Anonymous wrote:For everyone saying ages younger than 16...why? Genuinely asking.

We got one in 6th grade when my kid walked home by himself and had an hour or so until we got home. We needed to communicate. The ability for him to make his our plans was a huge bonus I was not expecting. Why 16 for you? Different families, different needs.

My kid 8yo has my old android phone but it only uses WiFi. It doesn’t have a phone number, she can use kids messenger to call me from the house. It’s basically the same as a tablet but it’s a phone. 🤷‍♀️ For an actual phone with a phone number I’m thinking 9th grade.

Our family rule is 8th grade- and despite being the only ones who did this of our friends groups- I stand by it as one of my best parenting decisions.
Once kids get phone- from my experience life is over as you know it. Phones will be the defining negative of this generation. And I work at google.
But the impact and effect these have on kids and families- OMG- it’s insane. Just wait.
Stand firm- make them wait until 8th grade. There are a hundred reasons to justify getting them- hear it from parent sans kids- but there is one big one for not- you lose your kids in many ways once they have that device.

They will define their existence by every click, like and snap- and they are lost without them. Family conversations- forget it- enjoying a vacation in the moment- nope- liking an outfit - hairstyle or activity without other ok’ing it- never.
They suck- and until they have one, you have a chance at having your child back.

8th grade or later. Addiction. Social Media. I don't see any pros to having a smart phone for a teen.

We got DS (6th) an apple watch - which has tons of parental controls, but phone/texts. No social media. No games really. It's ideal.

Anonymous wrote:My kids are 10 and 12 and they both don’t have phones. They do have iPads where they can FaceTime and text their friends while playing games. I am considering getting a family phone to take to sports so they have a way to contact us.

At what age did you get or plan to get your child a phone?

When they NEED it.

My son is thirteen and had a modified smart phone since he started middle school and would be walking home alone. He knows the unlock code and not the password, and I disabled the data portion when not at home (I will let it run on wifi). He can’t download any apps, and he has no social media. However, the phone and operating system is a piece of crap and breaking. Next year, I will,probably give him my old iPhone (still no password) because at this point I just want to manage it with the rest of the Apple infrastructure we have in our house.

Also, a lot of kids with "no social media" actually have it. They set up accounts on their friends phones and check them at school/activities. Imagine how that could go wrong, with their friends having control of their social media.

I know of at least 3 girls in my dc 8th grade who's parents say no social media and they are on tiktok and instagram.

Anonymous wrote:Our 6th grader didn't get one this year. With distance learning it was easier to hold off.

+1

We will give our daughter one at 13. She’s in no way ready for one now.

Kids text each other to set up hangouts. No kid wants to have to call the mom's cell to set it up.
Nowadays people don't have landlines, either. So to set up something, you have to have your mom call the other mom. In 7/8 grade this isn't good.

You can give them a locked down cell with texting ability. Otherwise you are def. hurting them. Sorry, but true.

And I say this as a kid that was raised super strict on phone usage- landline usage. TV heavily controlled. Guess what happened when I went to college or to a friends house. Totally berserk. my 2 cents

I got DD one at age 10 so she could have a way to text me after I dropped her off at her sports area and wasn’t sure when she wanted me to pick her up. It has been good I think. We don’t let her use the iPad for her personal stuff because I use it for safari and other apps we don’t want her to have access to.

DD is now 12 and is allowed to use it for 1.5 hours a day. They use it for music, kindle, texting, FaceTiming, Apple Pay, YouTube music, and audible. DH and I read her texts on a regular basis (and DD knows this). I know experts say I should wait until 8 but I genuinely have a hard time seeing what could be wrong with our approach.

Can they text on flip
Phones?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Flip phone when they get their drivers license. Not kidding.

I agree! No kidding.

Also doing this. Not kidding. So is DD’s best friend. It helps a lot of they have one friend with same parental rules.

For everyone saying ages younger than 16...why? Genuinely asking.

8th grade

Anonymous wrote:My child got a phone at 10, which I think is when his friends got phones too.

You don't have to give a kid a phone because his friends have phones.