You may be in a very committed relationship that you plan to stay in for the rest of yourself, but the relationship you’re committed to is one where you know you will not get married and will never merge finances, so it’s always going to be a slightly more arms-length relationship. There is nothing wrong with that, but it is a different relationship from one where you have joint finances and plan for major financial obligations together.

He has been very honest with you about what he wants, and what he wants does not include the obligations of marriage. If he were to offer to help with your daughter’s college, great. But unless he offers, you should have no expectation that he will contribute.

Damn, OP is just asking a question. She's not "greedy" and "horrible." Get a grip.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP here. Forgot to add, the title of this thread is incorrect. The boyfriend is not a step parent.

He kind of is, considering the daughter lives in his house with him.

Will BF discipline DD? Will he attend parent teacher conferences? Will he tell DD that he doesn’t like a boy that she brings home and forbid her to see him? I can’t see any child responding well to a BF overstepping. If he will be doing all of these things, then I stand corrected.

Anonymous wrote:OP, your partner is not involved in money for college. You shouldn't discuss this. He shouldn't be asked, in any way, shape or form. You should shut down any of this thinking, by you, that he would help in any way.

Too bad there's a disparity. Too bad. He has his family. You have yours.

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