Anonymous
05/01/2025 07:26
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
Op clarified error - housekeeper is every other week.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sorry but it’s crazy with two helping kids, full time jobs (ie you are out of the house all day) and a maid twice a week, that you are still drowning in chores. Something feels really off about this!
LOL. If you are out of the house the whole day, working a 9 to 5 job, you really don't have too much time to do all the household chores in a non-stressful way. When you get back from work, you are dealing with dinner and taking care of the kids needs also. Do you think that working women have self-cleaning homes or that stay at home women mess up the house because they are home?
Running a household takes time. Raising kids takes time. Going to work 9-5 takes time. As a sahm, I also outsource and have an involved DH, and becuase I am home we are able to run our household smoothly, raise the kids to our satisfaction, focus on relationships and our health - without overwhelming stress. If I was working also life would have been frantic for all of us.
You don't understand that?
OP has a housekeeper twice a week. So, it’s just laundry and cooking. You can have food delivered. I am a SAHM and outsource nothing. You are privilaged. Most of us don't have your or OP lifestyle.
Anonymous
04/30/2025 21:55
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
Anonymous wrote:OP here, I made a correction early on but it has been lost in the back and forth
Maid comes twice a month.
Things would be SO much different if it was twice a week. A girl can dream!
Have the maid weekly or more. Get groceries delivered, get prepared meals.
Anonymous
04/30/2025 21:54
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sorry but it’s crazy with two helping kids, full time jobs (ie you are out of the house all day) and a maid twice a week, that you are still drowning in chores. Something feels really off about this!
LOL. If you are out of the house the whole day, working a 9 to 5 job, you really don't have too much time to do all the household chores in a non-stressful way. When you get back from work, you are dealing with dinner and taking care of the kids needs also. Do you think that working women have self-cleaning homes or that stay at home women mess up the house because they are home?
Running a household takes time. Raising kids takes time. Going to work 9-5 takes time. As a sahm, I also outsource and have an involved DH, and becuase I am home we are able to run our household smoothly, raise the kids to our satisfaction, focus on relationships and our health - without overwhelming stress. If I was working also life would have been frantic for all of us.
You don't understand that?
OP has a housekeeper twice a week. So, its just laundry and cooking. You can have food delivered. I am a SAHM and outsource nothing. You are privilaged. Most of us don't have your or OP lifestyle.
Anonymous
04/30/2025 21:53
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
My guess is that the “help” you say your kids and DH do is not nearly enough.
-if you are cooking dinner, they should rotate cleaning the kitchen
-whoever didn’t cook dinner and isn’t cleaning the kitchen makes lunches
-everyone does their own laundry (including sheets/ towels). Your DH should probably do more of this
-everyone is old enough to clean their own bathrooms
-everyone is old enough to deal with their own clutter
-2 hours on the weekend for everyone doing the deep cleaning chores
-one person menu plans and the other grocery shops (or orders)
OP, how much of all of this are *you* doing? It should be more evenly spread out if you don’t want to resent your family.
You are
-if you are cooking dinner, they should rotate cleaning the kitchen
-whoever didn’t cook dinner and isn’t cleaning the kitchen makes lunches
-everyone does their own laundry (including sheets/ towels). Your DH should probably do more of this
-everyone is old enough to clean their own bathrooms
-everyone is old enough to deal with their own clutter
-2 hours on the weekend for everyone doing the deep cleaning chores
-one person menu plans and the other grocery shops (or orders)
OP, how much of all of this are *you* doing? It should be more evenly spread out if you don’t want to resent your family.
You are
Anonymous
04/30/2025 19:04
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
Anonymous wrote:RADICALLY declutter your home and lower your standards. Worked like a dream for me.
This!
Anonymous
04/30/2025 19:03
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sorry but it’s crazy with two helping kids, full time jobs (ie you are out of the house all day) and a maid twice a week, that you are still drowning in chores. Something feels really off about this!
LOL. If you are out of the house the whole day, working a 9 to 5 job, you really don't have too much time to do all the household chores in a non-stressful way. When you get back from work, you are dealing with dinner and taking care of the kids needs also. Do you think that working women have self-cleaning homes or that stay at home women mess up the house because they are home?
Running a household takes time. Raising kids takes time. Going to work 9-5 takes time. As a sahm, I also outsource and have an involved DH, and becuase I am home we are able to run our household smoothly, raise the kids to our satisfaction, focus on relationships and our health - without overwhelming stress. If I was working also life would have been frantic for all of us.
You don't understand that?
+1
I was a SAHM, and you can bet we still had a housecleaner once it was within our budget. Now, they typically only came every other week and just cleaned (no laundry), but it was very nice to have a full/deep cleaning done every other week. If you are not a slob/clean up a bit after yourself, the bathroom never gets bad even in 2 weeks (I wipe down counters and scrub the toilet for 30 seconds and wipe down the toilet every 2-3 days).
Me working would have added chaos to the household
Give me a break. OP has clarified that she has a maid every two weeks. Having one twice a week and still feeling overwhelmed by housework would be crazy.
Anonymous
04/30/2025 18:58
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
lol I come to this posts thinking maybe there will be good tips. Instead it’s posts by tradwives.
Anonymous
04/30/2025 18:52
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
Get a grip. Some of us work and do not hire a cleaner. We clean our own house. Step up your game. Each person has household chores. These kids need to learn how to throw in a load of laundry once a week and they can certainly push a vacuum around a room while the other dusts that room. This isn’t impossible. Crank up the house music for 20 minutes and everyone cleans their designated area. Done. ✅
Anonymous
04/30/2025 18:51
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
RADICALLY declutter your home and lower your standards. Worked like a dream for me.
Anonymous
04/30/2025 18:48
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
Bwah ha 🤣 😂 ha ha haAnonymous wrote:OP here, I made a correction early on but it has been lost in the back and forth
Maid comes twice a month.
Things would be SO much different if it was twice a week. A girl can dream!
Anonymous
04/30/2025 18:42
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
I agree with others to have the cleaning person come once a week if she can, and add laundry/changing beds to her list. Can do kids one week, you the following week.
Hire a sitter one evening a week to drive the kids to their activities, that gives you one free evening. Or carpool like a PP suggested.
Hire a sitter one evening a week to drive the kids to their activities, that gives you one free evening. Or carpool like a PP suggested.
Anonymous
04/30/2025 18:38
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sorry but it’s crazy with two helping kids, full time jobs (ie you are out of the house all day) and a maid twice a week, that you are still drowning in chores. Something feels really off about this!
LOL. If you are out of the house the whole day, working a 9 to 5 job, you really don't have too much time to do all the household chores in a non-stressful way. When you get back from work, you are dealing with dinner and taking care of the kids needs also. Do you think that working women have self-cleaning homes or that stay at home women mess up the house because they are home?
Running a household takes time. Raising kids takes time. Going to work 9-5 takes time. As a sahm, I also outsource and have an involved DH, and becuase I am home we are able to run our household smoothly, raise the kids to our satisfaction, focus on relationships and our health - without overwhelming stress. If I was working also life would have been frantic for all of us.
You don't understand that?
+1
I was a SAHM, and you can bet we still had a housecleaner once it was within our budget. Now, they typically only came every other week and just cleaned (no laundry), but it was very nice to have a full/deep cleaning done every other week. If you are not a slob/clean up a bit after yourself, the bathroom never gets bad even in 2 weeks (I wipe down counters and scrub the toilet for 30 seconds and wipe down the toilet every 2-3 days).
Me working would have added chaos to the household
Anonymous
04/30/2025 18:16
Subject: Re:Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Laundry is easy. Put a load in when you wake up. Stick it in the dryer as you leave. Fold it and have everyone take what’s theirs to put away in the evening. 7 loads a week is plenty for a family of four.
These posts baffle me. Do you just wash everyone's sheets and duvets in one giant load? Do you not separate colors and whites? Don't your kids have uniforms that need to be worn? Pets?
I have never separated whites and colors. I only do delicates separately. Everything gets washed on cool.
Anonymous
04/30/2025 17:27
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
Anonymous wrote:OP here, I made a correction early on but it has been lost in the back and forth
Maid comes twice a month.
Things would be SO much different if it was twice a week. A girl can dream!
Thanks for clarifying! That does make more sense.
Anonymous
04/30/2025 17:07
Subject: Drowning in Housework. What have you invested in?
OP here, I made a correction early on but it has been lost in the back and forth
Maid comes twice a month.
Things would be SO much different if it was twice a week. A girl can dream!
Maid comes twice a month.
Things would be SO much different if it was twice a week. A girl can dream!