Anonymous wrote:Having kids

+10000000

Every day is a sacrifice. If I didn’t have kids I could travel freely, enjoy my hobbies, not have stretch marks on my stomach, be more successful professionally and have a lot more money.

I love my kids, but if I hadn’t had them I wouldn’t know this, and it’s simply a lower QOL to have kids

Not divorcing my husband. He was (is) an alcoholic and was abusing me for years. Also, his family dislikes me. For whatever reason I felt the need to stay together and make it work.

Having kids

Not doing premarital counseling before marriage.
Not dating my best friend in college.
Not branching out socially earlier, when kids were younger.
Not really knowing myself until middle age.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Regret not dumping my college boyfriend earlier and letting him strung me along for four more years. Eventually met a good guy and got married, but by then my fertility was shot and we couldn't have kids.

Don't waste your time in your 20s on anyone who doesn't know if you are "the one" after a year or so.

This may have saved you from the regret of having kids, which sucks for a lot more than 4 years.

And another awful person has joined the chat.

Figuring out how to deal with crippling depression and social anxiety. You would never guess this by interacting with me. I hide it well. The feeling that I am not good enough for dating and the work world has haunted me for decades.

Having an affair

Anonymous wrote:I regret drinking so much throughout my thirties.
Got it together in my forties, thank god.

Did drinking produce a lot of wrinkles?

I regret drinking so much throughout my thirties.
Got it together in my forties, thank god.

Anonymous wrote:Marrying my husband. Other than our children, it’s been an increasing misery. Time to divorce.

Same here. Such a deadweight.

Anonymous wrote:Regret not dumping my college boyfriend earlier and letting him strung me along for four more years. Eventually met a good guy and got married, but by then my fertility was shot and we couldn't have kids.

Don't waste your time in your 20s on anyone who doesn't know if you are "the one" after a year or so.

This may have saved you from the regret of having kids, which sucks for a lot more than 4 years.

Not moving out of DC earlier

Anonymous wrote:I regret not accepting the IB job on Wall Street out of college. Instead I chose a path as a drone in corporate America to stay closer to my dysfunctional and limiting family who never dare to dream. Wasted potential. Changed the trajectory of my entire life, and I regret that decision every day.

How do I get past this? Already done therapy for the family stuff.

Two things:

1. Surely there are things you enjoy about your life as it is. Try to notice them, appreciate them.

2. If you feel like you're not where you want to be, identify - to the extent possible - where you would like to be. Or where it's realistic for you to get to from where you are now. Then start working toward that. Part of what drags us all down is feeling stuck but not having any sense of how to get unstuck. Work on that!

Anonymous wrote:Regret not dumping my college boyfriend earlier and letting him strung me along for four more years. Eventually met a good guy and got married, but by then my fertility was shot and we couldn't have kids.

Don't waste your time in your 20s on anyone who doesn't know if you are "the one" after a year or so.

So sorry and this is so true.

Not staying with my mom overnight in the the night she died. She had a routine surgery and was in a lot of pain afterwards. I planned to sit in the chair with her overnight but I suddenly got very ill and went home instead because I was sick and exhausted. Suddenly, around 2:15 a.m., I woke up and couldn’t figure out why and I thought “I hope that is not my mom coming to say bye to me.” And then dozed back to sleep. While sleeping, I got a call a little after 3:00 a.m. that my mom was having a “critical event.” When I finally arrived and I saw the medical staffs' faces, I knew she had died. I feel like overnight they did something wrong and if I had been there, I would have been able to catch it or push them to act more quickly.