Anonymous
03/28/2024 12:35
Subject: Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
I am very, very liberal. Except in marriage. I couldn’t wait tot take my husband’s last name. I don’t judge that disagree. This is what I wanted and lines with the values of our relationship.
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:49
Subject: Re:Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
Anonymous wrote:I changed mine for 2 reasons: a) I liked my husband's surname better than mine. b) I like my husband's father and family better than I like my own father and family. my dad is an abusive narcissistic a-hole and his whole family is completely dysfunctional. My FIL is a kind, sweet, gentle, loving person and his family is as well. I'd much rather be associated w/ my in laws than my own parents. Plus their name is just better in my opinion. I never liked my "maiden" name.
Any reason that a woman has for changing or not changing her name is legitimate, and no one needs to defend themselves to OP or anyone else.
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:48
Subject: Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
It’s very provincial.
Changing your name after marriage is not a common practice world wide. In a lot of instances, a husband and wife sharing a surname signals an incestuous relationship.
However, if you’ve never travelled out of the United Stares, I can see how one could assume this practice is universal. This is no different than a villager from a remote village assuming everyone practices female genital mutilation because it’s all they know.
Changing your name after marriage is not a common practice world wide. In a lot of instances, a husband and wife sharing a surname signals an incestuous relationship.
However, if you’ve never travelled out of the United Stares, I can see how one could assume this practice is universal. This is no different than a villager from a remote village assuming everyone practices female genital mutilation because it’s all they know.
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:40
Subject: Re:Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
I changed mine for 2 reasons: a) I liked my husband's surname better than mine. b) I like my husband's father and family better than I like my own father and family. my dad is an abusive narcissistic a-hole and his whole family is completely dysfunctional. My FIL is a kind, sweet, gentle, loving person and his family is as well. I'd much rather be associated w/ my in laws than my own parents. Plus their name is just better in my opinion. I never liked my "maiden" name.
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:33
Subject: Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
I have my moms last name, and kept it. My husband was very supportive.
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:30
Subject: Re:Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
Anonymous wrote:A neighbor, male, hyphenated his last name after he got married. Such a beta.
Of course he is. Changing your name when your partner doesn't is a sign of submission. That's why as a woman I would never change mine unless both are changing it.
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:24
Subject: Re:Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
Anonymous wrote:A neighbor, male, hyphenated his last name after he got married. Such a beta.
People who call people alphas and betas are usually insecure pussies, just fyi
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:21
Subject: Re:Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
A neighbor, male, hyphenated his last name after he got married. Such a beta.
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:16
Subject: Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don’t change my name and I never would. It’s my name. And women do t have to justify it with a “big fancy career” either. I love my name. My husband doesn’t care. OP tell why women should change their name? It’s a relic of a time when women were property of their husbands.
Whose last name do your kids have? Their Dad’s? Just like you?
Newsflash: unless last names start being passed down the maternal side, your last name is STILL just the name of a man who has “owned” you.
DP. Please stop with this sad excuse of an "argument". Yes, most people in the US have their father's name, which they were given at birth with no input of their own, so why do women, but not men, are expected to make yet another name change to that of their father in law's?
By the way, I have my mom's and my dad's and if I have children I will give them my husband's and one of mine.
It’s not a sad excuse for an argument, it’s reality. If you’re really a feminist you’ll give your kids YOUR last name. Go on, smash the patriarchy!
Or continue to take the path of least resistance (keep your name) while not making any meaningful change (because that would actually be difficult to get your kids’ father/society onboard) and pat yourself on the back for being such a dutiful little “feminist”.
Please
Your creepy obsession with your father in law’s name is weird…
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:12
Subject: Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
Anonymous wrote:I kept my name and my kids carry my last name and we have a great marriage and my husband is awesome. Very hard to comprehend for some. Oh well.
Us too. Sailing along for 40 years now.
Meanwhile I have friends who are on their 3rd last name! It's so dumb.
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:12
Subject: Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don’t change my name and I never would. It’s my name. And women do t have to justify it with a “big fancy career” either. I love my name. My husband doesn’t care. OP tell why women should change their name? It’s a relic of a time when women were property of their husbands.
Whose last name do your kids have? Their Dad’s? Just like you?
Newsflash: unless last names start being passed down the maternal side, your last name is STILL just the name of a man who has “owned” you.
DP. Please stop with this sad excuse of an "argument". Yes, most people in the US have their father's name, which they were given at birth with no input of their own, so why do women, but not men, are expected to make yet another name change to that of their father in law's?
By the way, I have my mom's and my dad's and if I have children I will give them my husband's and one of mine.
It’s not a sad excuse for an argument, it’s reality. If you’re really a feminist you’ll give your kids YOUR last name. Go on, smash the patriarchy!
Or continue to take the path of least resistance (keep your name) while not making any meaningful change (because that would actually be difficult to get your kids’ father/society onboard) and pat yourself on the back for being such a dutiful little “feminist”.
Please
Did you read my comment? I would give my children BOTH surnames like they do in Spanish speaking countries. Feminism is about equality, not about substituting the man's name for the woman's.
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:03
Subject: Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
I kept my name and my kids carry my last name and we have a great marriage and my husband is awesome. Very hard to comprehend for some. Oh well.
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:02
Subject: Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don’t change my name and I never would. It’s my name. And women do t have to justify it with a “big fancy career” either. I love my name. My husband doesn’t care. OP tell why women should change their name? It’s a relic of a time when women were property of their husbands.
Whose last name do your kids have? Their Dad’s? Just like you?
Newsflash: unless last names start being passed down the maternal side, your last name is STILL just the name of a man who has “owned” you.
DP. Please stop with this sad excuse of an "argument". Yes, most people in the US have their father's name, which they were given at birth with no input of their own, so why do women, but not men, are expected to make yet another name change to that of their father in law's?
By the way, I have my mom's and my dad's and if I have children I will give them my husband's and one of mine.
It’s not a sad excuse for an argument, it’s reality. If you’re really a feminist you’ll give your kids YOUR last name. Go on, smash the patriarchy!
Or continue to take the path of least resistance (keep your name) while not making any meaningful change (because that would actually be difficult to get your kids’ father/society onboard) and pat yourself on the back for being such a dutiful little “feminist”.
Please
Anonymous
03/28/2024 11:00
Subject: Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
#notlikeothergirls
You’re like so cool and special OP, your man is so lucky to have found you!!!
Anonymous
03/28/2024 10:58
Subject: Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?
Anonymous wrote:People may think you are a divorcee or a difficult person if you haven't taken the last name. I said the silent part out loud, it does matter
Maybe I am a difficult person so what