#1 - DH didn't want to talk about baby names for months and at like 6 months pregnant, I told him what I called the baby in my head and he liked it so we named the baby that name. We had some backups just in case but didn't really need them.

#2- DH wanted more input this time so he suggested some terrible names that I vetoed. I suggested some better names that he vetoed. Ultimately, I found one very random name while down a baby name rabbit hole in a boring all day meeting and we both agreed on it. There were no backups. It was the only choice we agreed on.

#3 - We each had a list of names and ended up with 4 that we both liked. I liked 2 more than the other 2 and vice versa but we would both be happy with any of the names. We had pretty much settled on one of the names and were actively using that name when referring to the baby. A week before the baby was born, my DH tells me that he actually thinks the baby's name is a different one on the list (my favorite name) and say that's great. And pray the baby comes before he changed his mind (he didn't).

I won. My DH wanted Michael, but we have a very common Irish last name. I wanted Casey, which goes perfectly with our last name but is just a more romantic, charming name

Anonymous wrote:DH and I agreed on the names of all three of our kids. We never entertained the idea of picking a name the other one disliked.

We didn't know the sex of our first two; thankfully, the oldest was a girl and we'd had a girls name picked out for years. For the second, a boy, we had a short list of names and independently liked the same one after he was born. And for the third, also a boy, we used one of the names on that shortlist for our second, because we still liked it. Easy.

Yeah, if someone really didn't like the name, it was off the list (which eliminated a couple of names I really liked). In our case, he suggested zero names, other than asking that, if it were a boy, the middle name be a certain family name. I came up with a list of names, he vetoed the ones he didn't like, and I chose the one I liked best. I guess I "won," but it wasn't really an adversarial process.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How would you know the mom won, vs. the dad? (Not including Juniors and III etc.) Does Mom = weird name? That seems unnecessarily sexist.

OP here. I know it's unnecessarily sexist, but I can't help myself. It just pops into my head whenever someone introduces kids. For example:
Annabel (mom)
Jordan the girl (dad)
Gerald (the in-laws)
Moana (3-year old Annabel).

I have synesthesia for the origins of names. Does anybody else?

And yet my DH is the one who wanted Annabelle, Isabelle, Liliana, all the frilly names. I wanted Ruth, Helen, or Eileen. We ended up with a compromise at Eliza.

DH and I decided together for both of our kids. We both had our own list, but came to a consensus on what would work for us. When MIL asked that we not name one of our kids after her father we both agreed. Neither felt like one person won over the other. DS2's name is the result of using both of our first names in a random name generator to find something unique that worked for us.

Anonymous wrote:I would never use a name my spouse hated, no matter how much I liked it. Hence why my daughter is not named Margaret.

Oh man, I wanted a Margaret, nn Daisy! Or Marjorie. Or Jane. Probably would’ve gone with Jane. Only have one child, boy, so the world will never know.

Fifty-plus years ago my parents alternated choices for their four girls. My mother still complains about his choices.

For my daughter, I knew what I wanted, but continued the name discussion. The baby was an emergency C-section, three months early, and as I took signed consent for the surgery, I took off the oxygen mask long enough to say the name I wanted, and my partner instantly agreed. I could have said Esmerelda Buckethead and she would have said okay!

Baby and I are fine. Long time ago, but still makes me laugh.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I won on the first two girls. He won on the third and that's why you have a fourth Isabella in your child's class. I basically hate her name.

WTH? Isabella isn't actually that common, PP. You need to chill out.

This. And I love the name Isabella.

Anonymous wrote:Our kids' first names are ones we both agreed on. Neither of us got our first choices, but neither of us hated them, either. DH chose the middle name for DC#1 and I chose for DC #2. Guess at this point you could say I "won", because #1 legally dropped the middle name last year.

The bold indicates a whole other set of questions, like, did you DC#1 change the name because of disliking it? And did it upset DH? Guess that depends on how invested DH was in the fact the name was his choice--?

Surprised to see so many posts here proclaiming "wins." Not my personal way to think of any decision in a marriage, especially something as important as a child's name. We came up with DD's name together.

DD got my grandmother's first name, the first name of an author who is important to me, and her aunt's name (DH's sister's first name which also happens to be DH's mother's middle name so we chose it to rep both of them).

Yes, three names in front of the surname, which is DH's surname. I also have three names plus surname, due to being named for two people then given a third name to be "all my own" as my mom used to say. I love my names. Before folks jump in to say it's a hassle to have four names total instead of first/middle/last--it's never been an issue for me so I was willing to do that to my DD. DD is a young adult now and says it's not an issue for her either. The occasional form doesn't have enough room, but that's all.

If we'd had a son, we likely would have gone with a male name from DH's family, but absolutely not DH's own name--he was clear about not wanting any "junior." Male names in my family are so weird the men went by nicknames for life. Not a lot of current names thrill us. The male names we would have used are very traditional names and not fashionably traditional like some that have made comebacks. But we'd have used and loved them.

My niece and nephew have the most pretentious names ever. I can definitely see their father won for both of those!

Our kids' first names are ones we both agreed on. Neither of us got our first choices, but neither of us hated them, either. DH chose the middle name for DC#1 and I chose for DC #2. Guess at this point you could say I "won", because #1 legally dropped the middle name last year.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never use a name my spouse hated, no matter how much I liked it. Hence why my daughter is not named Margaret.

Same, and why my kid is not named Beatrice. Though recently not-Beatrice asked me if, when she is grown up and has a baby, I would name her. I still have chance for a baby Beatrice!

(I'm kidding! Mostly!)

That’s right! Play the long game.

Anonymous wrote:I would never use a name my spouse hated, no matter how much I liked it. Hence why my daughter is not named Margaret.

Same, and why my kid is not named Beatrice. Though recently not-Beatrice asked me if, when she is grown up and has a baby, I would name her. I still have chance for a baby Beatrice!

(I'm kidding! Mostly!)

DS: we both picked it and liked it. We wrote out a list and out of the list there were two names we both really liked. After a few days of not talking about, we sat down for dinner and both of us said the name.

DD: it was my husband. He said if he ever had a daughter he wanted to name her “sally Marie smith”.

If we have an other, I’m going to pick it out. I have always wanted to name one of my kids after my great grandmother, I was pretty close with her. And I already have a name picked if it’s a boy or girl.