Anonymous
Post 05/21/2026 00:15     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

Anonymous wrote:I'm not brand new to volleyball or racism. You don't have to explain either of those things to me. There's no need to defend the coaching decisions of a coach you never met.

Before you write another patronizing essay, think about why you feel the need to do that.


Maybe you don't need the "essay", but at least one person on this thread definitely does. What you call an "essay" was a reaction to the person saying that white people are tired of hearing about racism. The "essay" was meant to educate that person, not to patronize you. It was not meant for people who understand racism.
Anonymous
Post 05/20/2026 19:00     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

I'm not brand new to volleyball or racism. You don't have to explain either of those things to me. There's no need to defend the coaching decisions of a coach you never met.

Before you write another patronizing essay, think about why you feel the need to do that.

Anonymous
Post 05/20/2026 14:10     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

Sad but true.
Anonymous
Post 05/20/2026 12:05     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

Anonymous wrote:This thread took a pretty sharp political turn in the last 2 posts. It’s completely fair for OP to be frustrated if the coach’s rotation and playing-time philosophy haven’t aligned with what their DD hoped for this season. But accusing a coach of racism is a very serious and specific claim.

A coach choosing a lineup that consistently favors certain players does not automatically mean the decision is racially motivated. Sometimes coaches simply settle on the rotation they believe gives the team the best chance to compete and stick with it for the season. Sometimes coaches stick with those rotations, even when they are struggling, because that is also a developmental opportunity. Whether people agree with those philosophies or not, it’s fairly common in club volleyball.

To use a neutral example: if a coach genuinely believed the strongest lineup happened to include mostly red-haired players, that alone would not necessarily mean they were biased against everyone else. Correlation by itself is not proof of discriminatory intent.

The difficult reality of club sports is that no family really knows in November exactly how playing time will shake out by March. That’s why it’s important to ask direct questions during tryout season about coaching philosophy, substitutions, and expectations around development vs. winning. Some clubs emphasize equal development opportunities; others prioritize fixed competitive rotations. Families have to decide which environment is the best fit for their player.

That said, if OP’s DD experienced actual racist comments, harassment, bullying, or differential treatment tied specifically to race, that is absolutely serious and should be documented and reported to both CHRVA and USAV.


I could agree with most of your post. Except that posts got political. When a PP talks about white folks being tired about listening to discussions about racism, that person needs to understand the reality that some people still live every day. White folks don't get it because it doesn't happen to them. Some people need this reminder every once in a while. Otherwise they become entitled to becoming tired of listening to discussions about racial discrimination.
Anonymous
Post 05/20/2026 10:03     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

This thread took a pretty sharp political turn in the last 2 posts. It’s completely fair for OP to be frustrated if the coach’s rotation and playing-time philosophy haven’t aligned with what their DD hoped for this season. But accusing a coach of racism is a very serious and specific claim.

A coach choosing a lineup that consistently favors certain players does not automatically mean the decision is racially motivated. Sometimes coaches simply settle on the rotation they believe gives the team the best chance to compete and stick with it for the season. Sometimes coaches stick with those rotations, even when they are struggling, because that is also a developmental opportunity. Whether people agree with those philosophies or not, it’s fairly common in club volleyball.

To use a neutral example: if a coach genuinely believed the strongest lineup happened to include mostly red-haired players, that alone would not necessarily mean they were biased against everyone else. Correlation by itself is not proof of discriminatory intent.

The difficult reality of club sports is that no family really knows in November exactly how playing time will shake out by March. That’s why it’s important to ask direct questions during tryout season about coaching philosophy, substitutions, and expectations around development vs. winning. Some clubs emphasize equal development opportunities; others prioritize fixed competitive rotations. Families have to decide which environment is the best fit for their player.

That said, if OP’s DD experienced actual racist comments, harassment, bullying, or differential treatment tied specifically to race, that is absolutely serious and should be documented and reported to both CHRVA and USAV.
Anonymous
Post 05/20/2026 08:36     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Hi, can you be more specific about your experiences? I don’t need club info but I want to be aware of what might be going on so that asa a parent I don’t find myself in a position to give a silent nod to any type of discriminatory behavior.


Sure,

It's pretty obvious on out team. We have four kids that never leave the court that just aren't good enough to earn that type of privilege. One has only sat out four rotations in five tournaments.

The first red flag is that the team had only three travel players return from 13u. Only one returned because of location. They brought in four additional kids of color and the rest was filled mostly with players from the 13u lower regional team.

We carry 13 players. Eight white and five of color. The statistics show that six of those players play the majority of the minutes. Also two will consistently have more errors than points. One of those has only left the floor four times in five entire tournaments.

Given it's almost impossible to play a volleyball tournament with only eight players, they will sometimes rotate in a kid of color. Although four of the five kids of color have better stats than the white kids, the kids of color hardly see playing time.

The few times we have won we had four kids of color in the rotation. Although they didn't have the same opportunity to make mistakes as the white kids, we played much better. It should be noted that we had a different coach in all those instances.

As I said, it should be pretty obvious about what's going on. Everyone on the team sees it.

The best advice I can give is to any parent is to watch the old games on Hudl, YouTube, and other platforms. You can see the level of play and progress of the players. The body language of the coaches and players is also a great indicator of potential dysfunction. See if they are coaching the kids up on the sidelines.


I've seen this dynamic in all sports.
White players have "potential" and "upside" and they are treated like the player that the coaches imagine they will one day become.
Minority players are only as good as what they have actually achieved, they are treated as if they have maxxed out their potential.
It's not necessarily overt racism but it is racism.


The inverse happens on our team. Is that also racism? Asking genuinely, as I've never thought of it that way.


This is so ubiquitous that they came up with a name for it: inverse-racism. White folks believe that losing privilege is more outrageous if not equivalent to racism. This is the reason why we have Trump as president: he tells it how he sees it, which means he has a pass to be an outright racist. And that's exactly why all the DEI programs are being dismantled. There is a price to pay for trying to put a cap on white privilege.



Truth.
Anonymous
Post 05/19/2026 14:08     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Hi, can you be more specific about your experiences? I don’t need club info but I want to be aware of what might be going on so that asa a parent I don’t find myself in a position to give a silent nod to any type of discriminatory behavior.


Sure,

It's pretty obvious on out team. We have four kids that never leave the court that just aren't good enough to earn that type of privilege. One has only sat out four rotations in five tournaments.

The first red flag is that the team had only three travel players return from 13u. Only one returned because of location. They brought in four additional kids of color and the rest was filled mostly with players from the 13u lower regional team.

We carry 13 players. Eight white and five of color. The statistics show that six of those players play the majority of the minutes. Also two will consistently have more errors than points. One of those has only left the floor four times in five entire tournaments.

Given it's almost impossible to play a volleyball tournament with only eight players, they will sometimes rotate in a kid of color. Although four of the five kids of color have better stats than the white kids, the kids of color hardly see playing time.

The few times we have won we had four kids of color in the rotation. Although they didn't have the same opportunity to make mistakes as the white kids, we played much better. It should be noted that we had a different coach in all those instances.

As I said, it should be pretty obvious about what's going on. Everyone on the team sees it.

The best advice I can give is to any parent is to watch the old games on Hudl, YouTube, and other platforms. You can see the level of play and progress of the players. The body language of the coaches and players is also a great indicator of potential dysfunction. See if they are coaching the kids up on the sidelines.


I've seen this dynamic in all sports.
White players have "potential" and "upside" and they are treated like the player that the coaches imagine they will one day become.
Minority players are only as good as what they have actually achieved, they are treated as if they have maxxed out their potential.
It's not necessarily overt racism but it is racism.


The inverse happens on our team. Is that also racism? Asking genuinely, as I've never thought of it that way.


This is so ubiquitous that they came up with a name for it: inverse-racism. White folks believe that losing privilege is more outrageous if not equivalent to racism. This is the reason why we have Trump as president: he tells it how he sees it, which means he has a pass to be an outright racist. And that's exactly why all the DEI programs are being dismantled. There is a price to pay for trying to put a cap on white privilege.
Anonymous
Post 05/19/2026 11:18     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Hi, can you be more specific about your experiences? I don’t need club info but I want to be aware of what might be going on so that asa a parent I don’t find myself in a position to give a silent nod to any type of discriminatory behavior.


Sure,

It's pretty obvious on out team. We have four kids that never leave the court that just aren't good enough to earn that type of privilege. One has only sat out four rotations in five tournaments.

The first red flag is that the team had only three travel players return from 13u. Only one returned because of location. They brought in four additional kids of color and the rest was filled mostly with players from the 13u lower regional team.

We carry 13 players. Eight white and five of color. The statistics show that six of those players play the majority of the minutes. Also two will consistently have more errors than points. One of those has only left the floor four times in five entire tournaments.

Given it's almost impossible to play a volleyball tournament with only eight players, they will sometimes rotate in a kid of color. Although four of the five kids of color have better stats than the white kids, the kids of color hardly see playing time.

The few times we have won we had four kids of color in the rotation. Although they didn't have the same opportunity to make mistakes as the white kids, we played much better. It should be noted that we had a different coach in all those instances.

As I said, it should be pretty obvious about what's going on. Everyone on the team sees it.

The best advice I can give is to any parent is to watch the old games on Hudl, YouTube, and other platforms. You can see the level of play and progress of the players. The body language of the coaches and players is also a great indicator of potential dysfunction. See if they are coaching the kids up on the sidelines.


I've seen this dynamic in all sports.
White players have "potential" and "upside" and they are treated like the player that the coaches imagine they will one day become.
Minority players are only as good as what they have actually achieved, they are treated as if they have maxxed out their potential.
It's not necessarily overt racism but it is racism.


The inverse happens on our team. Is that also racism? Asking genuinely, as I've never thought of it that way.
Anonymous
Post 05/19/2026 10:50     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Hi, can you be more specific about your experiences? I don’t need club info but I want to be aware of what might be going on so that asa a parent I don’t find myself in a position to give a silent nod to any type of discriminatory behavior.


Sure,

It's pretty obvious on out team. We have four kids that never leave the court that just aren't good enough to earn that type of privilege. One has only sat out four rotations in five tournaments.

The first red flag is that the team had only three travel players return from 13u. Only one returned because of location. They brought in four additional kids of color and the rest was filled mostly with players from the 13u lower regional team.

We carry 13 players. Eight white and five of color. The statistics show that six of those players play the majority of the minutes. Also two will consistently have more errors than points. One of those has only left the floor four times in five entire tournaments.

Given it's almost impossible to play a volleyball tournament with only eight players, they will sometimes rotate in a kid of color. Although four of the five kids of color have better stats than the white kids, the kids of color hardly see playing time.

The few times we have won we had four kids of color in the rotation. Although they didn't have the same opportunity to make mistakes as the white kids, we played much better. It should be noted that we had a different coach in all those instances.

As I said, it should be pretty obvious about what's going on. Everyone on the team sees it.

The best advice I can give is to any parent is to watch the old games on Hudl, YouTube, and other platforms. You can see the level of play and progress of the players. The body language of the coaches and players is also a great indicator of potential dysfunction. See if they are coaching the kids up on the sidelines.


I've seen this dynamic in all sports.
White players have "potential" and "upside" and they are treated like the player that the coaches imagine they will one day become.
Minority players are only as good as what they have actually achieved, they are treated as if they have maxxed out their potential.
It's not necessarily overt racism but it is racism.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2026 23:06     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

Anonymous wrote:If other coaches at the club are better, I hope you have at least already talked to the club director about your concerns. Sorry you have had a bad experience this season.


I wouldn't let one season determine our direction. I tried to communicate with the director, but she denied everything and admitted she hadn't watched a game. It was bizarre.

Then I was threatened for rocking the boat.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2026 22:56     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, help us all out and please say what club you are talking about? This is troubling to hear happened to you, but the posts are all so vague I have no idea who we should call in (not call out!) to do better.


I am sorry, but the organization is petty. We can't risk being blackballed.


But you are saying you are being discriminated against, and your kid isn't playing regardless, apparently. What would blackballing even look like in this scenario?!



Coaches from various teams talk to each other. You don't want to be the parent that accuses a former club of racism.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2026 21:38     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

If other coaches at the club are better, I hope you have at least already talked to the club director about your concerns. Sorry you have had a bad experience this season.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2026 16:44     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, help us all out and please say what club you are talking about? This is troubling to hear happened to you, but the posts are all so vague I have no idea who we should call in (not call out!) to do better.


I am sorry, but the organization is petty. We can't risk being blackballed.


But you are saying you are being discriminated against, and your kid isn't playing regardless, apparently. What would blackballing even look like in this scenario?!


Let the OP find a new home before you ask for more details.

The OP mentioned that other coaches played the better players in circumstances when their coach could not be present at tournaments. Maybe it's just that one team and other teams in the club have better court time policies.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2026 16:34     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, help us all out and please say what club you are talking about? This is troubling to hear happened to you, but the posts are all so vague I have no idea who we should call in (not call out!) to do better.


I am sorry, but the organization is petty. We can't risk being blackballed.


But you are saying you are being discriminated against, and your kid isn't playing regardless, apparently. What would blackballing even look like in this scenario?!
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2026 13:47     Subject: Teams that are diversity friendly

Anonymous wrote:OP, help us all out and please say what club you are talking about? This is troubling to hear happened to you, but the posts are all so vague I have no idea who we should call in (not call out!) to do better.


I am sorry, but the organization is petty. We can't risk being blackballed.