Anonymous wrote:You’re going to get flamed for your opinion here but I agree with you.

Same! I don’t see how spoon-feeding children does anyone good.

Anonymous wrote:The only way I have seen it done here is for the students to live at home and go to NOVA for two years and then transfer to GMU for two more years. They also worked in HS and college (20 hours per week during the school year and 50+ in the summer).

It is a perfectly fine way to do it.

Yeah, denying your smart kid all of the greatest years and experiences of their life to save a few bucks (which people like the OP will blow on leased cars, fashion or dining out) is TOTALLY worth it!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So I was a first generation college student. I worked really hard in HS and got decent scholarships for college. I primarily had merit-based aid, with a small amount of need-based aid and then student loans. I went to an expensive school. Costs worked out roughly as such:

40-45 k total
25 merit-based aid
5k need-based aid (Pell grant)
2k work study
10k student loans

I worked a lot in college and took out loans. It took me about 10 years to pay back the 40k and it never felt particularly onerous. I went to grad school via a program that paid for my degree entirely.

In my husbands case he had a full ride to a comparable school for tuition and his parents paid 10k/year for his room/board. He also has advanced degrees but did a combined ba/ma program and transferred in with a lot of credits so it ended up not costing much extra.

Our child is young but very bright and I believe she will be similarly high-performing in high school. We make more money than my family did, certainly, but we don't have dedicated college savings. I guess I am expecting my child to get a lot of merit-based aid and then figure we will be fine paying the rest.

I don't get why we would save 300k or whatever when I fully expect her to get merit aid. And if somehow she fizzles out and doesn't get merit-aid, then I would expect her to go to a cheaper school.

Am I missing something?

The missing link is the bolded. There are no guarantees that your kid will get merit aid. Why not be prepared?

+1 And, if you aspire for her to attend a highly ranked school, the top ranked schools do not give merit aid.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A lot of older people like yourself, OP, went to college at a time when education was more generously funded by state government, so the cost to attend a state school was easily afforded by someone with a readily-available summer job. This was typical before Congress and several administrations cut education funding both nationally and at the state level. Governmental funding of graduate education has also been slashed significantly in recent decades. These expenses have been shifted onto parents of college students and graduate students via federal student loan programs. This has been going on at a steady rate for two decades.

It is also much, much harder for young people to get entry-level jobs than it was twenty years ago. The job I had at 15 is not available to my own 15 year old child due to liability concerns. Many employers also find it cheaper and more convenient to hire workers on visas than teens. Some of these jobs that are not considered a liability risk have opened to teens during the pandemic, when work visas have been restricted, but expect to see that rolled back as soon as the pandemic is over.

I don't think this happened. The changes are at the state level, not federal and much has to do with colleges and universities trying to move up the USN&WR rankings. That is what has made it so expensive.

States absolutely have cut funding to public universities, accelerated by the 2008 financial crisis: https://www.cbpp.org/research/state-budget-and-tax/unkept-promises-state-cuts-to-higher-education-threaten-access-and

"Overall state funding for public two- and four-year colleges in the school year ending in 2018 was more than $7 billion below its 2008 level, after adjusting for inflation."

Anonymous wrote:So I was a first generation college student. I worked really hard in HS and got decent scholarships for college. I primarily had merit-based aid, with a small amount of need-based aid and then student loans. I went to an expensive school. Costs worked out roughly as such:

40-45 k total
25 merit-based aid
5k need-based aid (Pell grant)
2k work study
10k student loans

I worked a lot in college and took out loans. It took me about 10 years to pay back the 40k and it never felt particularly onerous. I went to grad school via a program that paid for my degree entirely.

In my husbands case he had a full ride to a comparable school for tuition and his parents paid 10k/year for his room/board. He also has advanced degrees but did a combined ba/ma program and transferred in with a lot of credits so it ended up not costing much extra.

Our child is young but very bright and I believe she will be similarly high-performing in high school. We make more money than my family did, certainly, but we don't have dedicated college savings. I guess I am expecting my child to get a lot of merit-based aid and then figure we will be fine paying the rest.

I don't get why we would save 300k or whatever when I fully expect her to get merit aid. And if somehow she fizzles out and doesn't get merit-aid, then I would expect her to go to a cheaper school.

Am I missing something?

The missing link is the bolded. There are no guarantees that your kid will get merit aid. Why not be prepared?

Anonymous wrote:A lot of older people like yourself, OP, went to college at a time when education was more generously funded by state government, so the cost to attend a state school was easily afforded by someone with a readily-available summer job. This was typical before Congress and several administrations cut education funding both nationally and at the state level. Governmental funding of graduate education has also been slashed significantly in recent decades. These expenses have been shifted onto parents of college students and graduate students via federal student loan programs. This has been going on at a steady rate for two decades.

It is also much, much harder for young people to get entry-level jobs than it was twenty years ago. The job I had at 15 is not available to my own 15 year old child due to liability concerns. Many employers also find it cheaper and more convenient to hire workers on visas than teens. Some of these jobs that are not considered a liability risk have opened to teens during the pandemic, when work visas have been restricted, but expect to see that rolled back as soon as the pandemic is over.

I don't think this happened. The changes are at the state level, not federal and much has to do with colleges and universities trying to move up the USN&WR rankings. That is what has made it so expensive.

If your daughter is STEM oriented, there are always ROTC scholarships. Those are still full ride (pay back in service after graduation), but a bit harder to come by.

So much vitriol! I have been accused of not loving my kids, buying luxury cars, being too stupid to have received merit aid myself and more. Just so many baseless assumptions.

Thank you to those who offered more nuanced thoughts.

Anonymous wrote:This is a lot of words that boil down to, "I did it, so can she. If she doesn't get merit aid, she'll just have to go to a cheaper/less competitive school."

Yep. Classic “ it worked for me so I don’t understand why anyone would do something different”

When I went to UC Berkeley in 1989-93 tuition/fees were around $1500 dollars a year. I got paid for my summer job $4 an hour. I was able to earn in 10 weeks in the summer my tuition/fees. I just had to come up with room and board, which was around $4,000.

Tuition at UC Berkeley and UCLA is now $14,000. If you earn $15 dollars a week working full time over the course of 10 weeks in the summer you would earn 6,000 dollars. Not even half the amount you need just for tuition/fees.

You should save enough, or be prepared to pay out of pocket, the cost of your in state flagship w/room and board. If your DC does get a merit offer it will still be paying at least that much, and that’s on top of taking loans. The merit offer will not come from the best school your DC could get admitted to, so options are limited from the get go.

A lot of older people like yourself, OP, went to college at a time when education was more generously funded by state government, so the cost to attend a state school was easily afforded by someone with a readily-available summer job. This was typical before Congress and several administrations cut education funding both nationally and at the state level. Governmental funding of graduate education has also been slashed significantly in recent decades. These expenses have been shifted onto parents of college students and graduate students via federal student loan programs. This has been going on at a steady rate for two decades.

It is also much, much harder for young people to get entry-level jobs than it was twenty years ago. The job I had at 15 is not available to my own 15 year old child due to liability concerns. Many employers also find it cheaper and more convenient to hire workers on visas than teens. Some of these jobs that are not considered a liability risk have opened to teens during the pandemic, when work visas have been restricted, but expect to see that rolled back as soon as the pandemic is over.

For us, it's our kid's college insurance/saving. Something (medical?) horrible could happen from now till then, and our savings and jobs could be wiped out. I mean, if that happens, our kid will survive like we did. But one of the reasons we work so hard is for him to have a better life than we had. It would suck if our kid have to go through the same things simply because of bad planning on our part.

Anonymous wrote:You sound really uninformed. The main reason to save is because you don't know what the future holds and it gives your kid options. You do you. But for me that's the definition of good parenting, giving your kid options.

See the PP that paid off her mortgage by 30 - I can think of a dozen ways that this benefitted her and I don't even know her.

This. My DH and I have talked a lot about how unlikely it is that college will work the way it does now, financially, by the time our kid is college age (in 15 years). It's already changed a lot since we graduated from college 20 years ago. It feels like we are hitting a breaking point with college costs and I think it's incredibly unlikely that the student loan system will continue to operate as it currently does for another 15 years -- it might not even survive the next 5 years because that dam is breaking.

But we are still putting money away for our child, just with the assumption that it may or may not pay for college. Maybe college will be something only extremely wealthy kids do by then (I hope not, but who knows), and she can use the money to get started on a different path, buying a house or getting technical training or certifications. Or maybe college will be more stripped down than it is now, but also more affordable with programs in place to keep kids from taking out loans. In that case, she might only need some of these savings and will be able to put the rest towards a house or travel or starting a business one day. Or maybe college will look exactly like it does now and we will just be glad we saved something.

I have no idea. But I feel confident we'll never look back and think, "Oh what a waste, we should never have set that money aside for our lone child to help her get started in life." Money is always useful. Trust me, because I didn't start with any and it was really hard!

So don't save for college. Many parents don't.