This happened with DH's family except it was his sister's inlaws who were called- and they are incredibly cheap (have money/don't spend it easily). So when they got the call that the grandson (SIL's son) was in a Mexican jail and needed tens of thousands- SIL's inlaws then called the OTHER inlaws (SIL and my DH's parents) to ask them to pay!

"Grandson needs help and we are sure you can pay! Thanx!" My inlaws are smart/knew it was BS (had just seen him the night before- he's very bookish and not the type to randomly run to Mexico, do drugs, drink or get arrested) so they just kept repeating to the inlaws that he was fine and that they should call him if they wanted to hear his voice- and to ignore the calls. They then said they didn't want to call as it was long distance- haaaaa! "Hey, can you pay this lawyer $50G- because we are too cheap to spend $1 on a phone call checking this out with our grandson?"... we are all still laughing about this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cant the $50K be retrieved somehow? Paper trail?

Yeah - this. Transferring $50k is not easy.

I just googled "elderly scammed out of money help" and tons of resources popped up. Wire transfers take a few days to go through and no bank is going to want to be in the middle of a criminal case. Hopefully authorities were called right away. It should definitely be reported to the FBI.

No. Wires are same day transfers

Wire Transfers are immediately withdrawn, not credited, especially if international.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cant the $50K be retrieved somehow? Paper trail?

Yeah - this. Transferring $50k is not easy.

I just googled "elderly scammed out of money help" and tons of resources popped up. Wire transfers take a few days to go through and no bank is going to want to be in the middle of a criminal case. Hopefully authorities were called right away. It should definitely be reported to the FBI.

No. Wires are same day transfers

I got a call like that and it was so real to me that I was shaking for days.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is so much information on line (Spokeo, White Pages, Facebook, obituaries) with names, ages, relatives, addresses, etc., that it wouldn’t be hard for a scammer to figure out who the older and young adult relatives are and use that to their advantage in conning someone.

But to know OPs grandmother was in the hospital? If a true story must be someone who knows this family.

This is OP. I am sorry but that was a typo. In the story my friend’s mom was in the hospital, that is why I was visiting her last minute.

Full neurological work up ASAP. Your mom definitely has early onset dementia. Probably had issues already for years. So sorry this happened.

Anonymous wrote:I know a family where the grandfather was called about bail for his grandson. He also “talked” to his grandson who was crying but he absolutely believed it was him. He did end up calling another family member after dropping off a package with payment at fedex and they were able to halt delivery. He was elderly but normal cognitively apparently.

This happened to my parents, as well. The exact same thing! Except my parents were told to pay with Target gift cards
Somehow. I don’t recall the exact sequence of requests, but they spoke with someone posing as my nephew, their grandson, who was supposedly in jail for getting into a car accident with a diplomat. My mother swore it was my nephew she was talking to. Thankfully she called me at the very last minute before going forward with getting the money. What a horrible thing to do to elderly people, to prey on their emotions like that.

OP, your poor mom. I hope your family can lay off making her feel stupid right now. Plenty of time to learn a lesson from this. But help her feel better - she’s probably so embarrassed and horrified but it clearly came from a place of love and support for you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is so much information on line (Spokeo, White Pages, Facebook, obituaries) with names, ages, relatives, addresses, etc., that it wouldn’t be hard for a scammer to figure out who the older and young adult relatives are and use that to their advantage in conning someone.

But to know OPs grandmother was in the hospital? If a true story must be someone who knows this family.

The hospital ruse is a common one, as is the car accident and being jailed in a foreign country.

I’m the OP of this thread (my 81-year-old mom was scammed) & am linking it here in case it’s of any help:
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/0/915381.page#18213196

^neighborhood *list serv

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am so sorry this happened to your mom OP and to you. I do not have any advice but have to say that your mom's situation is a testament of her love for you. I think that when a mother hears of a hardship happening to their child they are instantly not in the right mindset to think clearly. They just want to help in any way possible. This is how your mom was tricked: the scammers played upon her basic hard-wired need to care for and protect you.

I hope you are right. I mean, I know certainly you are right she was overcome with a need to help me, but I am still feeling worried that she might be deteriorating mentally and I feel very helpless.

You’d be surprised, OP - so many people fall for these scams. It can happen to anyone, even those who are mentally sound. My MIL has fallen for more than one (though thankfully didn’t lose that much money) and she’s actually quite sharp. On my neighborhood lost service people are constantly warning one another about these scams; your mom obviously didn’t know about them and reacted emotionally, thinking you were in trouble.

Your mom is deeply embarrassed and ashamed, so of course she doesn’t want to talk or think about it. I really feel for her.

Op-was your grandmother in the hospital in Boston? Or she just lives in Boston and the scammers said she’d been in an accident and you were there? Just wondering how involved the scam was.

On a side note for skeptics, I had several family members in a horrible car accident in another state. It was incredibly confusing figuring out what was going o with police and multiple hospitals/doctors calling. Sadly it was all true but I can say that hearing news like that zero percent of me was discerning or evaluating the source. I don’t think I could have been tricked into sending a bunch of google play gift cards to anyone but nor did I have a shred of doubt and I did not call my loved ones to confirm because I had been told they were in surgery, etc. I’m sure op’s mom was in a similar mode.

Anonymous wrote:There is so much information on line (Spokeo, White Pages, Facebook, obituaries) with names, ages, relatives, addresses, etc., that it wouldn’t be hard for a scammer to figure out who the older and young adult relatives are and use that to their advantage in conning someone.

But to know OPs grandmother was in the hospital? If a true story must be someone who knows this family.

There is so much information on line (Spokeo, White Pages, Facebook, obituaries) with names, ages, relatives, addresses, etc., that it wouldn’t be hard for a scammer to figure out who the older and young adult relatives are and use that to their advantage in conning someone.