I’m a field grade military officer, and the majority of my colleagues have working spouses. My spouse works, and our HHI is $400K. I’m not sure why you think most have a SAHP

What I’ve seen for those with a SAHP, they purchase real estate and make money on the sales. I purchased a home in the DC area, owned it for 10 years, then sold it. We made $305K on the sale.

For retirement, the pension is cola adjusted. The pension keeps rising as costs rise. And most have TSP and ROTH IRAs. That is plenty to live off.

For college expenses, you’re over saving in my opinion. I transferred my GI BILL to my kids. One using part of it in college now. If you use one month of GI Bill, you get instate tuition and remains for the rest of the time attending that school. Even if you stop using the GI Bill. And the STEAM kicker gives you another year of GI Bill is your child is studying math, science, engineering.

Childcare is very affordable. I paid $1,100/month for 2 kids in full time daycare. My neighbors paid $4,000.

They aren’t saving as much as you are, but also:

1. They are paying very little in taxes if they only have one income and multiple kids.

2. They might be making money on the houses they buy and sell a few years later.

Retired 50 y/o military officer here after 25 years of service. The key to financial independence is to live below your means as much as possible, don't try to keep up with the Jones, invest early and often, and have multiple income streams and/or side hustles.


A few things to point out:

Living below your means has to be a state of mind in everything you do but it does not have to mean sacrificing the good things in life either. Just be smart about it. Wants vs Needs. Do you need that fancy new car or do you want that fancy new car? Can you fly somewhere Military Space-A or are you the type that has to fly First Class? Look at all your bills and see where you can save. Pay off your credit cards every month and take advantage of credit card rewards. Mow your own lawn.

Take advantage of being a military retiree or veteran as much as possible when it comes to discounts. So many businesses give military discounts if you ask. Shop at the commissary and exchange. Many exchanges will match online or other major retailer prices if you ask and then you don't pay the sales tax. Another example to show how much you can save being military or retiree....if you are a skier (I am), Vail Resorts offers the Military Epic Pass. This is one of the best deals in all of skiing if you are active or a retiree. For the 23/24 ski season, and Epic Pass is $159 and that covers all Vail Resorts all season. Just consider a regular day lift ticket at Breck, Park City, Vail, Whistler, etc alone is over $200.

Next, learn about money, finance, investing, and taxes. There is so much info on the internet to teach yourself. You don't need to be an accountant or a Wall Street insider. I started investing as soon as I started making money as a teenager. Stock, bonds, real estate, etc --- start small and build. That's decades of growth and compounding. Take advantage of the Roth IRA and if you make too much money the Backdoor Roth IRA. Study investments and companies and don't be a spectator to American capitalism. If you don't want to research individual companies, buy low cost S&P500 index funds. Never chase the latest meme stock or crypto. Read about and talk to wealthy people. Learn how Ted Weschler turned his $70K IRA into a $264M tax free Roth IRA.

Learn about taxes to save on taxes. The best way to do this is to do your own taxes and read up on tax saving strategies that are only a quick google search away.

Max out 401Ks/TSP so you get the employer match (free money). No brainer here. Consider a Roth 401K or the Roth TSP if you can afford paying the taxes now. As far as Roth over regular 401K or TSP, I personally think the govt will need to raise taxes a lot in the future to cover all the entitlement programs, spending, and debt so I'm assuming tax rates will be a lot higher when I retire. I also fundamentally disagree with the assumption you'll be in a lower tax bracket when you retire if you played your cards right so Roth is the way to go with my assumptions.

9/11 GI Bill and Yellow Ribbon Program - Huge for saving hundreds of thousands of dollars for college and/or graduate programs for yourself or if you are eligible and made the proper designations for your kids. Just make sure you give each kid at least one month before you retire or leave the service. I estimate at current rates, this will save me close to $280-300K in college expenses for my daughter.

Anonymous wrote:Wow, the responses in this thread are pretty insipid.

OP, I grew up the child of an O-6 and a DODDS teacher. My father served 29 years in the USAF, mostly internationally, then worked another 10 as a contractor.

Combined with my mother’s teaching pension, they did well. The contractor job at the end came with a high salary, housing allowance, golf membership, and company bmw.

On that salary, we routinely vacationed, had two BMWs, and they saved for college, paying full freight for me at Stanford, and another sibling at a state school. They also bought me a new 3 series as a graduation present.

So, it can be done, especially overseas. They did not buy a house until retirement, though, which also meant no remodeling costs along the way. They now have 3 pensions plus a couple mil in savings + home equity.

All this, yet you don't know the meaning of the word insipid.

Married to E-9 reservist with 21 years in - credit card debt is rampant in the military especially for enlisted and tons of stupid financial decisions like payroll loans, new cars all the time, etc.

Didn't have time to read all the responses, sorry, but this is my H's pet peeve with his sailors.

Woah- $1500 a month for college?!?!?! I mean do you have high schoolers and are trying to catch up?

Anonymous wrote:Wow, the responses in this thread are pretty insipid.

OP, I grew up the child of an O-6 and a DODDS teacher. My father served 29 years in the USAF, mostly internationally, then worked another 10 as a contractor.

Combined with my mother’s teaching pension, they did well. The contractor job at the end came with a high salary, housing allowance, golf membership, and company bmw.

On that salary, we routinely vacationed, had two BMWs, and they saved for college, paying full freight for me at Stanford, and another sibling at a state school. They also bought me a new 3 series as a graduation present.

So, it can be done, especially overseas. They did not buy a house until retirement, though, which also meant no remodeling costs along the way. They now have 3 pensions plus a couple mil in savings + home equity.

This can be typical with officers, not enlisted. Two different worlds.

Wow, the responses in this thread are pretty insipid.

OP, I grew up the child of an O-6 and a DODDS teacher. My father served 29 years in the USAF, mostly internationally, then worked another 10 as a contractor.

Combined with my mother’s teaching pension, they did well. The contractor job at the end came with a high salary, housing allowance, golf membership, and company bmw.

On that salary, we routinely vacationed, had two BMWs, and they saved for college, paying full freight for me at Stanford, and another sibling at a state school. They also bought me a new 3 series as a graduation present.

So, it can be done, especially overseas. They did not buy a house until retirement, though, which also meant no remodeling costs along the way. They now have 3 pensions plus a couple mil in savings + home equity.

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Anonymous wrote:Yes! We make about 350K per year and max out everything. That's sound financial planning. His 5K pension is only about half we'll need in retirement.

So, you are comparing yourself to making $350k to other families making $60-100K... and you need $10K a month in retirement. You sound very high maintenance.

Who makes 60-100K? Most of the military families we know in the DC area are making 200K+

Not sure what you mean by high maintenance. We are 20+ years from retirement so 10K won't be worth what it is today.

Let me guess you only know officers. You don’t need $10k a month to retire. Most live on far less.

The OP is an officer family...so we aren't talking about enlisted.

If you live in an expensive locale then you need more than 5K a month. Neither of us come from inexpensive areas of the country so even if we left DC and went "home" 5K wouldn't cut it.

She started the discussion about military families. Not high ranking officer families. Once your kids are out of the house, you own a house, $5K is plenty.

Who owns a home outright by the time they retire? When someone moves every 2 years they might hang on to one property in Fort Hood Texas but that's not exactly buying you much anywhere else.

The OP is an officer's wife - she says so. They will be getting 5K+ in retirement or nothing at all (20 years or bust).

I have a financial planner because we are wealthier than most. So appreciate your thoughts, but I'll trust the professionals.

My spouse is retired. Some of us have been there done that. Don’t be so arrogant. You are probably not wealthier but keep telling yourself that. This is why many look down on officers wives for this behavior. They wear their husbands rank and think it is their own.

I'm not the OP. We make nearly 400K per year and have a net worth over $1 million...I'm not a DCUM poster that thinks that's middle class.

Are you retired military? Enlisted or officer? Humm.. where is the rest of your net worth on that income? Its not middle class but you should have a far higher rent worth.

Lol. I love how the only option that you don't choose is a military spouse being a bread winner. I far out earn my spouse. Our networth is in excess of 1 million we've been at the earning level for a few years and only married a few years. We're relatively young (35) so 7 years from retirement.

You were entirely missing the point. And, so, you are an officer's spouse as most enlisted retire at 38, not 42....its much easier to save on two large incomes and being an officer vs. enlisted. If you were an enlisted family, I'd be impressed. At an officer salary plus a second large income, not that impressive.

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Anonymous wrote:Yes! We make about 350K per year and max out everything. That's sound financial planning. His 5K pension is only about half we'll need in retirement.

So, you are comparing yourself to making $350k to other families making $60-100K... and you need $10K a month in retirement. You sound very high maintenance.

Who makes 60-100K? Most of the military families we know in the DC area are making 200K+

Not sure what you mean by high maintenance. We are 20+ years from retirement so 10K won't be worth what it is today.

Let me guess you only know officers. You don’t need $10k a month to retire. Most live on far less.

The OP is an officer family...so we aren't talking about enlisted.

If you live in an expensive locale then you need more than 5K a month. Neither of us come from inexpensive areas of the country so even if we left DC and went "home" 5K wouldn't cut it.

She started the discussion about military families. Not high ranking officer families. Once your kids are out of the house, you own a house, $5K is plenty.

Who owns a home outright by the time they retire? When someone moves every 2 years they might hang on to one property in Fort Hood Texas but that's not exactly buying you much anywhere else.

The OP is an officer's wife - she says so. They will be getting 5K+ in retirement or nothing at all (20 years or bust).

I have a financial planner because we are wealthier than most. So appreciate your thoughts, but I'll trust the professionals.

My spouse is retired. Some of us have been there done that. Don’t be so arrogant. You are probably not wealthier but keep telling yourself that. This is why many look down on officers wives for this behavior. They wear their husbands rank and think it is their own.

I'm not the OP. We make nearly 400K per year and have a net worth over $1 million...I'm not a DCUM poster that thinks that's middle class.

Are you retired military? Enlisted or officer? Humm.. where is the rest of your net worth on that income? Its not middle class but you should have a far higher rent worth.

Lol. I love how the only option that you don't choose is a military spouse being a bread winner. I far out earn my spouse. Our networth is in excess of 1 million we've been at the earning level for a few years and only married a few years. We're relatively young (35) so 7 years from retirement.

Anonymous wrote:Op, you guys probably have a HHI of ~$200k. This is not a military question but a UMC question.

I have a friend who is a SAHM with a military spouse. They seem like they manage their money well. Whenever they move, they buy and rent out. They have 3-4 homes now. Most of their travel is to visit family and they take one vacation per year. They follow a budget and she spends wisely. They go way further with their ~100k than some other friends I have who have HHI of $200-300k who have much more expensive lifestyles, require childcare, eat out all the time, luxury cars, etc.

They are buying and renting out in crappy areas with little appreciation on that salary.

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Anonymous wrote:This is such a classic officer wife mentality. The post oozes arrogance and is a shameless (and odd) brag.

“Id love to hear about your savings if you are a military family” 😂 so fake I cannot even deal.

To them enlisted don't exist...

+100

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Anonymous wrote:Yes! We make about 350K per year and max out everything. That's sound financial planning. His 5K pension is only about half we'll need in retirement.

So, you are comparing yourself to making $350k to other families making $60-100K... and you need $10K a month in retirement. You sound very high maintenance.

Who makes 60-100K? Most of the military families we know in the DC area are making 200K+

Not sure what you mean by high maintenance. We are 20+ years from retirement so 10K won't be worth what it is today.

Let me guess you only know officers. You don’t need $10k a month to retire. Most live on far less.

The OP is an officer family...so we aren't talking about enlisted.

If you live in an expensive locale then you need more than 5K a month. Neither of us come from inexpensive areas of the country so even if we left DC and went "home" 5K wouldn't cut it.

She started the discussion about military families. Not high ranking officer families. Once your kids are out of the house, you own a house, $5K is plenty.

Who owns a home outright by the time they retire? When someone moves every 2 years they might hang on to one property in Fort Hood Texas but that's not exactly buying you much anywhere else.

The OP is an officer's wife - she says so. They will be getting 5K+ in retirement or nothing at all (20 years or bust).

I have a financial planner because we are wealthier than most. So appreciate your thoughts, but I'll trust the professionals.

My spouse is retired. Some of us have been there done that. Don’t be so arrogant. You are probably not wealthier but keep telling yourself that. This is why many look down on officers wives for this behavior. They wear their husbands rank and think it is their own.

I'm not the OP. We make nearly 400K per year and have a net worth over $1 million...I'm not a DCUM poster that thinks that's middle class.

Are you retired military? Enlisted or officer? Humm.. where is the rest of your net worth on that income? Its not middle class but you should have a far higher rent worth.

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Anonymous wrote:Yes! We make about 350K per year and max out everything. That's sound financial planning. His 5K pension is only about half we'll need in retirement.

So, you are comparing yourself to making $350k to other families making $60-100K... and you need $10K a month in retirement. You sound very high maintenance.

Who makes 60-100K? Most of the military families we know in the DC area are making 200K+

Not sure what you mean by high maintenance. We are 20+ years from retirement so 10K won't be worth what it is today.

Let me guess you only know officers. You don’t need $10k a month to retire. Most live on far less.

The OP is an officer family...so we aren't talking about enlisted.

If you live in an expensive locale then you need more than 5K a month. Neither of us come from inexpensive areas of the country so even if we left DC and went "home" 5K wouldn't cut it.

She started the discussion about military families. Not high ranking officer families. Once your kids are out of the house, you own a house, $5K is plenty.

Who owns a home outright by the time they retire? When someone moves every 2 years they might hang on to one property in Fort Hood Texas but that's not exactly buying you much anywhere else.

The OP is an officer's wife - she says so. They will be getting 5K+ in retirement or nothing at all (20 years or bust).

I have a financial planner because we are wealthier than most. So appreciate your thoughts, but I'll trust the professionals.

My spouse is retired. Some of us have been there done that. Don’t be so arrogant. You are probably not wealthier but keep telling yourself that. This is why many look down on officers wives for this behavior. They wear their husbands rank and think it is their own.

I'm not the OP. We make nearly 400K per year and have a net worth over $1 million...I'm not a DCUM poster that thinks that's middle class.

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Yes! We make about 350K per year and max out everything. That's sound financial planning. His 5K pension is only about half we'll need in retirement.

So, you are comparing yourself to making $350k to other families making $60-100K... and you need $10K a month in retirement. You sound very high maintenance.

Who makes 60-100K? Most of the military families we know in the DC area are making 200K+

Not sure what you mean by high maintenance. We are 20+ years from retirement so 10K won't be worth what it is today.

Let me guess you only know officers. You don’t need $10k a month to retire. Most live on far less.

The OP is an officer family...so we aren't talking about enlisted.

If you live in an expensive locale then you need more than 5K a month. Neither of us come from inexpensive areas of the country so even if we left DC and went "home" 5K wouldn't cut it.

She started the discussion about military families. Not high ranking officer families. Once your kids are out of the house, you own a house, $5K is plenty.

Who owns a home outright by the time they retire? When someone moves every 2 years they might hang on to one property in Fort Hood Texas but that's not exactly buying you much anywhere else.

The OP is an officer's wife - she says so. They will be getting 5K+ in retirement or nothing at all (20 years or bust).

I have a financial planner because we are wealthier than most. So appreciate your thoughts, but I'll trust the professionals.

My spouse is retired. Some of us have been there done that. Don’t be so arrogant. You are probably not wealthier but keep telling yourself that. This is why many look down on officers wives for this behavior. They wear their husbands rank and think it is their own.