Newborn stage is terrible ; I would leave the house everyday for 1-2 hours once DH got home even just to roam around target, it does get better though around 12 weeks for me.

Their little tummies are like the size of a golf ball so they need to eat frequently.
Once they grow a bit, they won't need to feast quite so frequently.
They also become more efficient drinkers around the 9 week mark.

This is a terrible period but you HAVE to get out of holding for naps. So many people do this and it’s so draining and horrible.

Stop feeding before naps. Feed when the baby wakes up. Then after an appropriate wake window, use a swaddle (even if the baby “hates” it) and 5Ss to put to sleep. See Taking Cara Babies.

When you get nap time back, that will really help.

I remember 2-3 weeks being a low point for me because of the reasons that you mention. Things that helped me— a schedule that included neighborhood walks, walking to the grocery store (even if just for one small item), etc. + getting out in the world as much as possible + telling my DH that he would 100% be home by exactly 5 every day + watching good television

That’s just how it is. Get some good Netflix shows to binge or a good book. I have a newborn and older kids too. The baby stage is just about as good as it gets.

I was OP of this thread a year ago. I clung to the responses on here like a life raft and it really helped me to get through the first couple of weeks knowing things WOULD get better. When I was deep in it, it truly seemed impossible that life would ever be good or remotely pleasurable again. It was hellish till about week 8 or so and then got slowly better around week 12. I wanted to come back and thank everyone who responded- I read this thread so many times during long breastfeeding sessions and sleepless nights but never got round to replying then bc I was bone tired.

Newborn stage sucks!!!! I did not enjoy it at all. No, I didn’t have PPD.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It gets better but it gets better very gradually. I’m so sorry. You will get through this but keep your expectations low.

My kids are 4 and 6 and while I love them very much, every day is a slog.

Mine are similar in age, and I get what you're saying, but it's nothing like it was with a newborn. It was so incredibly rough when mine were babies. Now, they can amuse themselves for a while, they actually sleep through the night, then can even get food for themselves to an extent, etc. They say funny things. They are independent to the extent that they can go to the bathroom on their own, find a toy they want to play with, etc.

OP, I just want you to know that even when the baby days are hard, it really, really does get to be so much more fun when they are older and way more interesting.

I hear you soooooo much! My kids were exactly the same. It was really rough, but you will get through it. Hang in there! It gets better slowly until you realize it isn't nearly so bad anymore. The baby will also get so much more interesting as they get older and will be awake more and actually doing things besides eating and pooping. Hugs.

You have gotten lots of great answers here - it definitely gets better when they start smiling around 6 weeks bc it makes all the hard work worth it. I'd say it gets a lot easier after 3 months. My son is 5.5 months now and even though the 4 month regression was absolutely awful, it was nothing compared to weeks 3-5 for me. I had a friend tell me "the whole first year is one giant regression" so just keep that in mind - they develop so quickly and there will always be something with each stage, just when you figure them out.

Have you had her latch evaluated by an LC? Mine had a tongue and lip tie and fell asleep on the boob constantly (yeah yeah i know, everyone's baby does these days) and we got them revised around 6 weeks and it made a world of difference in not just feeding but in everything. Tongue ties especially (depending on type) can cause lots of tension in baby's neck, jaw, etc. Ours seemed almost immediately better able to relax after revision and I think that helped in a lot of ways with everything.

FWIW, he's still held-to-extend for every nap at 5.5 months but sleeps through the night, plays independently on his playmat for good chunks of time, is happy to hang out in an activity center and watch us do chores, and is overall an absolute delight to be around 90% of his awake time, and has been that way since about 12-14 weeks. And he was HARD in the early days. It gets easier, but you'll still probably have days you feel touched out and like you have zero time for yourself even beyond the newborn days.

Good luck, you're doing great.

Anonymous wrote:It gets better but it gets better very gradually. I’m so sorry. You will get through this but keep your expectations low.

My kids are 4 and 6 and while I love them very much, every day is a slog.

Anonymous wrote:I added a bottle of formula at 4 weeks. DH gave it at 11 p
m. I went to bed by 9:30 so i got about 4 to 5 hours of sleep.

Much more humane from everyone.

We do this with pumped milk (pumped in the morning), and either way it’s a great idea. When baby was 4 weeks old I would just nurse continuously through the horrible witching hour and then go to bed when the baby finally passed out at 10ish, and DH would give the bottle a few hours later so I would get 5-6 hours straight. Foam earplugs.

I added a bottle of formula at 4 weeks. DH gave it at 11 p
m. I went to bed by 9:30 so i got about 4 to 5 hours of sleep.

Much more humane from everyone.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. Thanks everyone for responding. To those saying that breastfeeding gets easier, what exactly helped it get better? That’s been one of the hardest parts of everything so far.

I totally agree that nursing was by far the hardest part of the newborn stage. I remember on my feeding app one time tracking her being attached to me for a full 7 hours and that doesn't include all the time spent waking her up, getting her to latch, burping, etc.

It did get somewhat easier, she gradually got faster at nursing, but then I went back to work and I was pumping and that was challenging in other ways. We started supplementing with formula regularly at 6 months and that was a huge relief once she got used to it. Looking back, I wish we had done a bottle of formula a day from early on (maybe 12 weeks). The older they get, the more difficult it is to adjust to formula. Personally I think combination feeding (breast milk and formula) is awesome and doesn't get the credit it deserves - you get all the benefits of breast milk and much less stress.

I started out breast feeding but had supply issues. My baby always got 1-3 ounces of supplemental breast milk and never seemed to mind it. About month 5 we started working more formula in so that by 6 months we were at 15 oz formula /15 oz breast milk. She never blinked and then we transitioned to 100% formula by 8 months.

Every time you realize you made a huge mistake and want to give them away / run away, they do something to make it a little better. Smile then laugh then sleep through the night then start actually playing then crawling...etc. I HATED HATED HATED the newborn phase and by 6mo I was like “ok this isn’t so bad” and by one year I was planning to do it all over again. Hated the newborn phase again the second time around but had the perspective of accept help and power through bc it’s short in the scheme of things.