Anonymous wrote:When I got invited to my nephew's preschool graduation, I immediately bought his gift that night, and picked out my outfit. I am so excited for this Thursday! I couldn't attend my niece's preschool graduation because it happened during Covid.

Ridiculous. Seriously.

Spouse’s family seems to use graduations as an excuse for family gathering. So, in the fashion of spouse’s family, we hosted events in large rental and provided food for all, over several days. I would have been fine without any of it. Take kid to dinner. Going to graduations, with rare exceptions, is stultifyingly tedious.

If you want to gather, plan something fun.

No!

Definitely not ^

17:56 again. I’m not definitely saying that you should go. In your shoes, I wouldn’t attend. I’m just explaining what I’ve seen in my family.

I haven’t read the replies, so I’m sorry if you’ve already answers this. But is your Aunt living in a separate part of the country from the rest of your your/her family?

I have an aunt who is exactly like this. Our whole family is from a northeast state and she and my uncle, early on in their marriage, moved hundreds of miles away to a southern state a few decades ago for my uncle’s job. She raised her whole family in the southern state and really romanticized the rest of the family back in the northeast. Over the years, perhaps understandably, she became very bitter that she’d travel back to the northeast for nearly all family holiday milestones but those same relatives rarely came to her state to visit her. As she’s gotten older, her immediate family milestones have become kind of a “let’s see who is going to show up for ME” test. I know this because I’d visit my cousins fairly frequently, simply because I was close with one of them.

Could this be the dynamic.

No. In fact the ONLY extended relatives who get excited and want to go to these things are the weirdos.

No, graduations are boring. However, generally it's not just the ceremony but the after parties, etc. that could be fun. But that doesn't mean you have to attend them, especially if flying is involved. You're fine to say no.