Anonymous wrote:I am raising my children with an idea about how relationships work and those ideas about relationships include transparency, honesty, equality and consent. I am not raising my daughter to be someone else's sex slave. I am not raising my son to expect sex from his wife at his demand. Sex, even in marriage, has to be consensual. Lack of sex, by contrast, is not always consensual. I can choose not to sleep with you even if you don't agree to that.

Yes, it might be that if my kids no longer want to have sex with their spouse, that the relationship might be at an end. I am raising them to be honest and transparent and skilled enough to verbally negotiate the parameters of a new relationship -- whether it be a marriage in which the partners agree to no longer be monogamous or agree to divorce, etc.

My goal is not to raise my kids to preserve a marriage above all else. That leads to abuse.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dramatic much? I have been having an affair for seven years with a guy who is open about the fact his marriage is pretty good, other than the infrequent, low passion sex. He never even said he doesn't get sex from his wife. Neither of us want to leave our spouses in general, and we do not want to be married to each other. We both find the sex and friendship worthwhile and gives us somethings we don't get in our marriages. We have five kids between us. I don't see how it would be better to be transparent and blow up two families than to continue seeing each other. We haven't seen each other since early March, so it's not like we can't live without each other.

Your spouses would be having passionate sex if they were having affairs too. It's the nature of affairs. Do you not understand that?

Long-term marriages NEED WORK. They need time and investment. If they go stale over time, you don't bail and screw somebody else. See a therapist, INVEST THE TIME AND GO TO THE HOTELS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY WITH YOUR SPOUSE--not some other MARRIED PERSON.

And, yes, those five kids will not take it when they find out their mother and father are screwing other people behind their beloved parent's back.

You are selfish. Completely.

Anonymous wrote:Dramatic much? I have been having an affair for seven years with a guy who is open about the fact his marriage is pretty good, other than the infrequent, low passion sex. He never even said he doesn't get sex from his wife. Neither of us want to leave our spouses in general, and we do not want to be married to each other. We both find the sex and friendship worthwhile and gives us somethings we don't get in our marriages. We have five kids between us. I don't see how it would be better to be transparent and blow up two families than to continue seeing each other. We haven't seen each other since early March, so it's not like we can't live without each other.

Anonymous wrote:Dramatic much? I have been having an affair for seven years with a guy who is open about the fact his marriage is pretty good, other than the infrequent, low passion sex. He never even said he doesn't get sex from his wife. Neither of us want to leave our spouses in general, and we do not want to be married to each other. We both find the sex and friendship worthwhile and gives us somethings we don't get in our marriages. We have five kids between us. I don't see how it would be better to be transparent and blow up two families than to continue seeing each other. We haven't seen each other since early March, so it's not like we can't live without each other.

Anonymous wrote:Dramatic much? I have been having an affair for seven years with a guy who is open about the fact his marriage is pretty good, other than the infrequent, low passion sex. He never even said he doesn't get sex from his wife. Neither of us want to leave our spouses in general, and we do not want to be married to each other. We both find the sex and friendship worthwhile and gives us somethings we don't get in our marriages. We have five kids between us. I don't see how it would be better to be transparent and blow up two families than to continue seeing each other. We haven't seen each other since early March, so it's not like we can't live without each other.

Anonymous wrote:Dramatic much? I have been having an affair for seven years with a guy who is open about the fact his marriage is pretty good, other than the infrequent, low passion sex. He never even said he doesn't get sex from his wife. Neither of us want to leave our spouses in general, and we do not want to be married to each other. We both find the sex and friendship worthwhile and gives us somethings we don't get in our marriages. We have five kids between us. I don't see how it would be better to be transparent and blow up two families than to continue seeing each other. We haven't seen each other since early March, so it's not like we can't live without each other.

Anonymous wrote:I don't get the benefit of sending a 3-page letter. That makes it pretty easy for the cheater to say "Look at this crazy person making stuff up. They're obsessed with me.. They wrote a 3-page letter!"

Anonymous wrote:And her and her whore cheater friends loved to discuss their affairs. Wtf?! What kind of women are these?!!

I have childhood friends, HS friends, work friends, a tight knit group of 4 college friends - we all know each other’s husbands. Nobody trash talks them and nobody has talked about having an affair or f@cking guys behind their backs.

But, my friends are all pretty, accomplished, athletes with careers- I didn’t hang around the whore crowd in HS/college.

Classy women these women bragging about their affair partners to friends, comparing dick notes and conquests.

Anonymous wrote:Hey Big guy, when your wife’s friends or family decide to beat the crap out of your AP or shave her hair off like the op described—are you going to come running to AP’s defense ? What if they toilet paper her house and car with “whore” signs? Or are you just using AP for sex and couldn’t care?

Just trying to figure out where your loyalty would be in that situation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And her and her whore cheater friends loved to discuss their affairs. Wtf?! What kind of women are these?!!

I have childhood friends, HS friends, work friends, a tight knit group of 4 college friends - we all know each other’s husbands. Nobody trash talks them and nobody has talked about having an affair or f@cking guys behind their backs.

But, my friends are all pretty, accomplished, athletes with careers- I didn’t hang around the whore crowd in HS/college.

Classy women these women bragging about their affair partners to friends, comparing dick notes and conquests.

I would not call any woman looking for d*ck on the Internet and screwing them in her husband's bed classy. Lol

They like to portray themselves as worldly, enlightened and 'French'...ummm you are on a loser website picking up other loser's just for sex.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, divorce is your friend. Why do you go on a rant on sexlessness when you don’t have to suffer if you get a divorce? This is what makes you selfish and a narc. Just go find someone younger and new who will love having sex with you. Give your wife respect and a chance for a future that she doesn’t have with you. You’ve got one foot out the door whether you realize it or not. Do your wife a favor and divorce her even if it is not the right time for you.

Divorce helps nobody because nobody is suffering. The sexless wife is happy (stays married + no sex) and the normal libido man is also happy getting sex elsewhere. Why divorce a sexless wife over something so unimportant and trivial as sex? That’s the absolute last thing on her list, something she doesn’t even want, it can’t be any big deal that he does that unimportant thing with another woman. That’s actually a nicer favor to her than divorce: if she wanted that she’d just get one herself.

Good point. My DW hates golf. She used to like it, not any more. That's fine, I'll just go play golf without her. She doesn't miss playing golf. I'm not going to get divorced over this.