Anonymous wrote: By comparison I paid my own college in 1980-1981 as a freshman with zero savings and zero loans.

I went to a SUNY school in NY and tuition was $900
A year.

I worked at Barclays Bank part time in school year and full time in sumner. Can you imagine today’.

I am attending a top 50 school in Europe. Tuition for one year is less than a thousand euros.

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Anonymous wrote:We told our kids very early on that it was a public instate college or they paid the difference. Even if I could afford $80,000a year, I wouldn’t pay that for an undergrad degree.

Why did you have kids if you're not prepared to pay for college? We saved the money and paid every cent (full pay) for the costs and all expenses at top 10 schools for each of our kids.

You can be prepared to pay for college but not prepared to pay $80k per year for college. Just like I'm prepared to buy a car but not a top of the line luxury car. Paying for your kid to go to an $80k college is purely a luxury. They can get a good education and solid start in life for half that price. Fine to pay more if you want to and can afford it but it's hardly a parental failing to not to do that.

You’re going to tell you child they can’t go to MIT, Stanford or an Ivy League college because it’s too expensive? I’d mortgage my teeth and take out loans for my kid if I haven’t saved enough.

And sometimes an expensive but less competitive LAC can turn a mediocre student’s life around. Happened to my little brother. He’s forever grateful our parents really sacrificed to pay for his private college.

That is exactly what we told our high-performing kid. He had/has the stats and the profile, but did not apply because we can't pay for it.

I would not mortgage my teeth or take out loans, unless the loans were very modest (they would not have been).

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Anonymous wrote:Planning is key if you are UMC. You may not be able to afford McLean or Bethesda and an expensive school. So many people stretch for expensive school areas and then complain cause they can’t afford private colleges.

Meh. There are worse "habits" than buying a not-so-expensive house in one of those areas - and attending PUBLIC schools; and worse "problems" then your kid getting into (only) private colleges. Some people don't have family to help out, so no matter how much they save, or how much they plan, it is not enough due to the quickly rising college prices, and the lack of financial aid that goes to middle class donut hole families.

Don't pretend to know other people's situations, and maybe be glad if you don't experience that issue.

If you bought in an expensive school area, don’t complain that you can’t afford college.

Me: We saved $280,000 in the 529 in 14 years!
William and Mary: That'll be $340,000 for two undergrad business degrees.

Me: This duplex has rats.
Yale: You own a million-dollar home and your EFC is $106,000/year.

14 years? So what...you're sitting on $600,000 or so in equity? Better pony up. You don't need that school district anymore.

We have a 900 square foot house. How do we downsize? It’s already the size of some peoples sheds.

You can downgrade to a less expensive neighborhood or city/county. If you only have 900 sqft and its a $1 million house - you live in an extremely desirable area, most likely downtown.

You could get a house for $300,000 in a county 2 hours drive away and probably 3,000 sqft.

Downgrading community amenities and location, allows you to tap that equity.

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Anonymous wrote:For those reading this and freaking out, use the college Net Price Calculators for an estimate of need-based aid. If that's not going to cut it for your family, the earlier you understand that, the better you can begin to look for lower priced options and places that offer merit scholarships. Realistic expectations.

What if those colleges are not a good fit for your kid?

None of them (there are hundreds)? Only the expensive brand names are a good fit,

People are starting to realize the emperor has no clothes. College costs are exceeding it’s benefit.

If you run the numbers and just invest the money that a college degree would cost, and gift that to your kids in lieu of tuition, they may end up better off in the long run.

Also, there’s no shame in starting out with community college.

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Anonymous wrote:I’m not the least bit surprised after paying for private school. My nephew’s preschool (4 hours) is $24,000 an academic year. My DD’s high school is $42,600. My alma mater is now $58,195 and DH’s is $72,200.

Private schools are extremely expensive.

+1. After 12 plus years of “free” education in public school, lots of public school parents are shocked.

+2. This is so true. Plus OP and others are determining worth of a college based on future earning potential. There is so much more involved than how much your kid will earn after graduation.

My spouse went to a no name college and earns 4-6 times more than me because of the professions we choose.

Me too. And he went to that no name college because it gave him a full ride, when he also got into Duke and Penn and those schools didn’t offer him anything.

You can’t prove a negative. Do you ever wonder how much better he could have done if he went to Penn or Duke? Who he could have met there? What ideas could have been born in those environments that would have made him happier today?

You can’t make decisions for your child based on your husband’s experience.

Good lord, is everyone on this board a starf*cker?

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Anonymous wrote:Planning is key if you are UMC. You may not be able to afford McLean or Bethesda and an expensive school. So many people stretch for expensive school areas and then complain cause they can’t afford private colleges.

Meh. There are worse "habits" than buying a not-so-expensive house in one of those areas - and attending PUBLIC schools; and worse "problems" then your kid getting into (only) private colleges. Some people don't have family to help out, so no matter how much they save, or how much they plan, it is not enough due to the quickly rising college prices, and the lack of financial aid that goes to middle class donut hole families.

Don't pretend to know other people's situations, and maybe be glad if you don't experience that issue.

If you bought in an expensive school area, don’t complain that you can’t afford college.

Me: We saved $280,000 in the 529 in 14 years!
William and Mary: That'll be $340,000 for two undergrad business degrees.

Me: This duplex has rats.
Yale: You own a million-dollar home and your EFC is $106,000/year.

14 years? So what...you're sitting on $600,000 or so in equity? Better pony up. You don't need that school district anymore.

Me: finally got a big salary bump, 200k a year HHI sure is great.
College: Should have been saving based based on that 200k a year HHI when you had a 140k a year HHI.

Me: kids are finally old enough to go back to work
College: why weren't you saving based on that number for the past 18 years

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Planning is key if you are UMC. You may not be able to afford McLean or Bethesda and an expensive school. So many people stretch for expensive school areas and then complain cause they can’t afford private colleges.

Meh. There are worse "habits" than buying a not-so-expensive house in one of those areas - and attending PUBLIC schools; and worse "problems" then your kid getting into (only) private colleges. Some people don't have family to help out, so no matter how much they save, or how much they plan, it is not enough due to the quickly rising college prices, and the lack of financial aid that goes to middle class donut hole families.

Don't pretend to know other people's situations, and maybe be glad if you don't experience that issue.

If you bought in an expensive school area, don’t complain that you can’t afford college.

Me: We saved $280,000 in the 529 in 14 years!
William and Mary: That'll be $340,000 for two undergrad business degrees.

Me: This duplex has rats.
Yale: You own a million-dollar home and your EFC is $106,000/year.

14 years? So what...you're sitting on $600,000 or so in equity? Better pony up. You don't need that school district anymore.

We have a 900 square foot house. How do we downsize? It’s already the size of some peoples sheds.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:We told our kids very early on that it was a public instate college or they paid the difference. Even if I could afford $80,000a year, I wouldn’t pay that for an undergrad degree.

Why did you have kids if you're not prepared to pay for college? We saved the money and paid every cent (full pay) for the costs and all expenses at top 10 schools for each of our kids.

You can be prepared to pay for college but not prepared to pay $80k per year for college. Just like I'm prepared to buy a car but not a top of the line luxury car. Paying for your kid to go to an $80k college is purely a luxury. They can get a good education and solid start in life for half that price. Fine to pay more if you want to and can afford it but it's hardly a parental failing to not to do that.

You’re going to tell you child they can’t go to MIT, Stanford or an Ivy League college because it’s too expensive? I’d mortgage my teeth and take out loans for my kid if I haven’t saved enough.

And sometimes an expensive but less competitive LAC can turn a mediocre student’s life around. Happened to my little brother. He’s forever grateful our parents really sacrificed to pay for his private college.

Yes, I would. Mine know now we did the state prepaid and have enough for room and board and some for graduate school and we will find the money for the rest of graduate school. They are appreciative for that. We have saved since birth, tiny crappy house and do the best we can to save. No loans.

It's kinda ridiculous that we all have to scrimp and save and live in crappy houses to pay for college -- and then for our kids to do it all over again with their own kids. Scrimp and save and live in crappy houses (even with their great jobs from private educations) because costs are so high. It's just a cycle and it seems to be getting worse that we sacrifice so much to save for college since they are born. I'm not saying don't save and to spend recklessly, but that college savings in particular should take so much out of us is ridiculous. (and I'm saying this as someone who scrimped and saved and lives in a crappy house and drives a crappy car). Something is wrong here.

Agree but what is the other option? My grandparents helped my parents. Both sets. One grandma was broke and now dead and my parents are both very comfortable and stingy. Not so much as a birthday gift let alone college. I don’t want mine starting out life in debt. So, we live in a crappy house and save.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Planning is key if you are UMC. You may not be able to afford McLean or Bethesda and an expensive school. So many people stretch for expensive school areas and then complain cause they can’t afford private colleges.

Meh. There are worse "habits" than buying a not-so-expensive house in one of those areas - and attending PUBLIC schools; and worse "problems" then your kid getting into (only) private colleges. Some people don't have family to help out, so no matter how much they save, or how much they plan, it is not enough due to the quickly rising college prices, and the lack of financial aid that goes to middle class donut hole families.

Don't pretend to know other people's situations, and maybe be glad if you don't experience that issue.

If you bought in an expensive school area, don’t complain that you can’t afford college.

Me: We saved $280,000 in the 529 in 14 years!
William and Mary: That'll be $340,000 for two undergrad business degrees.

Me: This duplex has rats.
Yale: You own a million-dollar home and your EFC is $106,000/year.

14 years? So what...you're sitting on $600,000 or so in equity? Better pony up. You don't need that school district anymore.

If the colleges saw our house they’d feel sorry for us. I have no issue appealing our property taxes. Years ago I did it in person and the woman was horrified by the pictures it was so bad.

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Anonymous wrote:This is why there are constant articles and discussion about college costs. Most UMC folks are usually well aware of this.

OP here-- yes, as previously stated, we know college is expensive and will have enough for most (not all) schools if DS does his part to make good grades and be responsible. I was just surprised that there were so many expensive colleges and even the well regarded public schools are a lot (I think UMich was something like 69K per year once you factor living expenses). I don't know how people who aren't rich and don't qualify for financial aid afford anything except in-state-- even then, the cost has gone up a lot.

There is an expectation families save. I don't get those families living in expensive housing and comfortable lives complaining about college costs. We aren't high income and we managed to save. We live in a house most people here would not, very small and needs lots of work. It was the cheapest house we could find at the time. We drive our vehicles till they die and only take a vacation every few years at best. True middle class will qualify for financial aid. If you don't qualify, then except for some exceptions like health issues, special needs, having to care for family, etc. then you need to make an effort to save.

300k for undergrad is an insane expectation

I agree with both of you

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We told our kids very early on that it was a public instate college or they paid the difference. Even if I could afford $80,000a year, I wouldn’t pay that for an undergrad degree.

Why did you have kids if you're not prepared to pay for college? We saved the money and paid every cent (full pay) for the costs and all expenses at top 10 schools for each of our kids.

You can be prepared to pay for college but not prepared to pay $80k per year for college. Just like I'm prepared to buy a car but not a top of the line luxury car. Paying for your kid to go to an $80k college is purely a luxury. They can get a good education and solid start in life for half that price. Fine to pay more if you want to and can afford it but it's hardly a parental failing to not to do that.

You’re going to tell you child they can’t go to MIT, Stanford or an Ivy League college because it’s too expensive? I’d mortgage my teeth and take out loans for my kid if I haven’t saved enough.

And sometimes an expensive but less competitive LAC can turn a mediocre student’s life around. Happened to my little brother. He’s forever grateful our parents really sacrificed to pay for his private college.

Yes, I would. Mine know now we did the state prepaid and have enough for room and board and some for graduate school and we will find the money for the rest of graduate school. They are appreciative for that. We have saved since birth, tiny crappy house and do the best we can to save. No loans.

It's kinda ridiculous that we all have to scrimp and save and live in crappy houses to pay for college -- and then for our kids to do it all over again with their own kids. Scrimp and save and live in crappy houses (even with their great jobs from private educations) because costs are so high. It's just a cycle and it seems to be getting worse that we sacrifice so much to save for college since they are born. I'm not saying don't save and to spend recklessly, but that college savings in particular should take so much out of us is ridiculous. (and I'm saying this as someone who scrimped and saved and lives in a crappy house and drives a crappy car). Something is wrong here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Planning is key if you are UMC. You may not be able to afford McLean or Bethesda and an expensive school. So many people stretch for expensive school areas and then complain cause they can’t afford private colleges.

Meh. There are worse "habits" than buying a not-so-expensive house in one of those areas - and attending PUBLIC schools; and worse "problems" then your kid getting into (only) private colleges. Some people don't have family to help out, so no matter how much they save, or how much they plan, it is not enough due to the quickly rising college prices, and the lack of financial aid that goes to middle class donut hole families.

Don't pretend to know other people's situations, and maybe be glad if you don't experience that issue.

If you bought in an expensive school area, don’t complain that you can’t afford college.

Me: We saved $280,000 in the 529 in 14 years!
William and Mary: That'll be $340,000 for two undergrad business degrees.

Me: This duplex has rats.
Yale: You own a million-dollar home and your EFC is $106,000/year.

14 years? So what...you're sitting on $600,000 or so in equity? Better pony up. You don't need that school district anymore.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Planning is key if you are UMC. You may not be able to afford McLean or Bethesda and an expensive school. So many people stretch for expensive school areas and then complain cause they can’t afford private colleges.

Meh. There are worse "habits" than buying a not-so-expensive house in one of those areas - and attending PUBLIC schools; and worse "problems" then your kid getting into (only) private colleges. Some people don't have family to help out, so no matter how much they save, or how much they plan, it is not enough due to the quickly rising college prices, and the lack of financial aid that goes to middle class donut hole families.

Don't pretend to know other people's situations, and maybe be glad if you don't experience that issue.

If you bought in an expensive school area, don’t complain that you can’t afford college.

Me: We saved $280,000 in the 529 in 14 years!
William and Mary: That'll be $340,000 for two undergrad business degrees.

Me: This duplex has rats.
Yale: You own a million-dollar home and your EFC is $106,000/year.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We told our kids very early on that it was a public instate college or they paid the difference. Even if I could afford $80,000a year, I wouldn’t pay that for an undergrad degree.

Why did you have kids if you're not prepared to pay for college? We saved the money and paid every cent (full pay) for the costs and all expenses at top 10 schools for each of our kids.

You can be prepared to pay for college but not prepared to pay $80k per year for college. Just like I'm prepared to buy a car but not a top of the line luxury car. Paying for your kid to go to an $80k college is purely a luxury. They can get a good education and solid start in life for half that price. Fine to pay more if you want to and can afford it but it's hardly a parental failing to not to do that.

You’re going to tell you child they can’t go to MIT, Stanford or an Ivy League college because it’s too expensive? I’d mortgage my teeth and take out loans for my kid if I haven’t saved enough.

And sometimes an expensive but less competitive LAC can turn a mediocre student’s life around. Happened to my little brother. He’s forever grateful our parents really sacrificed to pay for his private college.

Yes, I would. Mine know now we did the state prepaid and have enough for room and board and some for graduate school and we will find the money for the rest of graduate school. They are appreciative for that. We have saved since birth, tiny crappy house and do the best we can to save. No loans.

Yes, I would too. That's what my parents told me and my sister. She got into Penn and they didn't think it was worth the cost. She went to a CA state school. I got into some highly ranked privates but they didn't come with enough aid so I also went to a CA state school. We both had good careers and happy lives and did not start in debt. Also, it was lucky my parents didn't decide to mortgage their lives to pay for it -- my dad got laid off halfway through my college years and never attained a comparable professional job (beware age discrimination).

My DS is at VT and will have $$ left for grad school. DD probably does need a smaller, more supportive environment and is focused on less competitive LACs but with merit aid there are plenty that will fit our state-school budget.