Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought this post was going to say he was breaking up with you by telling you that he didn’t want to renew the lease


Girl, no you have to pay your rent. Why would he put himself in a position to cover your portion of the rent if you are possibly unable to?

That’s very selfish and you need to see things from a different lense

He’s not saying he doesn’t want to be with you, he’s saying it would strain the relationship if you aren’t able to pay your rent and needs to do what is right for him financially

My pay does cover half the rent, but it doesn't leave a lot for utilities and groceries
He eats more than me, I get food at work as I am in food service.
So perhaps splitting groceries in half makes no sense

He also takes longer showers
Now he is coming to Thanksgiving at my parents and not contributing to the cost of the meal

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You guys aren’t on the same page with your goals.

Ideally, your partner is supportive of you reaching your goals and recognizes that it’ll help you out as a couple in the long run. Sacrificing a year or two now will set you up to be more financially stable in the future.

A good partner also wouldn’t want you to be stressed out at a job you hate just because it makes more money.

He’s a jerk, but it’s better to find out now than later on. You don’t want to be married to a bean counter - trust me, I’ve been there.

Can you afford another place on your own? Is there family you can stay with while you go back to school?

No. He's not a jerk. He's smart.

+1

OP find a roommate, live within your budget and see if this relationship can still survive. He isn't saying he wants to break up with you, just that he wants to live separately and not financially support you. And that's ok.

?

No man opts for an empty bed unless he’s detaching.

Sleeping over and subsidizing someone's rent are two different things.

He didn't break up with her unless OP left that out of her post.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought this post was going to say he was breaking up with you by telling you that he didn’t want to renew the lease


Girl, no you have to pay your rent. Why would he put himself in a position to cover your portion of the rent if you are possibly unable to?

That’s very selfish and you need to see things from a different lense

He’s not saying he doesn’t want to be with you, he’s saying it would strain the relationship if you aren’t able to pay your rent and needs to do what is right for him financially

My pay does cover half the rent, but it doesn't leave a lot for utilities and groceries
He eats more than me, I get food at work as I am in food service.
So perhaps splitting groceries in half makes no sense

He also takes longer showers
Now he is coming to Thanksgiving at my parents and not contributing to the cost of the meal

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, he’s a jerk.

And don’t let all the anti-women posters here get you down.

Give us some rough numbers: what’s the rent, what does he pay, what do you pay? How much are other expenses? How much did you get paid in your old job and now in your current one?

Your boyfriend and you should be agreeing about finances; moving to a cheaper place is one option. Him getting angry at your income is a problem — you should be figuring out your plan together.

As a woman, kindly shut up. It's not anti-woman to expect OP to be responsible for herself and act as a partner instead of her boyfriend's pampered pet.

I supported my now DH, but then only a boyfriend, through college and he later did for me for graduate school when I wanted to change fields. It's called growing a future together.

This.

Before we got married, DH and I moved in together. He supported me when I was in law school. I obviously wasn’t working, so I wasn’t bringing any money to the table. It wasn’t an issue at all. Why? Because we were in love and planned to get married.

I’m always shocked by the dcum relationships where couples keep their money separate and are aggressively tit for tat on every expense or chore. Imho, those relationships are doomed.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought this post was going to say he was breaking up with you by telling you that he didn’t want to renew the lease


Girl, no you have to pay your rent. Why would he put himself in a position to cover your portion of the rent if you are possibly unable to?

That’s very selfish and you need to see things from a different lense

He’s not saying he doesn’t want to be with you, he’s saying it would strain the relationship if you aren’t able to pay your rent and needs to do what is right for him financially

My pay does cover half the rent, but it doesn't leave a lot for utilities and groceries
He eats more than me, I get food at work as I am in food service.
So perhaps splitting groceries in half makes no sense

He also takes longer showers
Now he is coming to Thanksgiving at my parents and not contributing to the cost of the meal

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, he’s a jerk.

And don’t let all the anti-women posters here get you down.

Give us some rough numbers: what’s the rent, what does he pay, what do you pay? How much are other expenses? How much did you get paid in your old job and now in your current one?

Your boyfriend and you should be agreeing about finances; moving to a cheaper place is one option. Him getting angry at your income is a problem — you should be figuring out your plan together.

As a woman, kindly shut up. It's not anti-woman to expect OP to be responsible for herself and act as a partner instead of her boyfriend's pampered pet.

I supported my now DH, but then only a boyfriend, through college and he later did for me for graduate school when I wanted to change fields. It's called growing a future together.

This.

Before we got married, DH and I moved in together. He supported me when I was in law school. I obviously wasn’t working, so I wasn’t bringing any money to the table. It wasn’t an issue at all. Why? Because we were in love and planned to get married.

I’m always shocked by the dcum relationships where couples keep their money separate and are aggressively tit for tat on every expense or chore. Imho, those relationships are doomed.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought this post was going to say he was breaking up with you by telling you that he didn’t want to renew the lease


Girl, no you have to pay your rent. Why would he put himself in a position to cover your portion of the rent if you are possibly unable to?

That’s very selfish and you need to see things from a different lense

He’s not saying he doesn’t want to be with you, he’s saying it would strain the relationship if you aren’t able to pay your rent and needs to do what is right for him financially

My pay does cover half the rent, but it doesn't leave a lot for utilities and groceries
He eats more than me, I get food at work as I am in food service.
So perhaps splitting groceries in half makes no sense

He also takes longer showers
Now he is coming to Thanksgiving at my parents and not contributing to the cost of the meal

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You guys aren’t on the same page with your goals.

Ideally, your partner is supportive of you reaching your goals and recognizes that it’ll help you out as a couple in the long run. Sacrificing a year or two now will set you up to be more financially stable in the future.

A good partner also wouldn’t want you to be stressed out at a job you hate just because it makes more money.

He’s a jerk, but it’s better to find out now than later on. You don’t want to be married to a bean counter - trust me, I’ve been there.

Can you afford another place on your own? Is there family you can stay with while you go back to school?

No. He's not a jerk. He's smart.

+1

OP find a roommate, live within your budget and see if this relationship can still survive. He isn't saying he wants to break up with you, just that he wants to live separately and not financially support you. And that's ok.

?

No man opts for an empty bed unless he’s detaching.

Anonymous wrote:I thought this post was going to say he was breaking up with you by telling you that he didn’t want to renew the lease


Girl, no you have to pay your rent. Why would he put himself in a position to cover your portion of the rent if you are possibly unable to?

That’s very selfish and you need to see things from a different lense

He’s not saying he doesn’t want to be with you, he’s saying it would strain the relationship if you aren’t able to pay your rent and needs to do what is right for him financially

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, he’s a jerk.

And don’t let all the anti-women posters here get you down.

Give us some rough numbers: what’s the rent, what does he pay, what do you pay? How much are other expenses? How much did you get paid in your old job and now in your current one?

Your boyfriend and you should be agreeing about finances; moving to a cheaper place is one option. Him getting angry at your income is a problem — you should be figuring out your plan together.

As a woman, kindly shut up. It's not anti-woman to expect OP to be responsible for herself and act as a partner instead of her boyfriend's pampered pet.

I supported my now DH, but then only a boyfriend, through college and he later did for me for graduate school when I wanted to change fields. It's called growing a future together.

This.

Before we got married, DH and I moved in together. He supported me when I was in law school. I obviously wasn’t working, so I wasn’t bringing any money to the table. It wasn’t an issue at all. Why? Because we were in love and planned to get married.

I’m always shocked by the dcum relationships where couples keep their money separate and are aggressively tit for tat on every expense or chore. Imho, those relationships are doomed.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You guys aren’t on the same page with your goals.

Ideally, your partner is supportive of you reaching your goals and recognizes that it’ll help you out as a couple in the long run. Sacrificing a year or two now will set you up to be more financially stable in the future.

A good partner also wouldn’t want you to be stressed out at a job you hate just because it makes more money.

He’s a jerk, but it’s better to find out now than later on. You don’t want to be married to a bean counter - trust me, I’ve been there.

Can you afford another place on your own? Is there family you can stay with while you go back to school?

No. He's not a jerk. He's smart.

+1

OP find a roommate, live within your budget and see if this relationship can still survive. He isn't saying he wants to break up with you, just that he wants to live separately and not financially support you. And that's ok.