Anonymous wrote:OP, ignore the mean girls. My mother died painlessly of a UTI that turned septic. Was not a bad way to go, however, she was not demented. Her body was worn out with obesity and diabetes. Anyway, we are unwilling to talk about death in this country due to religious nut jobs and cultural taboos. I hope things will be better when I’m old and sick. Hang in there. Care for yourself. Pay people to help. Sending hugs.

+ me that is how I know not to give antibiotics. Dad had lewy body and was a complete mess. Honestly it was let him go of the uti or face jail. The nursing home couldn’t deal with him as he was aggressive. Theywould call the police who couldn’t deal and the emts gave him so many meds he got dehydrated and boom uti.

People who have never gone through it have no idea.

This is a long shot, but…Switzerland allows aid in dying for non terminally ill patients. NYT just did a story on a woman, Amy Bloom, who took her husband to Switzerland for this purpose m. Someone linked to it upthread. Took $10,000 and a lot of legwork and I’m guessing your parent might be too ill for such a trip, but I thought I’d mention it, just in case.

I’m sure you’re also aware there are right to die laws in some states here, once you’re expected to die in 6 months; could be helpful at some point.

I’m so sorry you and your mom are going through this.