Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t quit your job. Your savings are too low to be comfortable. When you have several houses with your husband for $10mm or so then you can “retire”. I recently divorced in a similar situation. Was SAHM for 10 years, and went to $65k/year job. My exH quit his job just before divorce in order not to pay child support and alimony. Thankfully we had assets and I got 2 rental properties $4mm worth that help a lot.
Your lost future earning capacity, retirement savings, loss of social circle would never be restored if you quit. Just find something less demanding and never rely on other people. Husbands come and leave all the time, particularly those who travel often….

Lucky my husband doesn’t travel I guess lol

Smh...you sound like you've got the street sense of a 10 year old. Good luck.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t quit your job. Your savings are too low to be comfortable. When you have several houses with your husband for $10mm or so then you can “retire”. I recently divorced in a similar situation. Was SAHM for 10 years, and went to $65k/year job. My exH quit his job just before divorce in order not to pay child support and alimony. Thankfully we had assets and I got 2 rental properties $4mm worth that help a lot.
Your lost future earning capacity, retirement savings, loss of social circle would never be restored if you quit. Just find something less demanding and never rely on other people. Husbands come and leave all the time, particularly those who travel often….

Lucky my husband doesn’t travel I guess lol

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t quit your job. Your savings are too low to be comfortable. When you have several houses with your husband for $10mm or so then you can “retire”. I recently divorced in a similar situation. Was SAHM for 10 years, and went to $65k/year job. My exH quit his job just before divorce in order not to pay child support and alimony. Thankfully we had assets and I got 2 rental properties $4mm worth that help a lot.
Your lost future earning capacity, retirement savings, loss of social circle would never be restored if you quit. Just find something less demanding and never rely on other people. Husbands come and leave all the time, particularly those who travel often….

Lucky my husband doesn’t travel I guess lol

Anonymous wrote:Don’t quit your job. Your savings are too low to be comfortable. When you have several houses with your husband for $10mm or so then you can “retire”. I recently divorced in a similar situation. Was SAHM for 10 years, and went to $65k/year job. My exH quit his job just before divorce in order not to pay child support and alimony. Thankfully we had assets and I got 2 rental properties $4mm worth that help a lot.
Your lost future earning capacity, retirement savings, loss of social circle would never be restored if you quit. Just find something less demanding and never rely on other people. Husbands come and leave all the time, particularly those who travel often….

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think I would quit completely, as others have said, find another job instead. I’m in finance and quit for a year, and it was extremely hard to find work with a gap in my resume. once the kids are older and in school you may regret not working. I assume you also spent a lot of time and money on your career, so I’d try to at least work part time or find a lower paying job while your kids are small.

With Covid, I’ve found that everything is changing. I work in finance too and we just hired two people over the last year with much more significant gaps in their resumes. Things are more fluid now, and, especially given the great resignation talks, hiring managers are much more open to non traditional backgrounds and gaps on resumes. It’s all in how you frame it, but OP shouldn’t be worried about navigating out and then back in if she decides SAH isn’t for her longer-term.

FWIW, we are in an unusual time. I think once people start running out of money they will be going back, and job hiring will be competitive again.

Yeah, I wouldn't quit my job thinking I could get another easily a year or two from now. It's too volatile. ANd her background is in law which has a surplus of people even these days.

I am hearing billable hours are way down for certain areas (way up in real estate), so I would think in house would get more rather than less competitive.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think I would quit completely, as others have said, find another job instead. I’m in finance and quit for a year, and it was extremely hard to find work with a gap in my resume. once the kids are older and in school you may regret not working. I assume you also spent a lot of time and money on your career, so I’d try to at least work part time or find a lower paying job while your kids are small.

With Covid, I’ve found that everything is changing. I work in finance too and we just hired two people over the last year with much more significant gaps in their resumes. Things are more fluid now, and, especially given the great resignation talks, hiring managers are much more open to non traditional backgrounds and gaps on resumes. It’s all in how you frame it, but OP shouldn’t be worried about navigating out and then back in if she decides SAH isn’t for her longer-term.

FWIW, we are in an unusual time. I think once people start running out of money they will be going back, and job hiring will be competitive again.

Yeah, I wouldn't quit my job thinking I could get another easily a year or two from now. It's too volatile. ANd her background is in law which has a surplus of people even these days.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think I would quit completely, as others have said, find another job instead. I’m in finance and quit for a year, and it was extremely hard to find work with a gap in my resume. once the kids are older and in school you may regret not working. I assume you also spent a lot of time and money on your career, so I’d try to at least work part time or find a lower paying job while your kids are small.

With Covid, I’ve found that everything is changing. I work in finance too and we just hired two people over the last year with much more significant gaps in their resumes. Things are more fluid now, and, especially given the great resignation talks, hiring managers are much more open to non traditional backgrounds and gaps on resumes. It’s all in how you frame it, but OP shouldn’t be worried about navigating out and then back in if she decides SAH isn’t for her longer-term.

FWIW, we are in an unusual time. I think once people start running out of money they will be going back, and job hiring will be competitive again.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think I would quit completely, as others have said, find another job instead. I’m in finance and quit for a year, and it was extremely hard to find work with a gap in my resume. once the kids are older and in school you may regret not working. I assume you also spent a lot of time and money on your career, so I’d try to at least work part time or find a lower paying job while your kids are small.

With Covid, I’ve found that everything is changing. I work in finance too and we just hired two people over the last year with much more significant gaps in their resumes. Things are more fluid now, and, especially given the great resignation talks, hiring managers are much more open to non traditional backgrounds and gaps on resumes. It’s all in how you frame it, but OP shouldn’t be worried about navigating out and then back in if she decides SAH isn’t for her longer-term.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would definitely go with a full time nanny / housekeeper first. See how you feel after 6 months of that.

For some reason hiring and managing help seems like just more work. I know that if everything works perfectly it will be helpful but the time and energy I’ll need to put in on the front end to do this (and then hoping everything works well after hiring or I’d have to do it all over again) seems overwhelming. Is there some trick I’m missing? I’d honestly rather do all this stuff myself - I like to cook and clean and watch my kid (not everyday, she’d stay in childcare part time even if I resigned) but I’d rather do household chores and errands than my job.

It's not that hard. If you are overwhelmed use an agency like White House Nannies to find a housekeeper and/or nanny. I promise after a couple of years being a stay at home parent is not glamorous and it will not be easy to go back to a $250k in house job. It also changes your relationship with your spouse in a lot of ways that aren't good and can lead to a lot of resentment. There's a lot of talk about you and your feelings. Have you thought about him and the pressure it puts on him to be a sole provider for potentially the next 20 years particularly in a volitile industry? What happens if he loses his job, you are pregnant and now have no health insurance? In addition to likely quadrupling your healthcare costs by going on the exchange for a crappy plan, you have no income coming in so start going into savings. What if he gets cancer and can't work or needs to take time off? All of the burden for income, benefits and retirement shifts to him. It's a lot of pressure to put on him. I would strongly encourage you to try some of the things that have been suggested before quiting alltogther.

OP, I think a lot of these responses are driven by anxious gen X’ers. The workforce is changing; you can go back and earn even more than $250k if you really want to…I know a few friends and acquaintances who have made similar comp jumps recently after taking a few years off. You only have one life to live, as others have said. And while cliche, your health (emotional and physical) and your family is more important than adding a bit more $$ to your retirement accounts to tap at the end of your life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would definitely go with a full time nanny / housekeeper first. See how you feel after 6 months of that.

For some reason hiring and managing help seems like just more work. I know that if everything works perfectly it will be helpful but the time and energy I’ll need to put in on the front end to do this (and then hoping everything works well after hiring or I’d have to do it all over again) seems overwhelming. Is there some trick I’m missing? I’d honestly rather do all this stuff myself - I like to cook and clean and watch my kid (not everyday, she’d stay in childcare part time even if I resigned) but I’d rather do household chores and errands than my job.

It's not that hard. If you are overwhelmed use an agency like White House Nannies to find a housekeeper and/or nanny. I promise after a couple of years being a stay at home parent is not glamorous and it will not be easy to go back to a $250k in house job. It also changes your relationship with your spouse in a lot of ways that aren't good and can lead to a lot of resentment. There's a lot of talk about you and your feelings. Have you thought about him and the pressure it puts on him to be a sole provider for potentially the next 20 years particularly in a volitile industry? What happens if he loses his job, you are pregnant and now have no health insurance? In addition to likely quadrupling your healthcare costs by going on the exchange for a crappy plan, you have no income coming in so start going into savings. What if he gets cancer and can't work or needs to take time off? All of the burden for income, benefits and retirement shifts to him. It's a lot of pressure to put on him. I would strongly encourage you to try some of the things that have been suggested before quiting alltogther.

OP, I think a lot of these responses are driven by anxious gen X’ers. The workforce is changing; you can go back and earn even more than $250k if you really want to…I know a few friends and acquaintances who have made similar comp jumps recently after taking a few years off. You only have one life to live, as others have said. And while cliche, your health (emotional and physical) and your family is more important than adding a bit more $$ to your retirement accounts to tap at the end of your life.