Anonymous
Post 08/08/2024 21:09     Subject: I think I just have to go grey
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You try going gray. If it ages you too much, you can always color it again, too. Good luck.


yup, be prepared to be ignored except for the occasional annoying you go girl power age gracefully bitter old lady


Promise? This sounds like it was written by someone who didn’t get a lot of attention when they were younger. Sorry if that bothered you.

I got a lot of unwanted attention and I don’t miss it. It’s a relief. If gray hair accelerated the waning, then that is an argument in favor of going gray.

Invisibility is a super power. But maybe that’s just my (former) pretty privilege speaking. Sorry you haven’t come to terms with not being harassed anymore.
Anonymous
Post 08/08/2024 20:55     Subject: I think I just have to go grey
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think gray hair can look really great on a lot of people! If you're worried about it aging you, you just need to focus on keeping your makeup and clothing/accessories fresh and youthful (within reason, of course).


I think the opposite. I’ve seen a handful of people who can pull it off.

If dying is too high maintenance, feel free to stop. But it is the rare woman who looks better with gray.


I’m pretty sure I’ll look better gray than with crazy fly-away frizz all summer, gross brassy shades, grey roots, and spending $400/month at the salon that I can save for a relaxing vacation instead.


I believe that you truly believe that.
Anonymous
Post 08/08/2024 19:21     Subject: I think I just have to go grey
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I use a toning gloss to fix brassiness and to get more time between salon visits. I air dry with a little argan oil and my hair is healthy


But all the toner in the world can’t buy you more than 6 weeks if you have a significant amount of gray roots against brown hair.


And this is why a wig is easier.
Anonymous
Post 08/08/2024 19:21     Subject: I think I just have to go grey
Anonymous wrote:I’m 48 with a lot of grey and I think I’ve had it with trying to cover it. I got a terrible all-over color with horrible brassy highlights a year ago that was much too dark. My hair grows fast so the roots were evident immediately. After a few times seeing that stylist with my hair just getting darker and highlights worse, I found a really good colorist who was able to fix it somewhat with balyage, lowlights and highlights. But it costs SO much, and moreover, the highlights just ruin the texture of my already frizzy hair so I look like a crazy witch in the heat.

I think I’m just gonna go grey. I don’t see any other solution!



Sounds like you just want to give up. Hope you have an exit plan for when DH loses interest. Good luck my dear.
Anonymous
Post 08/08/2024 14:03     Subject: I think I just have to go grey
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I would be gray already but something in the boxed color makes my hair really smooth. The natural texture is frizzy and bottled toners don't help. I wish I knew what it was about the boxed color that does this: I'd stop coloring if I could get it separately.

I have medium coloring, curly hair, and a curvy figure: gray is already tough for me to pull off so it can't be frizzy as well.


NP. You need to find the "Curlfriend" side of TikTok! If you have frizzy hair, you don't have straight hair. You probably have at least 2A/B hair. Frizzy hair (I'm a 3A/B) is usually about the 'misalignment' of hair (meaning they go every whichway) or lack of moisture. In short, you need good products.

Using the right products and the right techniques has been revolutionary for me. In particular, learning how to use a "bounce brush" (after products to moisturize/control) to get my curls to align has made a humongous difference. And, my grey hair looks amazing! I've got young adult girls and if I needed to dye my hair, they'd be the first to tell me. DH likes it a lot as well.

https://www.bouncecurl.com/pages/wavy


^^ This! ^^ And find a good colorist who can help you. Toner will help bring down the brassy color (or get some purple shampoo and conditioner if you can't splurge on a good colorist for now) I'm still highlighting while embracing the silver as it's coming in (age 50) but my highlights are not brassy (finally! I've had some really bad color over the years...)

But def try out different much more moistuziring product to tame that frizz
Anonymous
Post 08/08/2024 13:51     Subject: Re:I think I just have to go grey
^ but my mom and sister went premature grey in their 20s--jet black hair. They both have a brown that looks good. But we all have thick hair--doesn't thin or get brittle. My mom has ridiculously thick hair at 80--so much so she always has to get it 'thinned' a bit.
Anonymous
Post 08/08/2024 13:48     Subject: I think I just have to go grey
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I transitioned to my 90% grey during the pandemic and after a couple of years, went back to coloring it. I hate the time (and expense) of coloring every 4 weeks, but I found I looked very washed out as a grey headed person so I “needed” to apply makeup each day, and more of it than I am used to/comfortable with, and I found that made me feel less than my usual self - vs coloring myhair its original brown makes me
feel exactly like myself.


This is so funny. Exactly like yourself while covering yourself up. “Yourself” has changed. Accept it or be one of those pathetic people in their 50s with obviously fake hair.


WTF?! I am 54 and have so few greys. Just about 1/16th at crown of head. My hair is still naturally deep brunette. My dad never really went grey--got some late 70s but still a lot of dark brown.

I go every 6-7 weeks for a tiny root touch up and gloss. My hair is not brassy since 98% of it is natural.
Anonymous
Post 08/08/2024 13:43     Subject: Re:I think I just have to go grey
I went all grey two years ago and I love it. My face is very unlined and pretty youthful so the Grey hair young face combo is really nice. I’m pretty fit as well and that helps.
Anonymous
Post 08/08/2024 10:45     Subject: I think I just have to go grey
I think it's easier at home than at a salon. I would waste so much time and money going. Even Nice and Easy is actually really good and gives a highlight effect. You have to go lighter than you think. Then touching up is no big deal, so cheap and quick at home. Or the henna solution above. Have not done it but it sounds like a good idea!
Anonymous
Post 08/08/2024 10:11     Subject: I think I just have to go grey
Anonymous wrote:I use a toning gloss to fix brassiness and to get more time between salon visits. I air dry with a little argan oil and my hair is healthy


But all the toner in the world can’t buy you more than 6 weeks if you have a significant amount of gray roots against brown hair.
Anonymous
Post 08/08/2024 02:22     Subject: I think I just have to go grey
I use a toning gloss to fix brassiness and to get more time between salon visits. I air dry with a little argan oil and my hair is healthy
Anonymous
Post 08/05/2024 21:54     Subject: I think I just have to go grey
I'm currently out west where women rarely color their hair. I find those with a good cut and women that are not overweight (rare to be overweight out west) look the best and youngest with gray.

Overweight plus raggedy cut is aging.
Anonymous
Post 08/05/2024 21:37     Subject: Re:I think I just have to go grey
I say go for it. I’m 35 with lots of silver coming in all the time. I started noticing greys in my 20s. I am not interested in dying my hair for several reasons. I’m pretty low maintenance but I have tried different haircut lengths to find a style that works for my hair and makes me feel confident. I also focus on well fitted clothing in flattering colors. I am in good health, good shape and have great relationships. I think of these things and realize that my grey hair is not a significant part of my identity.
Anonymous
Post 08/05/2024 20:37     Subject: I think I just have to go grey
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You try going gray. If it ages you too much, you can always color it again, too. Good luck.


yup, be prepared to be ignored except for the occasional annoying you go girl power age gracefully bitter old lady


What do you mean by "ignored"? Do you mean men don't give you appreciative looks? I'm 58, curvy and stopped coloring my hair during COVID. I don't feel ignored by anyone - but I'm not looking for appreciative looks from anyone.
Anonymous
Post 08/05/2024 17:08     Subject: I think I just have to go grey
Anonymous wrote:After years of routine expensive salon coloring and the shortening interval in which the grey roots would reappear, I went natural. Absolutely, unequivocally liberating.


I did, too. 3 hours in a salon chair every 5 weeks at $300 per visit. I just stopped during covid, and I'm thrilled to be done. Do I look older? Somewhat, but I don't care. My hair is still mostly brown with these chunky silver streaks framing my face, and more than one person has asked where I get those done.

It is, as the PP said, liberating.