Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Taylor is too nice to say it out loud so let’s acknowledge the truth for her: if SHE walked past Garret in a bar, she would not have given HIM a second look.

Taylor is really not all that. More of a niche preference than a universal rock star. I don't get the fawning over her. Typical DC climate policy analyst; big deal.

+1

Anonymous wrote:Taylor is too nice to say it out loud so let’s acknowledge the truth for her: if SHE walked past Garret in a bar, she would not have given HIM a second look.

Taylor is really not all that. More of a niche preference than a universal rock star. I don't get the fawning over her. Typical DC climate policy analyst; big deal.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone up-thread said they thought Garrett wasn’t into Taylor anymore. Why?
I thought his body language was still good on reunion show.
Is it just bc they no longer have plans to move to San Diego??

That was me.

It’s a very slight change in his voice and also in his eyes; the sparkle is gone. My guess is that his family (mom in particular) made things very stressful for him, and he fell into a mild depressive state over the potential move to San Diego. That and/or he was on mood-stabilizing meds.

From the beginning, Garret’s mom gave off a vibe that is very familiar to me but hard to put into words. I’m mixed race, half-white like Taylor and often get the same type of closed-off reaction from certain people. It’s not necessarily racism, just other-ism, perhaps. Par for the course in life-long F’burg families.

The fact that Fong and husband flew cross country to appear on the reunion show, yet Garrent’s parents didn’t bother to make the one hour drive, speaks volumes. If I remember correctly, Taylor’s dad didn’t even want to appear on the show in the beginning.

Re the bolded, I understand exactly what you mean because my mother was that way. She looked down upon and was suspicious of anyone not from the US and/or not fully white. I'm so sorry for people like my mom. All I can say to console you is that I am not like that and that sort of racism in our family is ending with her generation.

Thanks for acknowledging this and working to change it. Curious: what do you think people like your mother are suspicious of exactly?

Well, anyone who's different or in some way is better than she is. Different is scary. She also looked down on the white woman who lived two doors away from us who would "prance up and down her driveway in a bikini pretending to get the newspaper all morning." But my mom was fat and the neighbor looked great in a bikini so it seemed like jealousy to teenage-me. When I looked through my mom's old photo albums from when she was in school, I thought it was kind of weird that she lived in NYC but all her friends were white. She also had an education that stopped after college and so didn't know about some things that were proven after that point in her life - like black people don't have a higher pain tolerance than white people, for example. Or that I couldn't get AIDS from being around a gay person if I had a paper cut. She didn't seek out people different from herself - as an adult all her friends were again, white. When I was growing up the only non-white people who came into our house were kids my brother and I made friends with.

DP-this is just proof that these white Americans who treat “others” badly are just ignorant and jealous.

Only white Americans who treat others badly?

Look in the mirror. You hold your own biases against people who are different.

So you’re going with whataboutism and calling everyone racist to protect racist whites? Typical defensive, ignorant behavior. And not all of us are bigoted.

Not all are, but you definitely are.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone up-thread said they thought Garrett wasn’t into Taylor anymore. Why?
I thought his body language was still good on reunion show.
Is it just bc they no longer have plans to move to San Diego??

That was me.

It’s a very slight change in his voice and also in his eyes; the sparkle is gone. My guess is that his family (mom in particular) made things very stressful for him, and he fell into a mild depressive state over the potential move to San Diego. That and/or he was on mood-stabilizing meds.

From the beginning, Garret’s mom gave off a vibe that is very familiar to me but hard to put into words. I’m mixed race, half-white like Taylor and often get the same type of closed-off reaction from certain people. It’s not necessarily racism, just other-ism, perhaps. Par for the course in life-long F’burg families.

The fact that Fong and husband flew cross country to appear on the reunion show, yet Garrent’s parents didn’t bother to make the one hour drive, speaks volumes. If I remember correctly, Taylor’s dad didn’t even want to appear on the show in the beginning.

Re the bolded, I understand exactly what you mean because my mother was that way. She looked down upon and was suspicious of anyone not from the US and/or not fully white. I'm so sorry for people like my mom. All I can say to console you is that I am not like that and that sort of racism in our family is ending with her generation.

Thanks for acknowledging this and working to change it. Curious: what do you think people like your mother are suspicious of exactly?

Well, anyone who's different or in some way is better than she is. Different is scary. She also looked down on the white woman who lived two doors away from us who would "prance up and down her driveway in a bikini pretending to get the newspaper all morning." But my mom was fat and the neighbor looked great in a bikini so it seemed like jealousy to teenage-me. When I looked through my mom's old photo albums from when she was in school, I thought it was kind of weird that she lived in NYC but all her friends were white. She also had an education that stopped after college and so didn't know about some things that were proven after that point in her life - like black people don't have a higher pain tolerance than white people, for example. Or that I couldn't get AIDS from being around a gay person if I had a paper cut. She didn't seek out people different from herself - as an adult all her friends were again, white. When I was growing up the only non-white people who came into our house were kids my brother and I made friends with.

Very interesting that this fits exactly with the conclusion that I’ve come to after my 40+ years of first-hand experiences being a mixed race person of a minority religion, living in both the deep South and in the North. Being surrounded by the same type of people, whether by choice or not, is the one common denominator of all the people that have acted differently towards me. Think US military, country clubs, private school upbringing.

Income, education level, sexual orientation, social class, etc: this other-ism behavior crosses all of those. Even political ideology.

It seems mostly driven by a fear of the unknown and an inability or unwillingness to relate to me. You should see the look on these people’s faces when I drop my (white) family lineage that includes military honors from the Civil War thru WWII, among other “I’m like you” things. Makes me cringe then chuckle then go about trying to open their eyes to the real world.

Hopefully, Taylor can stay positive and is up for the challenge of changing the world, one stand offish/close minded in-law at a time. Her ethnicity tactic in the pod gives me hope that she knows what she’s up against.

Are you saying the US Military lacks diversity? Because that's....completely false.

Taylor is too nice to say it out loud so let’s acknowledge the truth for her: if SHE walked past Garret in a bar, she would not have given HIM a second look.

By the way, someone should write a research paper on that pod tactic, focusing on Garret’s immediate facial reaction and verbal response.

You could actually see and hear his fear of the “unknown,” aka a SO that wasn’t caucasian, blonde w/ blue eyes. Props to him for fighting off that uncomfortable feeling and taking a chance to learn and grow.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone up-thread said they thought Garrett wasn’t into Taylor anymore. Why?
I thought his body language was still good on reunion show.
Is it just bc they no longer have plans to move to San Diego??

That was me.

It’s a very slight change in his voice and also in his eyes; the sparkle is gone. My guess is that his family (mom in particular) made things very stressful for him, and he fell into a mild depressive state over the potential move to San Diego. That and/or he was on mood-stabilizing meds.

From the beginning, Garret’s mom gave off a vibe that is very familiar to me but hard to put into words. I’m mixed race, half-white like Taylor and often get the same type of closed-off reaction from certain people. It’s not necessarily racism, just other-ism, perhaps. Par for the course in life-long F’burg families.

The fact that Fong and husband flew cross country to appear on the reunion show, yet Garrent’s parents didn’t bother to make the one hour drive, speaks volumes. If I remember correctly, Taylor’s dad didn’t even want to appear on the show in the beginning.

Re the bolded, I understand exactly what you mean because my mother was that way. She looked down upon and was suspicious of anyone not from the US and/or not fully white. I'm so sorry for people like my mom. All I can say to console you is that I am not like that and that sort of racism in our family is ending with her generation.

Thanks for acknowledging this and working to change it. Curious: what do you think people like your mother are suspicious of exactly?

Well, anyone who's different or in some way is better than she is. Different is scary. She also looked down on the white woman who lived two doors away from us who would "prance up and down her driveway in a bikini pretending to get the newspaper all morning." But my mom was fat and the neighbor looked great in a bikini so it seemed like jealousy to teenage-me. When I looked through my mom's old photo albums from when she was in school, I thought it was kind of weird that she lived in NYC but all her friends were white. She also had an education that stopped after college and so didn't know about some things that were proven after that point in her life - like black people don't have a higher pain tolerance than white people, for example. Or that I couldn't get AIDS from being around a gay person if I had a paper cut. She didn't seek out people different from herself - as an adult all her friends were again, white. When I was growing up the only non-white people who came into our house were kids my brother and I made friends with.

Very interesting that this fits exactly with the conclusion that I’ve come to after my 40+ years of first-hand experiences being a mixed race person of a minority religion, living in both the deep South and in the North. Being surrounded by the same type of people, whether by choice or not, is the one common denominator of all the people that have acted differently towards me. Think US military, country clubs, private school upbringing.

Income, education level, sexual orientation, social class, etc: this other-ism behavior crosses all of those. Even political ideology.

It seems mostly driven by a fear of the unknown and an inability or unwillingness to relate to me. You should see the look on these people’s faces when I drop my (white) family lineage that includes military honors from the Civil War thru WWII, among other “I’m like you” things. Makes me cringe then chuckle then go about trying to open their eyes to the real world.

Hopefully, Taylor can stay positive and is up for the challenge of changing the world, one stand offish/close minded in-law at a time. Her ethnicity tactic in the pod gives me hope that she knows what she’s up against.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Alex's hair looks the best of everyone on the reunion. It was healthy and a great length and complimented her bone structure, etc. Vanessa Lachey's hair looks the worst - I know she can do better. Maybe her hair stylist wasn't available? It just looked limp and messy.

(Taylor's hair also looked great.)

I loved Ashley’s hair. She looked amazing!

Ashley's hair was the best part of the show! So flattering. She looked great.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone up-thread said they thought Garrett wasn’t into Taylor anymore. Why?
I thought his body language was still good on reunion show.
Is it just bc they no longer have plans to move to San Diego??

That was me.

It’s a very slight change in his voice and also in his eyes; the sparkle is gone. My guess is that his family (mom in particular) made things very stressful for him, and he fell into a mild depressive state over the potential move to San Diego. That and/or he was on mood-stabilizing meds.

From the beginning, Garret’s mom gave off a vibe that is very familiar to me but hard to put into words. I’m mixed race, half-white like Taylor and often get the same type of closed-off reaction from certain people. It’s not necessarily racism, just other-ism, perhaps. Par for the course in life-long F’burg families.

The fact that Fong and husband flew cross country to appear on the reunion show, yet Garrent’s parents didn’t bother to make the one hour drive, speaks volumes. If I remember correctly, Taylor’s dad didn’t even want to appear on the show in the beginning.

Re the bolded, I understand exactly what you mean because my mother was that way. She looked down upon and was suspicious of anyone not from the US and/or not fully white. I'm so sorry for people like my mom. All I can say to console you is that I am not like that and that sort of racism in our family is ending with her generation.

Thanks for acknowledging this and working to change it. Curious: what do you think people like your mother are suspicious of exactly?

Well, anyone who's different or in some way is better than she is. Different is scary. She also looked down on the white woman who lived two doors away from us who would "prance up and down her driveway in a bikini pretending to get the newspaper all morning." But my mom was fat and the neighbor looked great in a bikini so it seemed like jealousy to teenage-me. When I looked through my mom's old photo albums from when she was in school, I thought it was kind of weird that she lived in NYC but all her friends were white. She also had an education that stopped after college and so didn't know about some things that were proven after that point in her life - like black people don't have a higher pain tolerance than white people, for example. Or that I couldn't get AIDS from being around a gay person if I had a paper cut. She didn't seek out people different from herself - as an adult all her friends were again, white. When I was growing up the only non-white people who came into our house were kids my brother and I made friends with.

DP-this is just proof that these white Americans who treat “others” badly are just ignorant and jealous.

Only white Americans who treat others badly?

Look in the mirror. You hold your own biases against people who are different.

So you’re going with whataboutism and calling everyone racist to protect racist whites? Typical defensive, ignorant behavior. And not all of us are bigoted.

Anonymous wrote:I didn't recognize AD until they said her name or Nancy until she spoke. I wonder if Marshall will be on the next Perfect Match

Actually, AD will likely be on and met her current guy there...

https://www.distractify.com/p/who-is-ad-love-is-blind-dating?utm_campaign=trueanthem&utm_medium=social&utm_source=threads

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone up-thread said they thought Garrett wasn’t into Taylor anymore. Why?
I thought his body language was still good on reunion show.
Is it just bc they no longer have plans to move to San Diego??

That was me.

It’s a very slight change in his voice and also in his eyes; the sparkle is gone. My guess is that his family (mom in particular) made things very stressful for him, and he fell into a mild depressive state over the potential move to San Diego. That and/or he was on mood-stabilizing meds.

From the beginning, Garret’s mom gave off a vibe that is very familiar to me but hard to put into words. I’m mixed race, half-white like Taylor and often get the same type of closed-off reaction from certain people. It’s not necessarily racism, just other-ism, perhaps. Par for the course in life-long F’burg families.

The fact that Fong and husband flew cross country to appear on the reunion show, yet Garrent’s parents didn’t bother to make the one hour drive, speaks volumes. If I remember correctly, Taylor’s dad didn’t even want to appear on the show in the beginning.

Re the bolded, I understand exactly what you mean because my mother was that way. She looked down upon and was suspicious of anyone not from the US and/or not fully white. I'm so sorry for people like my mom. All I can say to console you is that I am not like that and that sort of racism in our family is ending with her generation.

Thanks for acknowledging this and working to change it. Curious: what do you think people like your mother are suspicious of exactly?

Well, anyone who's different or in some way is better than she is. Different is scary. She also looked down on the white woman who lived two doors away from us who would "prance up and down her driveway in a bikini pretending to get the newspaper all morning." But my mom was fat and the neighbor looked great in a bikini so it seemed like jealousy to teenage-me. When I looked through my mom's old photo albums from when she was in school, I thought it was kind of weird that she lived in NYC but all her friends were white. She also had an education that stopped after college and so didn't know about some things that were proven after that point in her life - like black people don't have a higher pain tolerance than white people, for example. Or that I couldn't get AIDS from being around a gay person if I had a paper cut. She didn't seek out people different from herself - as an adult all her friends were again, white. When I was growing up the only non-white people who came into our house were kids my brother and I made friends with.

DP-this is just proof that these white Americans who treat “others” badly are just ignorant and jealous.

Only white Americans who treat others badly?

Look in the mirror. You hold your own biases against people who are different.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t see Nick’s journal entry as a problem. He was stupid to have kept it or brought to set. That’s some thing that you don’t leave lying out. Pretty confident Hannah was going through his things the entire time. Also she was trashing his appearance from the beginning as well. But she just couldn’t handle that he might feel similarly. I didn’t like either one of them, but I thought that she was given way too much airtime.

Agree. Didn't Hannah do the same? She quit her job to go on the show. She wants to be famous too but just didn't write it down.

DP, but agree. Also, when you listen to any of the cast who says "I never expected to fall in love" it reads to me like they went on the show for clout, and coincidentally found someone. Not that they went on the show to find someone and coincidentally got famous.

I don’t understand the desire for social media followers. Fame (for no accomplishments)?

It is probably generational…but the value of being followed by strangers, who think they get to judge every aspect of your actions and appearance? No thank you.

It’s money. Once they have a lot of followers then they can start shilling products. Ramses already has been hawking some tooth whitening thing.

I recently got an ad from a previous one - Jess? The one with the 9 year old daughter or something. Idk what it was, I scrolled past it quickly, but that is definitely what they want to do. Enough followers = sponsorships

So they had no career plan or aspirations until a reality dating show stumbled into their lives?

You're welcome to watch the show and see what their jobs are/were.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t see Nick’s journal entry as a problem. He was stupid to have kept it or brought to set. That’s some thing that you don’t leave lying out. Pretty confident Hannah was going through his things the entire time. Also she was trashing his appearance from the beginning as well. But she just couldn’t handle that he might feel similarly. I didn’t like either one of them, but I thought that she was given way too much airtime.

Agree. Didn't Hannah do the same? She quit her job to go on the show. She wants to be famous too but just didn't write it down.

DP, but agree. Also, when you listen to any of the cast who says "I never expected to fall in love" it reads to me like they went on the show for clout, and coincidentally found someone. Not that they went on the show to find someone and coincidentally got famous.

I don’t understand the desire for social media followers. Fame (for no accomplishments)?

It is probably generational…but the value of being followed by strangers, who think they get to judge every aspect of your actions and appearance? No thank you.

It’s money. Once they have a lot of followers then they can start shilling products. Ramses already has been hawking some tooth whitening thing.

I recently got an ad from a previous one - Jess? The one with the 9 year old daughter or something. Idk what it was, I scrolled past it quickly, but that is definitely what they want to do. Enough followers = sponsorships

So they had no career plan or aspirations until a reality dating show stumbled into their lives?

It's not a stumble; a lot of them actively seek it out. On one season a girl quit her job at Deloitte to be an influencer and do a podcast. There is definitely some selection bias with these characters...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone up-thread said they thought Garrett wasn’t into Taylor anymore. Why?
I thought his body language was still good on reunion show.
Is it just bc they no longer have plans to move to San Diego??

That was me.

It’s a very slight change in his voice and also in his eyes; the sparkle is gone. My guess is that his family (mom in particular) made things very stressful for him, and he fell into a mild depressive state over the potential move to San Diego. That and/or he was on mood-stabilizing meds.

From the beginning, Garret’s mom gave off a vibe that is very familiar to me but hard to put into words. I’m mixed race, half-white like Taylor and often get the same type of closed-off reaction from certain people. It’s not necessarily racism, just other-ism, perhaps. Par for the course in life-long F’burg families.

The fact that Fong and husband flew cross country to appear on the reunion show, yet Garrent’s parents didn’t bother to make the one hour drive, speaks volumes. If I remember correctly, Taylor’s dad didn’t even want to appear on the show in the beginning.

Re the bolded, I understand exactly what you mean because my mother was that way. She looked down upon and was suspicious of anyone not from the US and/or not fully white. I'm so sorry for people like my mom. All I can say to console you is that I am not like that and that sort of racism in our family is ending with her generation.

Thanks for acknowledging this and working to change it. Curious: what do you think people like your mother are suspicious of exactly?

Well, anyone who's different or in some way is better than she is. Different is scary. She also looked down on the white woman who lived two doors away from us who would "prance up and down her driveway in a bikini pretending to get the newspaper all morning." But my mom was fat and the neighbor looked great in a bikini so it seemed like jealousy to teenage-me. When I looked through my mom's old photo albums from when she was in school, I thought it was kind of weird that she lived in NYC but all her friends were white. She also had an education that stopped after college and so didn't know about some things that were proven after that point in her life - like black people don't have a higher pain tolerance than white people, for example. Or that I couldn't get AIDS from being around a gay person if I had a paper cut. She didn't seek out people different from herself - as an adult all her friends were again, white. When I was growing up the only non-white people who came into our house were kids my brother and I made friends with.

DP-this is just proof that these white Americans who treat “others” badly are just ignorant and jealous.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t see Nick’s journal entry as a problem. He was stupid to have kept it or brought to set. That’s some thing that you don’t leave lying out. Pretty confident Hannah was going through his things the entire time. Also she was trashing his appearance from the beginning as well. But she just couldn’t handle that he might feel similarly. I didn’t like either one of them, but I thought that she was given way too much airtime.

Agree. Didn't Hannah do the same? She quit her job to go on the show. She wants to be famous too but just didn't write it down.

DP, but agree. Also, when you listen to any of the cast who says "I never expected to fall in love" it reads to me like they went on the show for clout, and coincidentally found someone. Not that they went on the show to find someone and coincidentally got famous.

I don’t understand the desire for social media followers. Fame (for no accomplishments)?

It is probably generational…but the value of being followed by strangers, who think they get to judge every aspect of your actions and appearance? No thank you.

It’s money. Once they have a lot of followers then they can start shilling products. Ramses already has been hawking some tooth whitening thing.

I recently got an ad from a previous one - Jess? The one with the 9 year old daughter or something. Idk what it was, I scrolled past it quickly, but that is definitely what they want to do. Enough followers = sponsorships

So they had no career plan or aspirations until a reality dating show stumbled into their lives?