Anonymous wrote:Why do moms here care so much about a boy not being able to find friends? If your boy is struggling to find friends at these schools, I promise you he's just awkward or weird.

My daughter found the athlete/ non-athlete divide uncomfortable, and she got a 'bro' vibe from many of the men. Said it contrasted a lot with the women, including the athlete women.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do moms here care so much about a boy not being able to find friends? If your boy is struggling to find friends at these schools, I promise you he's just awkward or weird.

agree, with kinder words maybe.

these schools have 2000 kids. with a tiny bit of effort, your kid will find a circle of 10

my kid quit organized sports at 7 years old, and is happily at a SLAC with good friends, girlfriends, interests, and clubs.

I don't really understand the harder-to-make-friends-at-an-LAC logic, at least when it comes to making friends. I went to one of the biggest T20 universities, and while I certainly had friends, I always kind of assumed it'd be easier at a much small school given the inherent tightness of the LAC student body. In that regard, I felt like I had more friends in my LAC-sized law school than I did in my mega-university. And, in a similar manner, it seems easier make make friends in a small town than in a huge city. (I've lived in both.)

Not at all the same thing as attending a small LAC.

Typically, law schools force the same students to take all first year classes together. Also, all law students have a similar goal, to pass the state bar exam,and to become an attorney.

Small LAC divides are most obvious among athletic teams versus NARPs.

Come on, man. Enough with the sophistry. First off, my larger point about still stands even if you're critical of my law school analogy. Second, most law schools divide each class into several different sections, and those sections (not the entire class) take some of the same core classes together during the 1L year. Third, LACs, such as my kid's WASP LAC do way more community building work than law schools--e.g., living in dorms together for at least the first year, week-long orientation events, club fairs, etc. Fourth, trust me when I say that sharing the same goal of becoming an attorney does not instantly unite law school students into a sense of meaningful fraternity. Fifth, my NARP kid has never mentioned any NARP divide at her WASP and is friends with at least a few athletes. I can't say for certain that my kid's experience holds true for all LACs (including Williams and Amherst), but you've painted with the broadest brush possible.

Williams for sure

I would 100% go for Amherst.

Anonymous wrote:
Trying to figure out if there are really 3 groups of kids, athletes, NARP and a third group?

My daughter refers to herself as an ARP (athletic regular person). Her roommate is a VARP (very athletic regular person)

First of all, know that the choice between HYP and Amherst or Williams will have life altering consequences for your child. The wrong decision could destroy all their future prospects and render them unemployable, unmarriageable, and on a one-way path to skid row.

That being said, I have only ever heard of any student turning down HYP in cases where they went to Bucknell instead.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do moms here care so much about a boy not being able to find friends? If your boy is struggling to find friends at these schools, I promise you he's just awkward or weird.

agree, with kinder words maybe.

these schools have 2000 kids. with a tiny bit of effort, your kid will find a circle of 10

my kid quit organized sports at 7 years old, and is happily at a SLAC with good friends, girlfriends, interests, and clubs.

I don't really understand the harder-to-make-friends-at-an-LAC logic, at least when it comes to making friends. I went to one of the biggest T20 universities, and while I certainly had friends, I always kind of assumed it'd be easier at a much small school given the inherent tightness of the LAC student body. In that regard, I felt like I had more friends in my LAC-sized law school than I did in my mega-university. And, in a similar manner, it seems easier make make friends in a small town than in a huge city. (I've lived in both.)

Not at all the same thing as attending a small LAC.

Typically, law schools force the same students to take all first year classes together. Also, all law students have a similar goal, to pass the state bar exam,and to become an attorney.

Small LAC divides are most obvious among athletic teams versus NARPs.

NARP is not just a word used at SLACs. My kid is at an Ivy and they use NARP too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do moms here care so much about a boy not being able to find friends? If your boy is struggling to find friends at these schools, I promise you he's just awkward or weird.

agree, with kinder words maybe.

these schools have 2000 kids. with a tiny bit of effort, your kid will find a circle of 10

my kid quit organized sports at 7 years old, and is happily at a SLAC with good friends, girlfriends, interests, and clubs.

I don't really understand the harder-to-make-friends-at-an-LAC logic, at least when it comes to making friends. I went to one of the biggest T20 universities, and while I certainly had friends, I always kind of assumed it'd be easier at a much small school given the inherent tightness of the LAC student body. In that regard, I felt like I had more friends in my LAC-sized law school than I did in my mega-university. And, in a similar manner, it seems easier make make friends in a small town than in a huge city. (I've lived in both.)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For those of you with straight males at SLACs who aren't D3 athletes, were your sons on any varsity sports teams in high school? My son is unlikely to be recruited by a high academic school, but a lot of his high school identity is wrapped up being a competitive Soccer and Track athlete. At a big school, he will have plenty of company and can enjoy intramurals and spectating D1 sports, but at a small school I wonder if he will feel excluded from his peers with similar interests.

Williams and I expect Amherst have very active club sports scenes. That’s where I think my three season varsity athlete would likely wind up if he attends one of those two (applying to both).

he won’t get in - that profile is not the succesful non-athlete acceptance at A and W

Anonymous wrote:High school counselor encouraging a SCEA to HYP. Mostly P

Kid is leaning ED Williams or Amherst. But not decided.

I worry those two schools are awfully small for a non-athlete boy, but otherwise don’t care. I do care about FA, but NPC work for all

In the next two weeks, do I try to fit in another visit to Williams or Amherst? Or HYP? We’ve been to all these in last couple of years. It’s possible he thinks he doesn’t have a chance at HYP, which he does. But obviously long shot for all. And so are Williams and Amherst.

Or do I just let it play out without stepping in at all. Seems like a big decision, esp the ED.

If he likes Williams and Amherst better then he should ED to one of them. Why push HYP on a kid who doesn't want that? Listen to your kid please. Jeez.

Anonymous wrote:Why do moms here care so much about a boy not being able to find friends? If your boy is struggling to find friends at these schools, I promise you he's just awkward or weird.

agree, with kinder words maybe.

these schools have 2000 kids. with a tiny bit of effort, your kid will find a circle of 10

my kid quit organized sports at 7 years old, and is happily at a SLAC with good friends, girlfriends, interests, and clubs.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For those of you with straight males at SLACs who aren't D3 athletes, were your sons on any varsity sports teams in high school? My son is unlikely to be recruited by a high academic school, but a lot of his high school identity is wrapped up being a competitive Soccer and Track athlete. At a big school, he will have plenty of company and can enjoy intramurals and spectating D1 sports, but at a small school I wonder if he will feel excluded from his peers with similar interests.

Williams and I expect Amherst have very active club sports scenes. That’s where I think my three season varsity athlete would likely wind up if he attends one of those two (applying to both).

Yes, Amherst does as well. Lots of kids who weren't recruited but still want to play.

Why do moms here care so much about a boy not being able to find friends? If your boy is struggling to find friends at these schools, I promise you he's just awkward or weird.

I think it’s worth visiting again now with school in session. It’s a pain but I bet it will help clarify.