Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I look at high school athletics from the perspective that it keeps them BUSY. No time for playing endless video games or getting into trouble. Often, a busy athlete is a better student because they learn to organize their academic life. Bonus: they stay in shape too. Think positive OP.
It's funny that this is so many people's attitudes. I was not a busy kid (teen). But, I also wasn't a trouble maker or a couch potato.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for this post. My DS is early in the travel journey and we're debating whether this is a good decision or not. We already plan so much time around his sports' schedule that I can't imagine what it'll be like heading to SC/NC for weekends, too. At present, the kids all do well academically so I'd like to focus on that. Even if DS is good enough to play D3, what's the point in that? He'd spend so much time in practice and games that he'd miss out on the academics of college.
I think our kids would gain just as much athleticism and love of team sports playing on a lower tier team with less commitment as playing travel. I'm planning to get out while we still can and spend that extra time and money on academics and family time.
How he spends his time in college is really up to him.
While kids activities should not be indulged beyond the families financial or real logistical or time constraints but purposely holding a kid back from their potential only closes opportunities later. I don't know if your son can play D3, D2 or D1 and it may not even matter to him but it is best to let him drive his ambition within the boundaries of what your family can reasonably accommodate.
Nope, not really. If I'm paying for school at 100%, it's not entirely up to him to skip school for sports. And in all honesty, chasing a college soccer dream has very minimal ROI. There is little to no point in this country. Sports are great but academics are better. DS will get far more out of his studies than he ever will with travel sports. And let's just say kid - any kid- is good enough to play MLS, have you seen the average salary for that? Doesn't make any sense to me. Get a degree in a field that delivers a way to have a paying career. Sports only pay their way if you are in the top .001%. So study, kids!
Eh, I'd argue that there are different kinds of ROI. One of my best friends in college was captain of our football team. Did he go on to play in the NFL? Nope, he went into banking. But he left school with excellent time management skills and a HUGE network of friends with whom he's still in touch.
I think that counts for something.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for this post. My DS is early in the travel journey and we're debating whether this is a good decision or not. We already plan so much time around his sports' schedule that I can't imagine what it'll be like heading to SC/NC for weekends, too. At present, the kids all do well academically so I'd like to focus on that. Even if DS is good enough to play D3, what's the point in that? He'd spend so much time in practice and games that he'd miss out on the academics of college.
I think our kids would gain just as much athleticism and love of team sports playing on a lower tier team with less commitment as playing travel. I'm planning to get out while we still can and spend that extra time and money on academics and family time.
How he spends his time in college is really up to him.
While kids activities should not be indulged beyond the families financial or real logistical or time constraints but purposely holding a kid back from their potential only closes opportunities later. I don't know if your son can play D3, D2 or D1 and it may not even matter to him but it is best to let him drive his ambition within the boundaries of what your family can reasonably accommodate.
Nope, not really. If I'm paying for school at 100%, it's not entirely up to him to skip school for sports. And in all honesty, chasing a college soccer dream has very minimal ROI. There is little to no point in this country. Sports are great but academics are better. DS will get far more out of his studies than he ever will with travel sports. And let's just say kid - any kid- is good enough to play MLS, have you seen the average salary for that? Doesn't make any sense to me. Get a degree in a field that delivers a way to have a paying career. Sports only pay their way if you are in the top .001%. So study, kids!
Eh, I'd argue that there are different kinds of ROI. One of my best friends in college was captain of our football team. Did he go on to play in the NFL? Nope, he went into banking. But he left school with excellent time management skills and a HUGE network of friends with whom he's still in touch.
I think that counts for something.
Being captain of football time is not the only way to gain time management skills or friends. The argument here is that the time suck that is sports is not worth it long term to many families, and those who have invested heavily in it come to regret it. So if you can gain same or similar skills (time management from, say, on campus employment) by investing less time and money that's a better ROI. The sad truth is that the majority of kids in travel will not benefit from it as much as they think. maybe the top 10% will but the rest may have been better off playing in local, cheaper leagues with friends.
Well that is the problem, it isn't the "families time" in college, it is your son's. How many other things will you hold over is head to control how he spends his time?
At a certain point you have to let them manage their lives. Offer your support and input but otherwise butt out. Part-time jobs can be just as distracting and a time suck as well.
They have the rest of their lives to hate their career you don't need rush it with a part-time job during college.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:DS here just abruptly announced he's done with soccer after this senior season of club soccer. He's got D2/D3 interest and a standing developmental offer at a small club overseas. As of less than a month ago he was actually considering finishing HS online to take advantage of that developmental offer, that's how serious he was with soccer. He's played since he was 5, been serious about "playing after HS" since age 10...
Like OP, this journey has been one heck of an investment in time, energy, sweat, tears, blood, broken bones, money... This abrupt ending is far tougher on me as a parent than him. He's relieved. The pressure to be perfect, to make the next bigger team is GONE. Coincidentally he's playing great for the club team now.
Like others here have said - Focus on all the good memories from the journey. Focus on the life lessons we learned. Heck, he's chosen to stick with the team this season no matter what, even though it's a "dead end" now.
OP I will have to say, you ending your son's soccer journey for him is not cool... Let him decide. Find a way to make it work next year if he still wants to play that last season.
OP here
I think the question now is, if you had another child, would you do it again?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for this post. My DS is early in the travel journey and we're debating whether this is a good decision or not. We already plan so much time around his sports' schedule that I can't imagine what it'll be like heading to SC/NC for weekends, too. At present, the kids all do well academically so I'd like to focus on that. Even if DS is good enough to play D3, what's the point in that? He'd spend so much time in practice and games that he'd miss out on the academics of college.
I think our kids would gain just as much athleticism and love of team sports playing on a lower tier team with less commitment as playing travel. I'm planning to get out while we still can and spend that extra time and money on academics and family time.
How he spends his time in college is really up to him.
While kids activities should not be indulged beyond the families financial or real logistical or time constraints but purposely holding a kid back from their potential only closes opportunities later. I don't know if your son can play D3, D2 or D1 and it may not even matter to him but it is best to let him drive his ambition within the boundaries of what your family can reasonably accommodate.
Nope, not really. If I'm paying for school at 100%, it's not entirely up to him to skip school for sports. And in all honesty, chasing a college soccer dream has very minimal ROI. There is little to no point in this country. Sports are great but academics are better. DS will get far more out of his studies than he ever will with travel sports. And let's just say kid - any kid- is good enough to play MLS, have you seen the average salary for that? Doesn't make any sense to me. Get a degree in a field that delivers a way to have a paying career. Sports only pay their way if you are in the top .001%. So study, kids!
So here is the thing for all the posters that keep saying that they would want their kid to focus on academics more than sports in college (and the reality is that doing the one does not in any way negate doing the other). Getting INTO college, a decent college like a T1-50 ranked school, is tough these days. Really tough. Many of you may have younger kids so don't see how competitive it is these days. The kids who are gunning for top universities pretty much ALL LOOK THE SAME (which is a good thing - lots of intelligent, focused, involved kids). They all have high GPAs, take AB/IB, do countless hours of volunteer work, lead the drive/charity/organization/small business that they started. They are all stellar students trying to win a limited number of slots (again, if we are talking about top collleges) And so many do much more like on a national level.
So, again, here is the thing: before you put college level sports down saying that they do not allow a student to focus on academics realize that your child can't focus on academics in college IF they don't get accepted into whatever-high-level school they and you want them to attend. And believe me, many kids work strive to attend the top schools. They are more than aware of the rankings. If your child is athletically talented and loves their game that can very well lead to a hook that makes them stand out. Among the thousands and thousands of applications that your kid's application is competing with.
Hey, so maybe don't look down on college athletes too much because beyond working their butts off, the reality is that many got themselves in to some pretty amazing schools; schools you'd love for your children to someday attend.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for this post. My DS is early in the travel journey and we're debating whether this is a good decision or not. We already plan so much time around his sports' schedule that I can't imagine what it'll be like heading to SC/NC for weekends, too. At present, the kids all do well academically so I'd like to focus on that. Even if DS is good enough to play D3, what's the point in that? He'd spend so much time in practice and games that he'd miss out on the academics of college.
I think our kids would gain just as much athleticism and love of team sports playing on a lower tier team with less commitment as playing travel. I'm planning to get out while we still can and spend that extra time and money on academics and family time.
How he spends his time in college is really up to him.
While kids activities should not be indulged beyond the families financial or real logistical or time constraints but purposely holding a kid back from their potential only closes opportunities later. I don't know if your son can play D3, D2 or D1 and it may not even matter to him but it is best to let him drive his ambition within the boundaries of what your family can reasonably accommodate.
Nope, not really. If I'm paying for school at 100%, it's not entirely up to him to skip school for sports. And in all honesty, chasing a college soccer dream has very minimal ROI. There is little to no point in this country. Sports are great but academics are better. DS will get far more out of his studies than he ever will with travel sports. And let's just say kid - any kid- is good enough to play MLS, have you seen the average salary for that? Doesn't make any sense to me. Get a degree in a field that delivers a way to have a paying career. Sports only pay their way if you are in the top .001%. So study, kids!
Eh, I'd argue that there are different kinds of ROI. One of my best friends in college was captain of our football team. Did he go on to play in the NFL? Nope, he went into banking. But he left school with excellent time management skills and a HUGE network of friends with whom he's still in touch.
I think that counts for something.
Being captain of football time is not the only way to gain time management skills or friends. The argument here is that the time suck that is sports is not worth it long term to many families, and those who have invested heavily in it come to regret it. So if you can gain same or similar skills (time management from, say, on campus employment) by investing less time and money that's a better ROI. The sad truth is that the majority of kids in travel will not benefit from it as much as they think. maybe the top 10% will but the rest may have been better off playing in local, cheaper leagues with friends.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for this post. My DS is early in the travel journey and we're debating whether this is a good decision or not. We already plan so much time around his sports' schedule that I can't imagine what it'll be like heading to SC/NC for weekends, too. At present, the kids all do well academically so I'd like to focus on that. Even if DS is good enough to play D3, what's the point in that? He'd spend so much time in practice and games that he'd miss out on the academics of college.
I think our kids would gain just as much athleticism and love of team sports playing on a lower tier team with less commitment as playing travel. I'm planning to get out while we still can and spend that extra time and money on academics and family time.
How he spends his time in college is really up to him.
While kids activities should not be indulged beyond the families financial or real logistical or time constraints but purposely holding a kid back from their potential only closes opportunities later. I don't know if your son can play D3, D2 or D1 and it may not even matter to him but it is best to let him drive his ambition within the boundaries of what your family can reasonably accommodate.
Nope, not really. If I'm paying for school at 100%, it's not entirely up to him to skip school for sports. And in all honesty, chasing a college soccer dream has very minimal ROI. There is little to no point in this country. Sports are great but academics are better. DS will get far more out of his studies than he ever will with travel sports. And let's just say kid - any kid- is good enough to play MLS, have you seen the average salary for that? Doesn't make any sense to me. Get a degree in a field that delivers a way to have a paying career. Sports only pay their way if you are in the top .001%. So study, kids!
So here is the thing for all the posters that keep saying that they would want their kid to focus on academics more than sports in college (and the reality is that doing the one does not in any way negate doing the other). Getting INTO college, a decent college like a T1-50 ranked school, is tough these days. Really tough. Many of you may have younger kids so don't see how competitive it is these days. The kids who are gunning for top universities pretty much ALL LOOK THE SAME (which is a good thing - lots of intelligent, focused, involved kids). They all have high GPAs, take AB/IB, do countless hours of volunteer work, lead the drive/charity/organization/small business that they started. They are all stellar students trying to win a limited number of slots (again, if we are talking about top collleges) And so many do much more like on a national level.
So, again, here is the thing: before you put college level sports down saying that they do not allow a student to focus on academics realize that your child can't focus on academics in college IF they don't get accepted into whatever-high-level school they and you want them to attend. And believe me, many kids work strive to attend the top schools. They are more than aware of the rankings. If your child is athletically talented and loves their game that can very well lead to a hook that makes them stand out. Among the thousands and thousands of applications that your kid's application is competing with.
Hey, so maybe don't look down on college athletes too much because beyond working their butts off, the reality is that many got themselves in to some pretty amazing schools; schools you'd love for your children to someday attend.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for this post. My DS is early in the travel journey and we're debating whether this is a good decision or not. We already plan so much time around his sports' schedule that I can't imagine what it'll be like heading to SC/NC for weekends, too. At present, the kids all do well academically so I'd like to focus on that. Even if DS is good enough to play D3, what's the point in that? He'd spend so much time in practice and games that he'd miss out on the academics of college.
I think our kids would gain just as much athleticism and love of team sports playing on a lower tier team with less commitment as playing travel. I'm planning to get out while we still can and spend that extra time and money on academics and family time.
How he spends his time in college is really up to him.
While kids activities should not be indulged beyond the families financial or real logistical or time constraints but purposely holding a kid back from their potential only closes opportunities later. I don't know if your son can play D3, D2 or D1 and it may not even matter to him but it is best to let him drive his ambition within the boundaries of what your family can reasonably accommodate.
Nope, not really. If I'm paying for school at 100%, it's not entirely up to him to skip school for sports. And in all honesty, chasing a college soccer dream has very minimal ROI. There is little to no point in this country. Sports are great but academics are better. DS will get far more out of his studies than he ever will with travel sports. And let's just say kid - any kid- is good enough to play MLS, have you seen the average salary for that? Doesn't make any sense to me. Get a degree in a field that delivers a way to have a paying career. Sports only pay their way if you are in the top .001%. So study, kids!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for this post. My DS is early in the travel journey and we're debating whether this is a good decision or not. We already plan so much time around his sports' schedule that I can't imagine what it'll be like heading to SC/NC for weekends, too. At present, the kids all do well academically so I'd like to focus on that. Even if DS is good enough to play D3, what's the point in that? He'd spend so much time in practice and games that he'd miss out on the academics of college.
I think our kids would gain just as much athleticism and love of team sports playing on a lower tier team with less commitment as playing travel. I'm planning to get out while we still can and spend that extra time and money on academics and family time.
How he spends his time in college is really up to him.
While kids activities should not be indulged beyond the families financial or real logistical or time constraints but purposely holding a kid back from their potential only closes opportunities later. I don't know if your son can play D3, D2 or D1 and it may not even matter to him but it is best to let him drive his ambition within the boundaries of what your family can reasonably accommodate.
Nope, not really. If I'm paying for school at 100%, it's not entirely up to him to skip school for sports. And in all honesty, chasing a college soccer dream has very minimal ROI. There is little to no point in this country. Sports are great but academics are better. DS will get far more out of his studies than he ever will with travel sports. And let's just say kid - any kid- is good enough to play MLS, have you seen the average salary for that? Doesn't make any sense to me. Get a degree in a field that delivers a way to have a paying career. Sports only pay their way if you are in the top .001%. So study, kids!
Eh, I'd argue that there are different kinds of ROI. One of my best friends in college was captain of our football team. Did he go on to play in the NFL? Nope, he went into banking. But he left school with excellent time management skills and a HUGE network of friends with whom he's still in touch.
I think that counts for something.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for this post. My DS is early in the travel journey and we're debating whether this is a good decision or not. We already plan so much time around his sports' schedule that I can't imagine what it'll be like heading to SC/NC for weekends, too. At present, the kids all do well academically so I'd like to focus on that. Even if DS is good enough to play D3, what's the point in that? He'd spend so much time in practice and games that he'd miss out on the academics of college.
I think our kids would gain just as much athleticism and love of team sports playing on a lower tier team with less commitment as playing travel. I'm planning to get out while we still can and spend that extra time and money on academics and family time.
How he spends his time in college is really up to him.
While kids activities should not be indulged beyond the families financial or real logistical or time constraints but purposely holding a kid back from their potential only closes opportunities later. I don't know if your son can play D3, D2 or D1 and it may not even matter to him but it is best to let him drive his ambition within the boundaries of what your family can reasonably accommodate.
Nope, not really. If I'm paying for school at 100%, it's not entirely up to him to skip school for sports. And in all honesty, chasing a college soccer dream has very minimal ROI. There is little to no point in this country. Sports are great but academics are better. DS will get far more out of his studies than he ever will with travel sports. And let's just say kid - any kid- is good enough to play MLS, have you seen the average salary for that? Doesn't make any sense to me. Get a degree in a field that delivers a way to have a paying career. Sports only pay their way if you are in the top .001%. So study, kids!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for this post. My DS is early in the travel journey and we're debating whether this is a good decision or not. We already plan so much time around his sports' schedule that I can't imagine what it'll be like heading to SC/NC for weekends, too. At present, the kids all do well academically so I'd like to focus on that. Even if DS is good enough to play D3, what's the point in that? He'd spend so much time in practice and games that he'd miss out on the academics of college.
I think our kids would gain just as much athleticism and love of team sports playing on a lower tier team with less commitment as playing travel. I'm planning to get out while we still can and spend that extra time and money on academics and family time.
How he spends his time in college is really up to him.
While kids activities should not be indulged beyond the families financial or real logistical or time constraints but purposely holding a kid back from their potential only closes opportunities later. I don't know if your son can play D3, D2 or D1 and it may not even matter to him but it is best to let him drive his ambition within the boundaries of what your family can reasonably accommodate.
Nope, not really. If I'm paying for school at 100%, it's not entirely up to him to skip school for sports. And in all honesty, chasing a college soccer dream has very minimal ROI. There is little to no point in this country. Sports are great but academics are better. DS will get far more out of his studies than he ever will with travel sports. And let's just say kid - any kid- is good enough to play MLS, have you seen the average salary for that? Doesn't make any sense to me. Get a degree in a field that delivers a way to have a paying career. Sports only pay their way if you are in the top .001%. So study, kids!
Nope, not really. If I'm paying for school at 100%, it's not entirely up to him to skip school for sports. And in all honesty, chasing a college soccer dream has very minimal ROI.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:DS here just abruptly announced he's done with soccer after this senior season of club soccer. He's got D2/D3 interest and a standing developmental offer at a small club overseas. As of less than a month ago he was actually considering finishing HS online to take advantage of that developmental offer, that's how serious he was with soccer. He's played since he was 5, been serious about "playing after HS" since age 10...
Like OP, this journey has been one heck of an investment in time, energy, sweat, tears, blood, broken bones, money... This abrupt ending is far tougher on me as a parent than him. He's relieved. The pressure to be perfect, to make the next bigger team is GONE. Coincidentally he's playing great for the club team now.
Like others here have said - Focus on all the good memories from the journey. Focus on the life lessons we learned. Heck, he's chosen to stick with the team this season no matter what, even though it's a "dead end" now.
OP I will have to say, you ending your son's soccer journey for him is not cool... Let him decide. Find a way to make it work next year if he still wants to play that last season.
OP here
I think the question now is, if you had another child, would you do it again?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for this post. My DS is early in the travel journey and we're debating whether this is a good decision or not. We already plan so much time around his sports' schedule that I can't imagine what it'll be like heading to SC/NC for weekends, too. At present, the kids all do well academically so I'd like to focus on that. Even if DS is good enough to play D3, what's the point in that? He'd spend so much time in practice and games that he'd miss out on the academics of college.
I think our kids would gain just as much athleticism and love of team sports playing on a lower tier team with less commitment as playing travel. I'm planning to get out while we still can and spend that extra time and money on academics and family time.
How he spends his time in college is really up to him.
While kids activities should not be indulged beyond the families financial or real logistical or time constraints but purposely holding a kid back from their potential only closes opportunities later. I don't know if your son can play D3, D2 or D1 and it may not even matter to him but it is best to let him drive his ambition within the boundaries of what your family can reasonably accommodate.