Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We decided to stay in our suburban house - we don't want to downsize and the kids still like coming home to our house. We like our neighbors and it costs a lot to get a condo - we figured we would be better off paying for ubers if we want to go downtown rather than the cost of moving.

Dumb.

You're missing the whole point. Having to take an Uber every time you wanted to go downtown makes going downtown a hassle and something you're going to have to think about and plan every time. If you're already living downtown you can just walk out the door any and every day on a whim. It changes everything.

And, sure, your kids still "like" coming home to your house but how often do they do it, how long do they stay, and for how long will you put your own life on hold for your adult kids? On top of that, what makes you think they won't "like" having you downtown just as much and probably more because of all of the things you could all do together and all the time without an Uber?

You’re also missing the point that for many of us, we don’t want to go downtown all the time like we did when we were younger. We don’t go to bars and restaurants multiple times a week. So it’s truly no big deal to take an uber when we go into the city because it isn’t often.

You'd go out more often and to more things than bars and restaurants if you actually lived in the city. You don't do it because you have to Uber.

We literally walk out the door to everything. Sure, bars and restaurants. But also grocery stores, pharmacies, coffee shops, doctors offices, post office, banks, shops, parks, museums . . . everything.

Yup!
I get 10-15k steps daily quite easily. We walk everywhere. We can drive to see a show at 6pm and make it to the 7pm show and leave home at 6;50. Want X for dinner, it's nearby. I'd rather have activities and dining nearby than a massive home. 1200 sq ft is plenty for two..

Anonymous wrote:The problem with condos are the fees

Not really. Those fees include things you no longer need to pay for directly:

HOA fees include
Insurance on condo (except our belongings and $25k deductible)
Alarm system (don't need with 24 hour concierge)
All exterior maintenance (no roof, no painting, no snow shoveling,etc)
Hot water heater is HOA managed (central for the bldg so no leak issues)
No landscaping to manage

Once you consider that the costs are not that much. It balances out with what we paid for our big ass house.

Anonymous wrote:Condo in the city hands down! They can stay in a nearby hotel or something. You don't keep a huge house in the suburbs for the three times a year your kids visit you. That's not smart.

This 1000%

You can rent a place nearby when they come or use a nearby hotel.

We downsized and never looked back.

One bedroom in the condo for guests, guest suite for rent in bldg (if you plan far enough in advance) and 5 hotels within 3 block radius.

Anonymous wrote:Fair enough but kids and grandkids probably won't be able to visit if there isn't enough space at your place.

Condos aren’t necessarily small. A three bedroom condo with an office, living room, dining area and two bathrooms is doable and plenty of room for the kids and grandkids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fair enough but kids and grandkids probably won't be able to visit if there isn't enough space at your place.

Oh yes, they will.

My friend just moved to Manhattan this year. Everyone wants to visit, friends, family, people she barely knows are totally IK with the living room couch.

Those people are just looking for cheap loading! lol.

This^. Couch accommodates single college student but not couples with kids.

This.
Have those launched adult kids host you.
And even when they do - still staying in a hotel.

Anonymous wrote:I’d lean towards condo but I recently had to help my dad with damage in his unit. The back and forth with the condo association regarding an insurance claim on the master policy gets tiring.

Living in a big house and handling cleaning, maintenance and repairs costs us a PITA too and expensive.

Anonymous wrote:I say keep the house for a bit and start staying in the city on hotels or Airbnbs to see how much you’d actually be in the city. If it turns out, you spend a lot of time in the city, then start looking around. My thought also is you could bounce from city to city for different events if you stay in your house. NYC for broadway plays, DC for whatever, Philly to meet another interest or need. Maybe Boston for lobster.

Which all is good in 60's but starts becoming a hassle in 70's and more do if one spouse dies.

Anonymous wrote:Our ILs had a big house where all the kids and grandkids could stay (in FL). Our kids are the youngest grandkids (others are already out of college), and when the ILs moved/downsized, we did not have a ton of money, and made visiting too expensive for us for a hotel or AirBnB every visit. Guess what, we didnt visit as much - we just didn't have the money (and ILs didn't offer to cover).

We will be keeping our large house in the suburbs and pay for others to do the maintenance until we need a retirement/independent living community. I want our kids and their eventual partners and kids to be comfortable visiting us in the home they grew up in.

This is a good point. My parents moved to a CCRC (continuing care retirement community) and, while they have a 3 BR unit, they chose not to have either of the 2 other rooms a guest room - just an office and a TV room. For us to visit, we need to fly, stay in a hotel nearby, which, even in the suburbs, is now $225 per night - for nothing! A Best Western type where you make your own breakfast - which is fine, but for $225??? And no pool, no bar, nothing to do after 7:30pm when we leave my parents after dinner. And we go for 9 or 10 nights at Christmas, and a few other long weekends throughout the year. It gets really expensive, especially if we also had to rent a car (we use my parents' 2nd car right now, which is great, but eventually they will sell that). So our 10 day "jaunt" to visit my parents is expensive. And, given that we are married adults in our 50s, it's also weird to have them help us pay for a hotel! Like, we should be able to pay for it - and we can - but paying $3000 for that means we are limited in our non-family vacation budget. And staying in a hotel means that you can't just "hang out" over a cup of coffee - we need to get up, eat breakfast, pack what we'll need for the day, then drive 30 minutes to their home and stay all day. Including if we go out that night, we need a change of clothing, because there are no closer hotels in the suburbs.

I want to try a Air BnB but my husband hates the idea of living in someone else's home. And a 10 day stay might be too long for that, anyway.

So IF you do this, please make it clear that what you are saving in yard and lawn and house maintenance you have created as a fund for your kids to use when visiting.

Our ILs had a big house where all the kids and grandkids could stay (in FL). Our kids are the youngest grandkids (others are already out of college), and when the ILs moved/downsized, we did not have a ton of money, and made visiting too expensive for us for a hotel or AirBnB every visit. Guess what, we didnt visit as much - we just didn't have the money (and ILs didn't offer to cover).

We will be keeping our large house in the suburbs and pay for others to do the maintenance until we need a retirement/independent living community. I want our kids and their eventual partners and kids to be comfortable visiting us in the home they grew up in.

Anonymous wrote:I always thought that we would run to condo once our kids went to college. If we were still in the Montgomery County burbs, we probably would have done this. I loved living in a condo or co op in DC.

We’re on the west coast now and not considering a condo in SF but looking for a 2000-2500 square ft 3/4 bedroom 2/3 bath home instead. Smaller would be fine but we want one that is already renovated/remodeled and almost all of these convert the ground level from a large garage unfinished area to a a very small one car garage area and finished living space with 1-2 bedrooms,1-2 bathrooms, and living/family room area.

SF is too expensive.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fair enough but kids and grandkids probably won't be able to visit if there isn't enough space at your place.

Oh yes, they will.

My friend just moved to Manhattan this year. Everyone wants to visit, friends, family, people she barely knows are totally IK with the living room couch.

Those people are just looking for cheap loading! lol.

This^. Couch accommodates single college student but not couples with kids.

Anonymous wrote:The problem with condos are the fees

Find one with good location but no frills. You'll also save on yard, pool, utilities, cleaning, maintenance etc in a condo as its a small and limited space and enjoy more time outside in a city.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Condo in the city hands down! They can stay in a nearby hotel or something. You don't keep a huge house in the suburbs for the three times a year your kids visit you. That's not smart.

Not all houses in the Suburbs are HUGE. We have a 2,300 sq. feet home. Condo will limit us to a 1,200 or less for the same price or more.

Yes but you'll be able to just go downstairs and walk to shops, cafes, restaurants, museums, holiday markets etc. You can use public transport. It becomes even more useful if one loses a partner and lives alone.

Anonymous wrote:Condo in the city hands down! They can stay in a nearby hotel or something. You don't keep a huge house in the suburbs for the three times a year your kids visit you. That's not smart.

Makes sense.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We decided to stay in our suburban house - we don't want to downsize and the kids still like coming home to our house. We like our neighbors and it costs a lot to get a condo - we figured we would be better off paying for ubers if we want to go downtown rather than the cost of moving.

Dumb.

You're missing the whole point. Having to take an Uber every time you wanted to go downtown makes going downtown a hassle and something you're going to have to think about and plan every time. If you're already living downtown you can just walk out the door any and every day on a whim.

Sure, you can walk out the door. But what's within the 2-3 block area that a retiree (perhaps with declining mobility) can access?

Living in "downtown" DC means you will still have to take Ubers/taxis. Especially as you age. Unless you plan to walk from your condo in Kalorama to the Kennedy Center for a performance, museums or other cultural/dining activities.

Kalorama? Could you possibly pick a worse example? The heart of that neighborhood doesn't even rank in the top 10 most walkable in the city.

We're in our mid 60s and live in a truly "downtown" part of DC with a 99 Walk Score. The only thing we'd ever have to take an Uber/taxi to would be the Kennedy Center, I guess -- but so would virtually everyone else in the DMV given its location. Unless they drive, of course. And unless you're Trumpy you're not going there anytime soon anyway.

Every single other thing that you have listed is within easy walking distance or if not a quick bus or metro ride away. The vast majority of things are within 2-3 blocks, yes.

And, sure, when we're in our 80s it'll be tougher to get around. But that happens to people in their 80s in the suburbs, too. But in the meantime why not live some life?