Anonymous
06/12/2013 17:14
Subject: Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Anonymous wrote:Sailor Grace
Connor
You are 43 and know that Christie Brinkley has a daughter named Sailor. You named your Sailor long after hers, but claim you came up with it independent of Ms. Brinkley.
Sailor is named because you love the ocean and because you spent the summers of your teenage years chasing after the cute lifeguards at the Jersey Shore. You used to tan, have a spiral perm and wear tiny bikinis. You entered a wet tee shirt contest on Spring Break in Miami in '89! Sailor goes by Sailor Grace, so everyone knows she's a girl. You were thinking that Sailor would be the perfect, gender-less name to put on a resume and possibly cause her to be hired by someone who would have otherwise been sexist. sailor Grace is called by both names, you insist upon it.
Sailor paired with the uberfeminine middle name, is a delightful and clever choice. Too bad every little girl has the middle name Grace or Rose, most especially if she has a boyish or non gender-specific name like Logan or Keaton.
Connor, well that was a name that was trendy circa 1998 and you stored it away until 2002, when he was born. Connor's middle name is James. Connor has a buzz cut and wears basketball clothes to school. His room is a wreck. He skateboards.
Anonymous
06/12/2013 17:12
Subject: Re:Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Liat and Sarai
Jewish. Spent your junior year of college in Israel and secretly look down on people who give their kids more obvious biblical names like Rebecca and Joshua. Belong to a Conservative synagogue, but rarely attend. Live in NWDC of Montgomery County. Drive a Subaru. Have wifi at home.
LOL! Almost spent Freshman year in Israel, but didn't and just did some of the organized young people tours instead
And maybe the last time I went car shopping I test drove a Suburu...
Anonymous
06/12/2013 17:08
Subject: Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Melanie
Terence
You're African-American. Melanie is a Daddy's little girl and Terence gets jealous that his sister gets attention for just being cute while he can only get attention for being good at sports, so he acts out and gets in trouble for hurting Melanie. Dad doesn't know how to interact with Melanie except for commenting on her looks. Both parents thought about how the names would be perceived on resumes, but REALLY loved the name Terence and thought the name Melanie was so, SO pretty. The family attends family reunions every summer where everybody wears the same t-shirt, and meets up at a public park.
Haha. Nice try and good stereo typing effort
I am white, spouse is from Burma ( what? Never heard of it? Not surprised - look it up, yes google earth is your friend)
Wut. "Come in, Rangoon, come in Rangoon, …do you read Rangoon?"
Anonymous
06/12/2013 17:07
Subject: Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Anonymous wrote:Claire and Reid
You're a waspy snoot who wears too much Tory Burch. Your DH wears critter pants and big gold watch and looks like a tool. Even though you have money, you don't read and are very provincial.
Anonymous
06/12/2013 17:04
Subject: Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Claire and Reid
Anonymous
06/12/2013 17:02
Subject: Re:Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Do me. Son is named Atticus.
The person who made you name your son this already did you...and your son too. He'll never forgive you for the name.
You're trying to be literary, but your efforts are painfully obvious. FAIL!
Anonymous
06/12/2013 17:01
Subject: Re:Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Anonymous wrote:Do me. Son is named Atticus.
The person who made you name your son this already did you...and your son too. He'll never forgive you for the name.
Anonymous
06/12/2013 16:59
Subject: Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Anonymous wrote:Rhyann
Kayla
Damon
Lauryn
Go!
Cheesy exurbanites. You park your obnoxious SUV in handicapped spots. You only come in to the city once a year under duress when your relatives visit from Ohio. And then you only walk up and down on the Mall with your big white sneakers and cargo capris.
Anonymous
06/12/2013 16:57
Subject: Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Rhyann
Kayla
Damon
Lauryn
Go!
Kayla
Damon
Lauryn
Go!
Anonymous
06/12/2013 16:46
Subject: Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Violet
Anonymous
06/12/2013 16:45
Subject: Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sarah
Emily
Thomas
You're in your early 40's. You're now a SAHM, but you had a good career and didn't marry until your mid-30's. You met your husband when you lived in the same apartment building in Clarendon. You're beginning to rethink being a SAHM - both because you miss the stimulation of work and the extra money. You live in Arlington, but you wish you could afford to live in DC and send your kids to private school. Your parents have a house on the Cape and you and the kids spend a lot of time up there during the summer.
Ha! Not even close, though it would be pretty sweet if my parents had a house at the Cape.
Anonymous
06/12/2013 16:45
Subject: Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Violet
Anonymous
06/12/2013 16:26
Subject: Re:Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Lucia (Lucy)
You are naturally thin and love to wear high heels, but feel conspicuous if you do so, so you wear mainly flats. You live in DC close to a metro. You had Lucy when you were between 35-37. You attended prenatal yoga classes and childbirth education classes. You work in middle management in an international development organization after getting your MPH (this was after a stint in the peace corps) and your DH is GS-14 at one of the agencies, bringing your joint HHI to just around $200k. Against your better judgment, you will have a second child (Henry), and you will decide to quit your job because DH's pays more and you were frankly bored of reviewing program plans and grant proposals at work, but you didn't want to take on the international travel needed to move up. But this will be a mistake, because staying at home with two kids is more taxing that you thought, and DH doesn't pitch in as much as he should. After the kids are in elementary school you will try to go back to work, but it will be difficult to find a job because your professional connections have grown stale. So you stay home and move out to the suburbs around time for middle school. You join the PTA. A scandal arises regarding arsenic-tainted soil on the local playing field. You lead the charge against the coverup perpetrated by the county and the school district, demanding accountability. Reinvigorated, you leverage your new connections to a position on the local city council. You realize you still have great legs for a 40-something, so you start wearing heels again and putting your hair up. After turning around the city's woeful budgetary status and skillfully navigating between business development and environmental interests, you capture the attention of local Democratic representatives, who ask you to run for state assembly. To your surprise, you win. You spend the next ten years building on your reputation as an environmentalist sensitive to business needs who can balance the need for development with the need to protect the wildlife. At the end of your three terms in office, facing Lucy and Henry's college tuition bills, you go to work for a K street consulting firm lobbying for giant oil companies, where you leverage your environmental credibility to water down environmental reforms, and become rich. You then retire to Aspen.
THE END.
oh Lordy, I saw that one on Lifetime.
Anonymous
06/12/2013 16:20
Subject: Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Christina
Andrew
Gretchen
Anyone?
That you're not bright enough to know that Gretchen isn't a real name, just the shortening of one. And doesn't remotely match the previous ones.
Trying to hard to match some ethnicity....that isn't matched by Andrew. Gretchen is German short form of Margarete. Andreas is German form of Andrew. Christina is mispelled if it's German.
Just Nononononono.
You're so funny. In that "ridiculous" funny way. That's my name (Christina) and Andrew and Gretchen are my siblings' names. We're in our 30s and 40s. My mom had German parents, so she knew full well that Gretchen is indeed a "real" name, and indeed that it's a diminutive of Margarete, but can of course stand alone. But you know what, Mom grew up on Long Island, so she's first generation American. And she liked the names Christina and Andrew. It's not that complicated. Aber du weisst das schon. Thanks for trying.
Anonymous
06/12/2013 16:18
Subject: Re:Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:DC1: Thomas
DC2: Richard
DC3: Sarah
If DC3 was a boy, would he be called Harry?
That was brilliant!
Not PP, but I saw it, too - I was surprised others didn't