Anonymous wrote:They lack drive and tenacity to hold a career.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:They lack drive and tenacity to hold a career.
Some people also lack the drive and the tenacity to focus all of their attention on raising children and so they hire help from others to do a lot of work.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:They lack drive and tenacity to hold a career.
This is probably a troll, but I'll bite. My husband makes 15 times what I made when I worked out of the house- and I was a 6 figure earner. Because of how we wish to arrange and prioritize our family life, I am currently at home. If I had been the high earned, he would have stayed at home. There's nothing more or less to behind this choice. Sometimes the decision is just math.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I just see it as a little kid, i wanted and needed my mother's time and attention. Children's psychological development depends on it. Its not the same as getting raised by hired help in a daycare with a dozen other kids.
However, I understand that this level of sacrifice isn't good for mother's professional and social life.
That's why having a kid is a serious decision. Having a uterus doesn't mean one can provide what kid needs.
As a kid with a SAHM, I had too much of my mom's attention, it was often stifling. It was almost a relief when she went back part-time once I reached HS and I had an hour to myself when I got home in the afternoons. Conversely, my dad worked long hours at an in-flexible job and then was always busy doing yard work and other chores on the weekend, so I rarely got to spend any quality time with him.
Just saying, an imbalance doesn't work well either. A kid needs attention from both parents.
You sound really ungrateful. I bet you had a very nice childhood.
Anonymous wrote:They lack drive and tenacity to hold a career.
Anonymous wrote:They lack drive and tenacity to hold a career.
Anonymous wrote:When we feel the need to judge others, specially if we know nothing about them, its an attempt to feel good about ourselves and validate our choices. Pretty pathetic!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:There is SAHM during the early childhood years (until elementary school, maybe middle school at the latest), and there is SAHM forever.
When I see the former, I think - lucky kids.
When I see the latter, I think - lazy mom.
So basically, moms can’t win. Because for many fields, staying at home for several years means torpedoing your career.
Anonymous wrote:Third wave feminism has ruined the American family.
Anonymous wrote:There is SAHM during the early childhood years (until elementary school, maybe middle school at the latest), and there is SAHM forever.
When I see the former, I think - lucky kids.
When I see the latter, I think - lazy mom.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:There is SAHM during the early childhood years (until elementary school, maybe middle school at the latest), and there is SAHM forever.
When I see the former, I think - lucky kids.
When I see the latter, I think - lazy mom.
What if her husband makes a lot of money, and is totally fine with his wife not going back to work? There are still mom things to do for high schoolers - schlepping to activities that don't take place at school, cooking and cleaning, helping with college applications, etc, and doing things like doctor's appointments, vehicle registration, and costco trips during the weekday makes weekends and evenings free for family time. It's clearly not necessary to stay at home to get these things done, but it can cut down on stress. And if neither spouse wants the wife to go back to work, it seems weird for the SAHM to do so if it only increases their HHI by 50K or something.
This is basically my current situation. I'm am bored so I'm planning on going back to work in the fall, but if the increase in household stress outweighs the benefits working, I'll just spend another few years as a SAHM and stave off the boredom by doing substitute teaching or volunteering. That might happen because my job hours aren't flexible. I am definitely not type A, but I wouldn't call myself lazy either.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:There is SAHM during the early childhood years (until elementary school, maybe middle school at the latest), and there is SAHM forever.
When I see the former, I think - lucky kids.
When I see the latter, I think - lazy mom.
What if her husband makes a lot of money, and is totally fine with his wife not going back to work? There are still mom things to do for high schoolers - schlepping to activities that don't take place at school, cooking and cleaning, helping with college applications, etc, and doing things like doctor's appointments, vehicle registration, and costco trips during the weekday makes weekends and evenings free for family time. It's clearly not necessary to stay at home to get these things done, but it can cut down on stress. And if neither spouse wants the wife to go back to work, it seems weird for the SAHM to do so if it only increases their HHI by 50K or something.
This is basically my current situation. I'm am bored so I'm planning on going back to work in the fall, but if the increase in household stress outweighs the benefits working, I'll just spend another few years as a SAHM and stave off the boredom by doing substitute teaching or volunteering. That might happen because my job hours aren't flexible. I am definitely not type A, but I wouldn't call myself lazy either.