Oh for the love

OP, if you can afford it now, then plan for the next -0 year anniversary. You can plan a renewal of your vows and have a fancy reception. Just make sure to make it a "no gifts" event and otherwise make it as fancy as you want and as expensive as you can afford. If you plan a big event and try to get gifts or even don't mention gifts, it will be seen as a gift grab (the expectation with no instructions is that gifts will be brought) and it may affect your friendships if people think of you as being greedy.

But you can have the big event you wanted as a vow renewal and anniversary celebration.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think I am the winner here - we got married at the courthouse and my generous in-laws, worth gazillions of dollars, took us to lunch at I Hop. Not even a DIY event from
FWIW, I'm also an immigrant who my piece-of-shit MIL thinks is inferior to them.

So OP, I get it. It's not about the wedding itself, it's about how you are being treated. I was never crazy about the wedding industry so I am not sad like you are But I am not in touch with my in laws and am secretly looking to the day when I can come and spit on their graves.

Gross, no wonder your in-laws keep their distance. They had your number from jump.

DP. You are the problem. The PP should not have to put up with xenophobic ILs.

I'm pretty sure my wedding cost around 12k, or a bit less. I look back on it and feel the whole thing is sort of cringey. What a waste of money on something so self-aggrandizing.

Anonymous wrote:Overall it came together beautifully as it by magic and it was very sweet that it was all of our effort to put it together.

OP this is such a good story. More special than the typical DC expensive wedding story. Focus on it. Then plan a big anniversary celebration.

Anonymous wrote:12k for a party sounds decent. Sorry you're going through this, OP. Is there something that you can do for yourself so you can take your mind off of this? Because while I understand you're sad about this, your grief seems out of proportion to the reality. What else is going on do you think?

+1

OP, spend that money on an epic honeymoon and be done with it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like this is an idea for a new TLC reality show.

Yes a new crop of bridezillas still mad they didn't get their perfect day. What could go wrong?! This is a show I would watch.

+1

Me too! Or a show about selfish/defiant/testy/envious bridesmaids, wedding guests, etc.

Yes, the guests who brought their kids to a "child free" wedding would be an epic show.

+1

Absolutely! They are at the top of the list (along with their excuses)!

Some people obviously don't like weddings, can't be happy for other people, and should just stay home.

OP, I would say you had the perfect day, you just don't realize it.

12k for a party sounds decent. Sorry you're going through this, OP. Is there something that you can do for yourself so you can take your mind off of this? Because while I understand you're sad about this, your grief seems out of proportion to the reality. What else is going on do you think?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like this is an idea for a new TLC reality show.

Yes a new crop of bridezillas still mad they didn't get their perfect day. What could go wrong?! This is a show I would watch.

+1

Me too! Or a show about selfish/defiant/testy/envious bridesmaids, wedding guests, etc.

Yes, the guests who brought their kids to a "child free" wedding would be an epic show.

Anonymous wrote:OP, my entire wedding cost 5k. And we had decent jobs and didn't consider ourselves poor; neither of us are immigrants. 12 freaking k for a party is a lot.

+1

OP, you need to learn gratitude. Sounds like whatever wedding you have, it will never be good enough. That, and you aren't surrounded by positive people, so WTH would you want them "celebrating" with you, when they will only try to make your day miserable? Be glad you had a peaceful day with just the two of you!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like this is an idea for a new TLC reality show.

Yes a new crop of bridezillas still mad they didn't get their perfect day. What could go wrong?! This is a show I would watch.

+1

Me too! Or a show about selfish/defiant/testy/envious bridesmaids, wedding guests, etc.

OP, my entire wedding cost 5k. And we had decent jobs and didn't consider ourselves poor; neither of us are immigrants. 12 freaking k for a party is a lot.

Anonymous wrote:I feel like this is an idea for a new TLC reality show.

Yes a new crop of bridezillas still mad they didn't get their perfect day. What could go wrong?! This is a show I would watch.

I feel like this is an idea for a new TLC reality show.

Really? I had my dream wedding and unfortunately I married a psychopath. My divorce cost me over a hundred grand.

Be lucky that you found true love, for that is priceless.