^ well, ok. How about the @ssholes that cheat when getting sex at home? Plenty of those.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hope the "sexless" guy/guys are reading this thread.

If the man is being a jerk in the relationship sex is the last thing a woman wants.

This. I once read a quote about a man not realizing that what he says is also heard by our vaginas.

Being a jerk is in the eye of the beholder. And who can know which came first, the jerk husband or the sexless wife?
Men in sexless marriages (obviously!) know that sex is the last thing she wants. And yet, there she remains .... staying .... sexlessly... married.
Which means she does not want a divorce!

And here presents a common gender based "cold war" dilemma that women can live perpetually without sex while men can last only a few weeks.
So the only way this man can avoid divorce is to find a girlfriend. The hateful wife gets what she wants (staying sexlessly married) only by his going elsewhere for sex.

I hope the sexless wives who hate their husbands are reading this thread. Divorce your jerk husband! Or accept DADT to save your marriage.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I know I didn't write this, because my son is not sporty.

But I have the exact same problem - DS disappoints my husband, and every time my husband has a bad day, he takes it out on our son.

My son has ADHD and Asperger's and can be very frustrating to deal with.... but screaming at him every week, and not showing him any affection at all, is abusive and very damaging.

I can't divorce. I need to be there to defend him.

Ugh. I understand entirely. I’m sandwiched between two aspies, the angry 40 yo H and the acting out 8 yo DC. I’m about to turn down a promotion I can’t take any more hours or higher demands.

Boy does this resonate. So sorry.

Anonymous wrote:Same. Can't even find a couples counselor - they're all booked up.

Somehow this makes me feel better. If we can just hang on until post-Covid will everyone on this thread be doing better?

Anonymous wrote:I really used to hate my husband until he died.

Lucky you. I prayed for death but it didn't work so I divorced him.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every day this forum reminds me why I stay away from men.
Ladies, I hope it gets better for each of you soon.

+1

Lesbian here. My wife and I have our issues but damn. Could not have made it with a dude even if I had wanted to.

Just as it’s ridiculous to generalize about all women, it’s ridiculous to generalize about all men.

- A woman who is happy in her marriage to a man

I'm not really generalizing.

https://www.them.us/story/gay-marriage-is-better

https://www.apa.org/monitor/2013/04/same-sex

https://www.advocate.com/people/2020/2/13/study-gay-people-have-happier-marriages-straight-people

Anecdotally speaking, we have tons of married friends - gay and straight. From those observations alone, I stand by what I said. Of course not every man is the same, and that's not what I said.

Not the first time straight ladies have gotten butt hurt over this observation on DCUM.

Lol, I mean, I could see it being easier to be married to a woman... but then you don’t get to have regular sex with a man! So that’s out.

Anonymous wrote:UGH. Present, not "president," above, sorry.

Don’t be sorry, autocorrect rocks!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We just moved into a bigger house that I really didn’t want to, because I felt like I was trapping myself. I am mostly happier because I have more space to myself, but it’s also an albatross. Tomorrow he’ll act like everything’s back to normal. He can never apologize or grow from his mistakes.

Same here. DH never apologizes and will not address his issues. I married Mr. Perfect. It's never him, it's me. I'm the source of all problems. If I dare complain about something or ask him to address something, he lashes out and gets snide because how dare I.

Same here! I married mr perfect too and every day that goes by I hate him more and more. He will turn everything around to my fault. I can NEVER complain about anything too because he gives me the same how dare I. The dog he brought home shit in the kitchen and when I brought it to his attention he said it was the cats fault. Because the cat opened the door to our bedroom during the night and let the dog out.

This is a prime example of how so many marriages are trash - the people in them are stupid. What does it matter if the dog HE brought home shit on the floor, or the cat (presumably "yours") facilitated it? Just imagining having such stupid thoughts is lowering my IQ as I read your post

My point was that I can never bring the dogs(husbands) bad behavior his attention without him turning it back to being my fault. How bout, “oh shoot honey Im sorry I should’ve given the dog more than 32 seconds to do her business last night”..

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We just moved into a bigger house that I really didn’t want to, because I felt like I was trapping myself. I am mostly happier because I have more space to myself, but it’s also an albatross. Tomorrow he’ll act like everything’s back to normal. He can never apologize or grow from his mistakes.

Same here. DH never apologizes and will not address his issues. I married Mr. Perfect. It's never him, it's me. I'm the source of all problems. If I dare complain about something or ask him to address something, he lashes out and gets snide because how dare I.

Same here! I married mr perfect too and every day that goes by I hate him more and more. He will turn everything around to my fault. I can NEVER complain about anything too because he gives me the same how dare I. The dog he brought home shit in the kitchen and when I brought it to his attention he said it was the cats fault. Because the cat opened the door to our bedroom during the night and let the dog out.

I had a cat once that was a bad influence on my dog. I wasn't married so I had to own it.

Anonymous wrote:OP, you must stick up for your son. If confronting your husband has proven unsuccessful, I would suggest writing a somewhat brief email where you acknowledge how much he cares and try and compliment him on something relating to parenting but then clearly and directly tell him that his behavior relating to sports is hurting your son. Don't say, "I think" or "I believe"....say "it is" and tell him that he must stop. I've done this. And honestly my husband typically responds well. Then again, I married a pretty nice guy who is quick to anger.

Do not do this -he will use the email in divorce court -this is a terrible idea -instead you should talk to him and point out the things he could work harder on to have a better relationship with his child

I don't want to alarm you divorced/single women, but these are the guys that are being dumped back into the pool of single eligible men. Dating from a cesspool of rejects and losers.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That so many of you decided to marry men you clearly have come to hate and have no regard for says much about you and your poor decisions in life. That some of you stay married to these men makes me question your level of intelligence. Do you have self-respect or dignity? It comes off as pathetic.
If I felt this way about dh I would definitely divorce.

You can never predict the future behavior of any human being! People change, personalities change, brains change. Don’t judge.

So again, why stay? That someone does stay is an easy tell of what little reserve of self-worth they have.

I really used to hate my husband until he died.

Anonymous wrote:That so many of you decided to marry men you clearly have come to hate and have no regard for says much about you and your poor decisions in life. That some of you stay married to these men makes me question your level of intelligence. Do you have self-respect or dignity? It comes off as pathetic.
If I felt this way about dh I would definitely divorce.

Agree 100%

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We just moved into a bigger house that I really didn’t want to, because I felt like I was trapping myself. I am mostly happier because I have more space to myself, but it’s also an albatross. Tomorrow he’ll act like everything’s back to normal. He can never apologize or grow from his mistakes.

Same here. DH never apologizes and will not address his issues. I married Mr. Perfect. It's never him, it's me. I'm the source of all problems. If I dare complain about something or ask him to address something, he lashes out and gets snide because how dare I.

Same here! I married mr perfect too and every day that goes by I hate him more and more. He will turn everything around to my fault. I can NEVER complain about anything too because he gives me the same how dare I. The dog he brought home shit in the kitchen and when I brought it to his attention he said it was the cats fault. Because the cat opened the door to our bedroom during the night and let the dog out.

I had a cat once that was a bad influence on my dog. I wasn't married so I had to own it.