Anonymous wrote:I'm glad we have finally reached the point where people can recognize that sometimes the one claiming offense is the aggressor.

Lol that the culture of victimhood now includes its own victims as members

OP didn't tell us more about the accuser, so I'll guess that the accuser did not grow up in the US and comes from a culture that is very matter-of-fact about preferring light skin. Even to the point of having well used nicknames for different skin complexions. The phrase "having light" in her culture means having fair complexion.

This is a common generic complement for kids, especially ones who look happy. “He is such a light” things like that.

Anonymous wrote:When I read your title that’s what I thought - so much life in him. I can’t believe anyone took it as a racist comment

Same

In Unity we have affirmations about the light of God filling us. Probably other faiths do refer to spiritual light.

I don't think it's bad either way.

I strongly doubt the colleague meant that he thought the child looked “glowing”….

It sounds to me like he was discussing his skin color based on his race.

I’m sorry.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This was my coworker's exclamation when he was shown a picture of another coworker's son. Speaker is white, mid 50s. He's a decent man with a nice family. Married 25 years, 4 kids.

Parent of the child in the picture is biracial; the dad is black. The kid is very light skinned and appears Hispanic.

Another coworker overheard the exchange and reported the white guy for a racist comment. White guy explained (convincingly) that he meant it in a "he has so much life in him/ he's glowing in health" way.

I believe him 100% and am prepared to go to bat for him. Any reason not to if it is the truth?

I can't even think of any other reasonable interpretation of his comment.

Same.
Until the second paragraph when OP described his light-skinned appearance in contrast to his mom and dad.
In general, even the most racist white people do not tend to offer light-skinned/dark-skinned commentary. They just don’t. If they’re racist, it’s no matter the shade!
But a white person in his 50s may not have any context for why this comment could be interpreted as offensive because they may not have any exposure to the perceived privilege of light-skin vs dark-skin within the black culture.

In any case, someone commenting “so much light in him” is a common way for someone to positively remark on a photo of a child who appears to exude happiness and positivity. The argument that this was offensive is just silly and the “offender” should honestly treat it as such.
As in ge should shrug and say “well that’s unfortunately misinterpreted. I did not and would never remark on anyone’s skin tone.” And leave it at that.

I'm glad we have finally reached the point where people can recognize that sometimes the one claiming offense is the aggressor.

I have a kid adopted from a foreign country.

At the first pediatrician appointment the Dr. said, "you know I have to tell you, I don't think she's 100%"

My heart plummeted into my stomach because I thought he was saying there was something wrong with her, health wise, just from looking at her.

But nope, he was saying he thought she was mixed race from where she was. She didn't look "pure or 100%"

He was old, she's an adult now and he's retired, overall probably about at the right time for him.