Subject: Re:Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:This needs to be up to him. He's not in danger, just inconvenienced. He could take a nap during the day and then stay up later. That may not be his preference, but it's part of group living. And if he really doesn't like it, he can go talk to the RA or housing. Housing may be less resistant if he finds someone willing to switch with him so they don't have to do anything but reassign the room cards.
He could also find a friend who will let him crash on their floor or couch. Truthfully, this is how most college kids would solve it.
OP here—the sleep schedule is an issue too. DC is on a totally different sleep schedule than them; DC gets up and leaves around 7am each day. DC has
overheard the other kids say they’re annoyed by that and the alarm. There days when DC will walk into the room in the middle of the day and the rest of the kids in the suite are sleeping. Messy situation all around. I don’t really consider sharing a room (not just an apartment/suite) with a stranger to be “part of life.” [/quote
My DC is exactly like yours and was able to get a single after COVID came along. We do pay more...but used the refunded dorm fees (from when they came home) to cover part of it. Then my kid won a small additional scholarship. She still hears hall noise, and wears earplugs...but it would be awful if she had multiple loud roommates to contend with. I feel for your child, who sounds mature and independent.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 09:10
Subject: Re:Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:DP. My dd (a couple years back) went to the RA after confronting her roommate over incense use. The RA, in her great wisdom, told DD’s roommate how she found out about the incense use (from dd) and told the girl to stop using it. The roommate threatened DD to never tell the RA anything again.
No one likes a rat. By college, kids need to learn how to solve their issues without resorting to tattling.
Then there shouldn’t be RAs getting free housing.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 09:09
Subject: Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
Anonymous wrote:For parents with younger kids:this is why they should choose a roommate based upon the survey that Res Life makes available (at least that is what they did in my kid's SLAC). They will be more compatible for LIVING TOGETHER.
Choosing by who looks cool on Facebook or likes the same music is a mistake.
OP’s kid was placed with these people, probably haphazardly. On second roommate situations, any compatibility matching goes out the window and it’s about going wherever there’s space.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 09:09
Subject: Re:Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
Anonymous wrote:DP. My dd (a couple years back) went to the RA after confronting her roommate over incense use. The RA, in her great wisdom, told DD’s roommate how she found out about the incense use (from dd) and told the girl to stop using it. The roommate threatened DD to never tell the RA anything again.
No one likes a rat. By college, kids need to learn how to solve their issues without resorting to tattling.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 09:09
Subject: Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
My son had the same problem freshman year. He does not drink or do drugs. He had some roommates who wanted to party 24-7.
I told him to tell his roommates he needed his sleep. They compromised with only having parties Thursday-Saturday.
I told him to tell his roommates he needed his sleep. They compromised with only having parties Thursday-Saturday.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 09:07
Subject: Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
For parents with younger kids:this is why they should choose a roommate based upon the survey that Res Life makes available (at least that is what they did in my kid's SLAC). They will be more compatible for LIVING TOGETHER.
Choosing by who looks cool on Facebook or likes the same music is a mistake.
Choosing by who looks cool on Facebook or likes the same music is a mistake.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 09:05
Subject: Re:Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
DP. My dd (a couple years back) went to the RA after confronting her roommate over incense use. The RA, in her great wisdom, told DD’s roommate how she found out about the incense use (from dd) and told the girl to stop using it. The roommate threatened DD to never tell the RA anything again.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 09:02
Subject: Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
This gets me angry since both drinking and pot use are probably illegal kids that age.
For every bro who says everyone is doing it, some of us have kids who are quiet, serious students. That is what mine is like also OP.
The school should enforce rules. They cost a lot. It is infuriating that kids who are there to study, and try to stay healthy by getting adequate sleep are left to their own devices.
For every bro who says everyone is doing it, some of us have kids who are quiet, serious students. That is what mine is like also OP.
The school should enforce rules. They cost a lot. It is infuriating that kids who are there to study, and try to stay healthy by getting adequate sleep are left to their own devices.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 09:00
Subject: Re:Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
Anonymous wrote:Kids that age should be getting 8-9 hours of sleep a night.
Yes, OP's kid should go to the roommates armed with this information. I'm sure it will work!
Anonymous
03/24/2022 08:58
Subject: Re:Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
Kids that age should be getting 8-9 hours of sleep a night.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 08:57
Subject: Re:Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:There are deals that could be struck. For instance, keep your party out of my room after 10 PM. I'll be sure to turn off my alarm after the first beep.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:There are two months left in the year.
Your child should be speaking up TO THEIR ROOMMATES, not to the college. My goodness, the snowflakes. This is interpersonal relationship and accountability 101, folks.
What’s that going to do besides cause awkwardness? It sounds like OP’s kid is outnumbered. They aren’t going to change their shitty lifestyles.
OP here. I haven’t been posting. This is a good, specific suggestion.
What school is this? State or private? Want to know if privates handle such situations better than state schools. Thanks
OP here. Big state school.
From my interactions with relatives who have older kids, it appears privates handle these situations way better. But a lot of them do not allow you to move off-campus at all.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 08:57
Subject: Re:Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:There are two months left in the year.
Your child should be speaking up TO THEIR ROOMMATES, not to the college. My goodness, the snowflakes. This is interpersonal relationship and accountability 101, folks.
What’s that going to do besides cause awkwardness? It sounds like OP’s kid is outnumbered. They aren’t going to change their shitty lifestyles.
How many college students do you know who got up everyday (even the weekends) with a 7a alarm? Maybe OP's kid is not the norm. I would not expect housing to fix this kind of problem. Kid is just going to have to suck it up until the end of year. If kid was resourceful they'd already be sleeping somewhere else most nights.
NP. I know this may come as a shock to you, but some kids are shy and seriously struggle socially in college. Some kids don’t have any real friends. But glad to know you had an entire network of friends as a freshman to crash with!
Gee, with a mom like this who would have ever forseen this child struggling socially? I'm sure mom rushing in to villainize the peers will help the child, socially.
Anonymous
03/24/2022 08:56
Subject: Re:Options to get freshman dc out of a really bad roommate situation? Airbnb?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:There are deals that could be struck. For instance, keep your party out of my room after 10 PM. I'll be sure to turn off my alarm after the first beep.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:There are two months left in the year.
Your child should be speaking up TO THEIR ROOMMATES, not to the college. My goodness, the snowflakes. This is interpersonal relationship and accountability 101, folks.
What’s that going to do besides cause awkwardness? It sounds like OP’s kid is outnumbered. They aren’t going to change their shitty lifestyles.
OP here. I haven’t been posting. This is a good, specific suggestion.
What school is this? State or private? Want to know if privates handle such situations better than state schools. Thanks