Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:49
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP, what do you mean by social/quality of life? My penn seas DD picked it because of social fit and ability to continue music and be an engineer. She just finished freshman year with a 3.91. The two other top-12 she got accepted to had a similar feel but Penn edged them out with arts and collaboration among engineering evident at admitted days. UVA is very Greek-forward, fewer club spots for freshmen than penn, arts are not easy to do as an engineeri and not at all the quality of life she wanted.
I think by social I mean friendly, laid back kids, lots of parties, lots of hanging out on the lawn. And there is probably some element of wanting preppy and mainstream.
Greek forward is viewed as a positive to her. She is very smart but isn't a striver (if striver means pushing the envelope beyond what is asked) or an academic and she isn't quirky at all. No obscure interests or passions. Little career direction. She is very well-liked, very hard working, and a perfectionist. She has done very well at a challenging magnet school in highest rigor courses. But she is not entering college with passions about economics or philosophy or robotics or anything really.
Your child sounds wonderful and incredibly refreshing in this age of overly curated, overly stressed kids with no joy or social skills. Congratulations on raising a great kid! I'm sure she will thrive wherever she goes and I know this isn't helpful but there is no wrong answer.
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:47
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Your daughter told you her choice. Can you imagine telling her, “wrong choice, you will be going to X school?”
If you did do that, would you be prepared for her resentment if she dislikes your choice next year?
I’d let my kid go with UVA (a very well respected school) and never bring up the other school again. If she keeps hearing the “what if?” , she may grow to resent you.
It’s time to listen to her. It’s her college education and experience.
If you did do that, would you be prepared for her resentment if she dislikes your choice next year?
I’d let my kid go with UVA (a very well respected school) and never bring up the other school again. If she keeps hearing the “what if?” , she may grow to resent you.
It’s time to listen to her. It’s her college education and experience.
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:47
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
If interested in finance then Penn or Columbia probably have better recruiting and placement.
Also UVA Greek life is not something out of state students can just walk right into because they are interested. See the many post from January about sorority/fraternity rush at UVA. Girls want to be in the “top tier” sororities because that’s the only way to get into the fraternity parties. They use door lists so girls can’t just get in like in the old days. Guys want to be the ones throwing the parties. It can create a ton of social pressure and stress that might not be found at Columbia or Penn?
Also UVA Greek life is not something out of state students can just walk right into because they are interested. See the many post from January about sorority/fraternity rush at UVA. Girls want to be in the “top tier” sororities because that’s the only way to get into the fraternity parties. They use door lists so girls can’t just get in like in the old days. Guys want to be the ones throwing the parties. It can create a ton of social pressure and stress that might not be found at Columbia or Penn?
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:46
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Anonymous wrote:OP, what do you mean by social/quality of life? My penn seas DD picked it because of social fit and ability to continue music and be an engineer. She just finished freshman year with a 3.91. The two other top-12 she got accepted to had a similar feel but Penn edged them out with arts and collaboration among engineering evident at admitted days. UVA is very Greek-forward, fewer club spots for freshmen than penn, arts are not easy to do as an engineeri and not at all the quality of life she wanted.
I think by social I mean friendly, laid back kids, lots of parties, lots of hanging out on the lawn. And there is probably some element of wanting preppy and mainstream.
Greek forward is viewed as a positive to her. She is very smart but isn't a striver (if striver means pushing the envelope beyond what is asked) or an academic and she isn't quirky at all. No obscure interests or passions. Little career direction. She is very well-liked, very hard working, and a perfectionist. She has done very well at a challenging magnet school in highest rigor courses. But she is not entering college with passions about economics or philosophy or robotics or anything really.
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:44
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:In this case the schools are largely the same so prestige doesn't matter so the child can choose the more social school without sacrificing academics and prestige.
But in other cases one has to consider the peer group. The other kids might be "fun" but will your kid have a lot in common with them? Will these kids go on to do the same level of things that grads of the higher ranked schools do? For many of us, our college friends are our lifelong friend group and network.
Agree peer group matters for all the reasons.
But UVA students are not at all the same peer group as northwestern and the ivies.
You are grossly underestimating UVA peer group. Grossly.
Top 10% at UVA might equal top 50% at Penn or Northwestern. Just a rough sketch.
My valedictorian, 4.0 uw, 1550 (no prep), NMF with great ECs is at UVA as an Echols Scholar and absolutely loves the school. Found their people (out of state and in-state) who are brilliant, fun, and driven - just a bunch of wonderful, salt of the earth group. Gorgeous campus with every possible resource and opportunity. My kid has thoroughly enjoyed all their courses and professors.
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:41
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Anonymous wrote:Yes, my kid is transferring out of a T20 for a school about 20 schools lower in the ranking pool because they want a better quality of life.
Transferring out of a T20 is code for couldnt hack being average or below.
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:40
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:In this case the schools are largely the same so prestige doesn't matter so the child can choose the more social school without sacrificing academics and prestige.
But in other cases one has to consider the peer group. The other kids might be "fun" but will your kid have a lot in common with them? Will these kids go on to do the same level of things that grads of the higher ranked schools do? For many of us, our college friends are our lifelong friend group and network.
Agree peer group matters for all the reasons.
But UVA students are not at all the same peer group as northwestern and the ivies.
You are grossly underestimating UVA peer group. Grossly.
Top 10% at UVA might equal top 50% at Penn or Northwestern. Just a rough sketch.
That tracks based on available data. UVA pre-test optional had a 75th %ile SAT of 1480.
Penn had 1560 as the 75th and 1470 as the 25th. The top 1/4 at UVA is about the same as the top 3/4 at Penn. You either have a kid who is ready for it and can handle it or you don’t. Since they got in RD to Northwestern and Berkeley they can probably handle it. Challenge leads to growth.
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:39
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yes. He chose UMiami.
No one with a brain chooses Miami over better schools.
sorry your kid didn't get in
best 4 years ever!
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:35
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yes, Alabama over Tulane, Michigan and a few other higher rated schools. Worked out amazingly well, better than we could have imagined.
OP do not listen to this goobley gook no one picks Alabama over a higher rated school.
Not only is that fiscally irresponsible Alabama has no track to networking or jobs. It is full of students from the state with the worst education in the US>
Look at who spoke at Alabama graduation this year (Trump). That might explain it. Too many of those darn libs at Michigan for the MAGA-loving poster.
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:34
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Anonymous wrote:Yes, my kid is transferring out of a T20 for a school about 20 schools lower in the ranking pool because they want a better quality of life.
No they are spoiled and need to come back to their HS friends this will work out great in 10 years they will be low manager or no job at all.
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:34
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
OP, what do you mean by social/quality of life? My penn seas DD picked it because of social fit and ability to continue music and be an engineer. She just finished freshman year with a 3.91. The two other top-12 she got accepted to had a similar feel but Penn edged them out with arts and collaboration among engineering evident at admitted days. UVA is very Greek-forward, fewer club spots for freshmen than penn, arts are not easy to do as an engineeri and not at all the quality of life she wanted.
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:34
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Anonymous wrote:Yes, my kid is transferring out of a T20 for a school about 20 schools lower in the ranking pool because they want a better quality of life.
OP here. Better in what way? Can you elaborate on what their experience has been and what they hope for in their new school? Thank you!
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:33
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:In this case the schools are largely the same so prestige doesn't matter so the child can choose the more social school without sacrificing academics and prestige.
But in other cases one has to consider the peer group. The other kids might be "fun" but will your kid have a lot in common with them? Will these kids go on to do the same level of things that grads of the higher ranked schools do? For many of us, our college friends are our lifelong friend group and network.
Agree peer group matters for all the reasons.
But UVA students are not at all the same peer group as northwestern and the ivies.
You are grossly underestimating UVA peer group. Grossly.
Top 10% at UVA might equal top 50% at Penn or Northwestern. Just a rough sketch.
Incorrect, especially for UVA vs. Northwestern.
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:33
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Anonymous wrote:Yes, Alabama over Tulane, Michigan and a few other higher rated schools. Worked out amazingly well, better than we could have imagined.
OP do not listen to this goobley gook no one picks Alabama over a higher rated school.
Not only is that fiscally irresponsible Alabama has no track to networking or jobs. It is full of students from the state with the worst education in the US>
Anonymous
05/28/2025 16:32
Subject: Did anyone's kid choose quality of life/social factors over prestige?
Yes, my kid is transferring out of a T20 for a school about 20 schools lower in the ranking pool because they want a better quality of life.